Ive cancelled the sleepover, the mum has ignored that and posted all over fb about how shes glad her child is on a sleepover tonight.

[vintagecrap]

AIBU to be cross?

im ill. ive been ill for the last 3 days and have an appt in out of hours in an hour.
Im a lone parent, house is a mess, no food in, cant hardly make it off the sofa.

DD was meant to be having a friend over tonight nad we were looking after her tomorrow. I called the mum and said yesterday that i might have to cancel, and this morning i have cancelled. She hasnt replied to my text at all.

But instead posted on fb about how shes childfree tonight and whats shes doing.

WTF?

Ring her and make it very clear.

Post and remind her it has been cancelled. She might not have got your text. Or call her

Maybe someone else is hosting her dd for a sleepover?

Maybe she's arranged a sleepover elsewhere or not noticed the text. I'd phone her.

Reply on her FB and say you are glad she found someone else to have her DD tonight, sorry again that you had to cancel, you're off out to the OOH now, will let her know how you are to maybe reorganise for another day.

Perhaps the child is staying at someone else's tonight

Is it possible she hasn't seen the text? Just comment on her status to tell her to check her phone. If she has seen her phone and is posting that to guilt trip you then that's odd. Hope you feel better soon.

Yes, she as probably found somewhere else.

Perhaps she hasn't got your text? You need to speak to her.

She knows bloody rightly that you've cancelled but she's trying to guilt you into doing it. Just post on her Facebook how you're sorry you had to cancel the sleep over but, as you said in your text last night, you're too ill to do it. That way others will know you tried to contact her and your reasons for doing so. If she starts bitching then just ignore. If you respond she'll still try to guilt you into it. Stick a note on your front door, saying "sleep over cancelled due to illness, as stated in the text and Facebook" in case she just rocks up with the child.

Call her. Surely that would have been the obvious course of action in the first place to avoid confusion?

Why can't people pick up phones and actually SPEAK to each other nowadays?!

Oops xposted with half of mumsnet. I suppose it is possible she's got someone else, but if not, I stand by my previous post.

Call her she might not have got the text! Hope you feel better soon x

Ring her and apologise for the disappointment for your dd's and her. Maybe she could host instead ?

I cant phone her as i cant talk, i have totally lost my voice there is just no sound.

I text her again and she said that she had plans to go out, so we have compromised and ive got her child for 4 hours rather than overnight and still all day tomorrow.

But ive told her i cant look after her and she needs to be good. They are older, so hopefully will be ok just being left to it.

Your dd can speak ?

What?! You aren't well and she is still sending her DD to yours for 4 hours Fuck that.

She needs to cancel her plans or find someone else to babysit.

Ridiculous.

If you don't feel well then she should make other arrangements. She is being selfish IMHO and no friend.

You've compromised?]hmm]

You've still got this child apart from overnight and you say you felt ill enough to have wanted to cancel, you've been strong armed to give into this other parent.

OP, you are bonkers and she is unbelievably unreasonable and selfish. Sorry. Besides, why would she risk her DD catching whatever you have. Hope she catches it but doesn't develop it and passes it on to her selfish mother. Not sure if such a thing is macrobiologically possible.

Don't be a pushover OP - you are ill, that trumps her going out.

JUST SAY NO FFS!

* obviously!

Of course you can talk or croak.
How old is your daughter?
I remember you and the awful evening with the sexist drunk boyfriend and father and how apart from everything else you were setting an awful example of people pleasing and assertiveness to your daughter.
How's that working out?