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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel really upset that a mum sent her child to school ill again

795 replies

Yesitismeagain · 05/02/2015 17:01

I work in a primary school. One boy (age 9) cried today because he felt so unwell. He was ill yesterday (temperature and feeling ill with it) and his parents were called early, but they didn't come till normal pick up.

Today he was back in, but was obviously very unwell from the start. The school phoned by 9.30am to come and get him. He was crying, shivering and just lying on the floor in the 'sick room' (a small room off the office).

By 2pm a parent still hadn't arrived. The office were told that the neither parent could come as they work.

Is it just me that this is neglect?

OP posts:
IsItMeOr · 05/02/2015 17:03

Surely the school has a policy for dealing with this scenario?

It does sound like neglect to me, but I am no expert. Hope the DC is okay.

ApocalypseThen · 05/02/2015 17:03

It doesn't sound good, but at least you identified which parent is at fault.

sosix · 05/02/2015 17:04

Boy should of been at home but if parents can't get out of work they can't I guess. I would of thought they would of dosed him and sent meds in, he might have felt right as rain for 3/4 hours then? Sad.

ilikebaking · 05/02/2015 17:06

We constantly have this. It's awful. I work in a primary school too and we just cannot deal with sick children. Keep them at home.

DoJo · 05/02/2015 17:07

The office were told that the neither parent could come as they work.

So why is the mum to blame again?

DoJo · 05/02/2015 17:07
mywholelifeisaheadache · 05/02/2015 17:09

Surely it's now a child protection issue?

vintagesewingmachine · 05/02/2015 17:10

You need to pass this up the chain at school in the first instance. There must be someone who is the safeguarding lead. This sounds horrible, poor boy. He must feel as if his parents care more about their jobs than him.

LittleBairn · 05/02/2015 17:10

This is really unprofessional of you to post. Surely most schools now a days require staff to agree not to post online about the going on inside the school?
If you are wondering if its neglect then clearly you don't have any child protection training, the memeber of staff responsible will deal with it.

I8toys · 05/02/2015 17:12

WTF - you can't send a sick child to school. I work, my husband works - we take it in turns to have time off if the need arises. Child first and work second.

What would happen if he had D&V - its okay to keep him at school because his mum and dad are at work? And again what if he has an accident and needs to go to the hospital?

tiggytape · 05/02/2015 17:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LIZS · 05/02/2015 17:13

It may be true that they need to work but school should insist on another contact who would be able to come in an emergency. Agree if they took so long it should become a safeguarding issue , they cannot expect the school to nurse a sick child until it suits them and it should be treated as if they had failed to collect at pick up time.

TidyDancer · 05/02/2015 17:15

This is awful. Parents in DS's school have done similar, but never two days in a row. The parents in this case sound awful - clearly not fussed about their DS's welfare over their work.

Use of mum in title is, I presume, an error unless she does all drop offs? I hope posters are pedantic enough to focus on that.

SeattleGraceMercyDeath · 05/02/2015 17:15

So he has two parents? So why are you blaming the mum for sending him to school? Luckily my husband can leave the office if either of our children need collecting as it's understood barring death or hospital admission it's very very difficult for me to leave work.

SeattleGraceMercyDeath · 05/02/2015 17:17

Also our school takes several contacts in order to ensure they can get in touch with someone if either I or their father are not available.

BarbarianMum · 05/02/2015 17:20

Don't agree. Totally anonymous and happens in schools across the country all the time so no chance of anyone outing school or family involved.

LadySybilLikesSloeGin · 05/02/2015 17:24

Do you know how much pressure the schools put on parents to send their child in when they are unwell? You're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

ahbollocks · 05/02/2015 17:40

Poor kid :( someone should have come. I know id never leave dd this way
Perhaps the school didnt stress enough how poorly he was? Did they ring once or repeatedly?

My own experience but my mum left me to soldier on for a couple of hours once, they'd told her I was poorly but in reality it was a batshit crazy migraine, I couldn't see and was projectile vomitting all iver the nurses office.
My poor mum was frantic when she saw the state I was in.

sosix · 05/02/2015 17:41

True ladysybil. Thats why if mine are ill they stay off and sod lea.

VirginiaTonic · 05/02/2015 17:49

Since when did school staff have to sign a secrecy code? OP hasn't mentioned name of school,child or parent so what is the issue? There are forums for teachers, they wouldn't exist if they weren't allowed to discuss school issues outside school?

26Point2Miles · 05/02/2015 17:58

Lol at it ALL being the 'mums' fault....really op??

LadySybilLikesSloeGin · 05/02/2015 18:00

I don't send my son in when he's unwell. He missed 2 days of GCSE mocks at the start of the term (they went on for 2 weeks) and the 'pastoral care' woman called me at 07:20 to see if he was making his illness out to be worse than it was. I've been threatened with social services before now too Confused Ds had a fever of 104 on this occasion. I have a friend who was not called by the school when her son was ill and she ended up having to rush him to the GP. Honestly, you can't win.

Aridane · 05/02/2015 18:00

If I were the parents, I would take a dim view of you posting this online,

Bluepants · 05/02/2015 18:02

Tell the head teacher. A parent at our school would be in hot water over that sort of behaviour.

Iggly · 05/02/2015 18:03

Well of course the parents would take a dim view of this being posted. Because it exposes their shitness.

It is anonymous.

The parents are awful.