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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want to flying headbutt DP?!

233 replies

WhingeyMinge · 17/03/2015 21:09

I look after DS (7 months) all day every day and put him to bed every night. I bath him at 7pm, dress and feed him and he's usually asleep in his cot by around 7.30pm. DP gives him lots of kisses before I take him up to bed but when we go up to bed ourselves (usually around 10pm) he is just so noisy and has to kiss DS on the face at least 10 times which wakes him up EVERY SINGLE FRIKKIN NIGHT!! DP then gets in to bed and lays there while I have to get up and try to settle DS because he's now crying his eyes out, this can take about 30 mins or more, which is a lot when I've been up since 6am and just want to get in to bed. It's really winding me up so I've decided to move DS to his own room starting from tonight so that he doesn't have to be disturbed, when I told DP he said "I'm not really happy about you moving him yet, I'll still have to go in and give him a kiss anyway because it's just the way I am and I've always done it"
AAAARRRGGGGHHHH I told him that from now on if he wakes him then he has to stay up with him until he's settled as it's unfair cos I'm really tired and it's also unfair on DS having to be woken every night. Plus he's less likely to re-settle when he realises he's in a different room without us.
He thinks I'm being unreasonable! It's not as if he doesn't kiss him before I take him up to bed in the first place, plus if he really really has to why can't it just be one gentle one that doesn't wake him?! Angry
Who is being unreasonable here? I'm so fed up his selfish attitude!

OP posts:
CheshireCait · 17/03/2015 21:35

Another 'twat' vote. Also 'idiot'. And 'inconsiderate fucker' for good measure.

When you go to bed, GO TO BED. Whatever happens between him and the baby is his responsibility. He'll cop on quickly enough!

NeedsAsockamnesty · 17/03/2015 21:37

Thinking about this further its incredibly unkind to do that to the baby.

Is he often unable to put a child's needs over his wants?

Original poster
WhingeyMinge · 17/03/2015 21:39

I am going to try to leave him settle him if he wakes but it's hard because I know fully well that he'll just get in bed and say "leave him to it he'll settle himself soon enough" and then I'll end up getting up cos it's not fair on DS Sad

OP posts:
OddBodkins · 17/03/2015 21:39

You're kidding me?! I'd have gone mad if my dp had done that when Dd was little. It's really inconsiderate both to you and your ds. Why wake him up when he's settled. Definitely put a stop to this. It's ridiculous!

BuildYourOwnSnowman · 17/03/2015 21:42

Set your alarm for 3am. Hide the alarm clock. Preferably under his side of the bed. Then go and sleep in with ds.

He's a mean fucker waking your ds up and leaving him to cry

TheOriginalWinkly · 17/03/2015 21:43

He's a prick. That's the sort of thing my aunt's ex husband would do. Note the ex.

TendonQueen · 17/03/2015 21:43

Tell your idiot partner that unless he gets up and settles your DS properly after waking him, then you and DS will be sleeping in the same room from now on without him, and you will not be letting him in to wake up your sleeping child.

RocketInMyPocket · 17/03/2015 21:44

Angry Fuming on your behalf OP. Who DOES THAT? How fucking selfish? Is this some sort of power trip?

YANBU! However flying headbutt followed by drop kick would be my personal recommendation.

HolgerDanske · 17/03/2015 21:44

There is a really nasty undercurrent to what he's doing here. Almost as if he enjoys being wholly unreasonable. He's being extremely self centred and selfish, unkind to his child and horrible to you.

If he wakes the little one, he needs to stay in there and settle him! What a nasty thing to do.

TheMaw · 17/03/2015 21:45

I'm another one who thinks he's a dickhead, and I also find your post quite upsetting. It's bizarre to wake up a sleeping baby just for this, and especially weird to leave you to deal with it. How is he otherwise with DS?

RocketInMyPocket · 17/03/2015 21:45

I second Snowmans idea

OfficerVanHalen · 17/03/2015 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CocktailQueen · 17/03/2015 21:45

Show him this thread, op.

Or punch him in the face, as FlabbyMummy say :)

Is he a twat in other areas too? Or just this one? How is he with DS when he is awake?

ZoeReynolds · 17/03/2015 21:47

Flying headbutt?

And that's funny because you're female and he's male? The other way around would be DV of course.... Hmm

RocketInMyPocket · 17/03/2015 21:47

I also agree with Holger and TheMaw that this is beyond unreasonable, uncomfortable to read, and comes across as aggressive and calculated.....
Does he have any other controlling tendencies?

BlueBananas · 17/03/2015 21:49

I wondered how long someone would come on with the "domestic violence isn't funny" comment
She's not actually going to flying headbutt her husband! Calm down!
it would be far too painful for OP anyway

Ooooooooh · 17/03/2015 21:50

Go to bed early and let him deal with it?

ZoeReynolds · 17/03/2015 21:52

I don't need to calm down thanks bananas darling Smile

It's either ok to joke about physically assaulting your partner or it isn't. I'm just serenely casting my vote for 'isn't'.

MrsTerryPratchett · 17/03/2015 21:54

I our house it's; you broke it you fix it. However your DH seems to think that he can break it and then ignore it. Fuck that shit. His choices are to settle him down to sleep after this idiocy or STOP waking him in the night.

Is he normally a mean, thoughtless arse? I might actually have headbutted DH if he's pulled this when I got 4 hours or less every night for two years. Sleep deprivation is torture.

whoopsbunny · 17/03/2015 21:54

I would have pummelled into unconsciousness anyone that woke my babies at 10pm.

Move yourself and baby into a different room - see how he likes them apples.

OfficerVanHalen · 17/03/2015 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LumpySpacedPrincess · 17/03/2015 21:56

Is he always so knobish or is it just around babies?

EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 17/03/2015 21:57

What the fucking fuck is wrong with his head?

Eminado · 17/03/2015 21:59

What Officer said.

Omnly on mumsnet.

karinmaria · 17/03/2015 22:00

Your 'D'P is a selfish twat.