to think Mumsnetters are quite antisocial?

[ifdaryldiesweriot]

Just from reading different threads its just the feeling I get.

People don't answer the door or their home phone.

It has to be also be pre-arranged for anyone to pop over. My cousin came to deliver something today, no idea she was coming, happy to see her and invited her in.

People don't seem to like other people in their house, I was at a friends party last week. They were still up at 7am, I fell asleep and ended up staying the night - didn't ask and it wasn't a problem. I think this would horrify some.

A "girls night" seems to be viewed as rather childish.

If a partner has friends over it seems to have mutual agreement that this is annoying.

I could be very wrong and happy to be told so.

I don't have a home phone but I don't answer private numbers or 0800 numbers on my mobile, I never answer the intercom unless I'm expecting it and I never, ever have people round to my flat because guests make me anxious. I'd much rather arrange to meet someone for coffee or lunch.

I'm very much an introvert and see nothing wrong with it.

I have a sign on my door saying in a polite way to please bog off if you selling anything or want to talk about Jesus. Its working really well

Goodness there is a lot of judgement on here simply for others having different practices.
I very rarely open the door to anyone I don't know every time I do I regret it.
We have a big issue with cold callers in my area, it is a nice area fairly affluent that is on a long stretch of road into town they start at the top of the hill and work their way down to the bottom. It is not unusual in the summer months to have 3-4 cold callers, charity bag put through the doors and all manner if junk mail each day.

They are often aggressive too. I had to get the police out to deal with a group of 3 of them harassing and threatening my DH after he politely went to our vulnerable neighbours aid (they had treated me in the same aggressive manner) to ask for their business details. The police said that they are getting more and more complaints about cold callers behaving aggressively and going out in groups.

Even the electricity meter reading man has been abusive on two seperate occasions.

So unless you are my mother I ignore the door if I'm not expecting anyone.

OnlyLovers, not just you, but as you mention the book, the book is about some people's experiences, a lot of people, and their experiences, which they have had, and are having. You don't get to be not convinced. You get to be not interested; not one of those people; not someone who likes having people like that around; many other things. you don't get to be not convinced.

"can we open a window? I'm hot"
"not convinced"

DOESN'T WORK

the second person in this exchange just doesn't care and / or thinks they are more important

And to the people who are saying "it's just opening a door" - well quite. Lucky you! Fling those doors around with gay abandon.

Well, I still think we're talking about slightly different things. And I'm sorry but I really don't understand the opening a window analogy.

And guess what? I 'do dare' to keep saying I wasn't convinced by Quiet. Because I wasn't.

Reading this makes me wonder about myself. I can honestly say that I've never felt drained or worn out by interacting with other people, in fact I'd go so far as to say I don't really understand how that would feel.

But similarly I've got no idea how it would feel to feel energised by other people. Neither of those are feelings I have experienced. I just...exist. Sometimes I like time alone, sometimes I enjoy seeing people. I feel completely indifferent to people ringing or knocking on my door, I neither like it nor dislike it. Sometimes I answer, sometimes I don't (although I would always always answer to someone I know or even vaguely recognise).

All this talk of 'how dare someone knock my door' versus 'how dare anyone else not answer their door' makes me wonder if my feelings are unusual.

Antisocial means you go to parties and shit in the plantpots.

According to the threads, half of Mumsnetters don't shower every day and / or don't flush their own piss, so either unsociable or antisocial is fine.