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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To want to flying headbutt DP?!

233 replies

WhingeyMinge · 17/03/2015 21:09

I look after DS (7 months) all day every day and put him to bed every night. I bath him at 7pm, dress and feed him and he's usually asleep in his cot by around 7.30pm. DP gives him lots of kisses before I take him up to bed but when we go up to bed ourselves (usually around 10pm) he is just so noisy and has to kiss DS on the face at least 10 times which wakes him up EVERY SINGLE FRIKKIN NIGHT!! DP then gets in to bed and lays there while I have to get up and try to settle DS because he's now crying his eyes out, this can take about 30 mins or more, which is a lot when I've been up since 6am and just want to get in to bed. It's really winding me up so I've decided to move DS to his own room starting from tonight so that he doesn't have to be disturbed, when I told DP he said "I'm not really happy about you moving him yet, I'll still have to go in and give him a kiss anyway because it's just the way I am and I've always done it"
AAAARRRGGGGHHHH I told him that from now on if he wakes him then he has to stay up with him until he's settled as it's unfair cos I'm really tired and it's also unfair on DS having to be woken every night. Plus he's less likely to re-settle when he realises he's in a different room without us.
He thinks I'm being unreasonable! It's not as if he doesn't kiss him before I take him up to bed in the first place, plus if he really really has to why can't it just be one gentle one that doesn't wake him?! Angry
Who is being unreasonable here? I'm so fed up his selfish attitude!

OP posts:
TheoriginalLEM · 17/03/2015 21:11

your dh Is a twat

CocktailQueen · 17/03/2015 21:12

Oh, Jesus, do you have to ask? He is being vvvvvvu. If he wakes DS, why the heck should you have to settle him again? Completely unfair of your h. That is really twattish.

basgetti · 17/03/2015 21:12

Your DP is a selfish prick.

MrsEvadneCake · 17/03/2015 21:13

He's being unreasonable. If he wakes DS then he needs to settle him.

lordsquidgy2013 · 17/03/2015 21:14

From a bloke. Your DP is a twat. Make him stay up, he'll soon learn.

CluckingBelle · 17/03/2015 21:15

That is really odd. Who the hell wakes a sleeping baby?

Comingoutofhibernation · 17/03/2015 21:15

Does your DP actually enjoy upsetting DS? That is just odd, and unpleasant"

eurochick · 17/03/2015 21:15

He is being a twat.

CupidStuntSurvivor · 17/03/2015 21:15

He wakes your sleeping baby then leaves you to deal with the aftermath. Every. Single. Night.

Of course YANBU! What's he fucking playing at?!

AnyFucker · 17/03/2015 21:16

is your DP thick or summat ?

BastardGoDarkly · 17/03/2015 21:16

He's being a selfish childish utter knob!? He's waking the poor baby just to kiss him?! Wtf!

I'd have gone ape shit the first time, let alone every night.

Stick to your guns op, He wakes him, he settles him, he'll soon go off the fucking stupid decision.

woowoo22 · 17/03/2015 21:17

Dick. What's he like otherwise? Angry

Joyfulldeathsquad · 17/03/2015 21:17

If he wakes him up make sure you keep to your word. He won't do it again.

I had this with DP and dd2. He would come in from work and she would still be awake in her cot and he would go and get her. Then after 10 mins he would wander off and leave me to deal with an over tired toddler. So I made him settle her or went out. That soon stopped.

It's just selfishness Angry

PippaPug · 17/03/2015 21:18

He a twat, he wakes the baby up, he can deal with the baby!

NeedsAsockamnesty · 17/03/2015 21:18

A jury of your peers would be highly unlikely to convict you

And I would give you an alibi

3gorgeousgirlies · 17/03/2015 21:18

What an idiot. Poor baby too.

TeWiSavesTheDay · 17/03/2015 21:18

What the hell???

Why on earth would he keep waking a baby? Yes he damn well should stay up and settle him.

While you're at it if he's at home in the evenings why doesn't he do some bath/bedtimes?

BlueBananas · 17/03/2015 21:18

Why would you wake a sleeping baby? On purpose! Why?!
Your DH is a knob
Do you think he wants to spend more time with him? Maybe if he gives him his bath will he stop unnecessarily smooching him in his sleep?

FryOneFatManic · 17/03/2015 21:20

It is perfectly possible to give a light kiss when DS is asleep. DP has gone into our DCs rooms for a quick kiss since they were born, and they are now 14 and 11 (okay, he can't kiss the 14 yr old, who's in a high rise bed, but he always goes in to check on her).

He's never woken the DC's except for a couple of accidental wakings when they were younger. And he settled them as he'd woken them.

Your DP is being a twat who is only thinking of himself and what he wants.

It's absolutely not fair on the child to keep breaking his sleep like this. Your baby needs his sleep and broken sleep is just not good.

CrabbyTheCrabster · 17/03/2015 21:24

So why the fuck do you step in and settle him back down then? Let him deal with the situation he's created! Leave DS in with DP and go to sleep in the other room. He'll soon change his behaviour when he's the one who has to deal with a screaming baby.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 17/03/2015 21:27

What an utter twat. Make him deal with the baby HE woke up.

BuildYourOwnSnowman · 17/03/2015 21:31

Does he think your ds is a doll? Does he do any parenting or just kisses and cuddles?

Why would it not bother him that he has woken up his baby and caused him to cry for half an hour?

I don't think the colourful language above is colourful enough tbh

FlabbyMummy · 17/03/2015 21:31

Stand next to the cot and when he leans in to kiss the baby punch him in the face.

BlueBananas · 17/03/2015 21:33

Grin yes! What FlabbyMummy says!

MrTumblesSpottyHag · 17/03/2015 21:35

What the fucking fuck is he playing at?? I want to give him a kick in the balls just reading your post!
He's a dick.