To feel really upset that a mum sent her child to school ill again

[Yesitismeagain]

I work in a primary school. One boy (age 9) cried today because he felt so unwell. He was ill yesterday (temperature and feeling ill with it) and his parents were called early, but they didn't come till normal pick up.

Today he was back in, but was obviously very unwell from the start. The school phoned by 9.30am to come and get him. He was crying, shivering and just lying on the floor in the 'sick room' (a small room off the office).

By 2pm a parent still hadn't arrived. The office were told that the neither parent could come as they work.

Is it just me that this is neglect?

Those DCs sleep in their uniforms when it's cold; which are often only washed when they are rinsed in the classroom sink by a LSA.

It's not right, it's not ideal, but it's the reality of life for far to many DCs.

It might be the reality but SS should be involved as the every child matters guidance should not be allowing children to live in those conditions. Children who don't have clean clothes or access to proper medical care and living conditions should be a priority for social services.

What medication do you propose they give

clam I don't.

I fully accept that schools are unable, under current regulations, to medicate. Which is why a child with a fever should not be left in a school for hours - if their parents have refused to collect, the school should ensure the child is placed in the care of appropriate authorities, who can seek appropriate medical care.

Children who don't have clean clothes or access to proper medical care and living conditions should be a priority for social services.

Yes, they should. But there are higher priorities for SocServ - those DCs who are at risk of immediate serious harm - neglect comes further down the list.

"the schools I know try and provide a safe, comfortable place for the DCs when they're there rather then add to their misery."

I doubt there are any schools who deliberately "add to their misery." Why are you so determined to blame the schools/teachers here? Everyone on this thread has expressed concern for the poor child who is unwell enough to need to go home. Schools do the best they can to hold the fort for as long as necessary, but it's a question of how long that is. Parents, all parents, need to accept that this is their responsibility to organise.

the schools I know try and provide a safe, comfortable place for the DCs when they're there rather then add to their misery.

That isn't a solution to the problem, nor is it helpful to the child in the medium or long term. A better solution is to assist the family in getting beds, clothes and laundry facilities. I have helped families to get these things as there are charities that help in providing these things.
In any case, the family in OPs case are both working and don't appear to be (but I could be wrong) uneducated or leading chaotic lives. I am assuming that based on them both working in healthcare and able to get to work.

You're contradicting yourself here, Peruvian. One minute you're suggesting schools should contact SS for them to immediately collect an ill child if their parent hasn't, and then you're acknowledging that there are higher priorities (which of course there are).

Schools do the best they can to hold the fort for as long as necessary, but it's a question of how long that is. Parents, all parents, need to accept that this is their responsibility to organise.

My concern is that when parents can't/don't/won't accept that for whatever reason, schools seem to be unwilling to accept that there are other agncies who are responsible for meeting the DCs needs.

They would rather continue to remain responsible for the DC, despite their limitations and the continued suffering of the DC.

You can't change other people, but you can change your own behaviour. If schools object to being used as sick bays for unreliable parents , then there are processes in place to ensure they aren't. But schools have to change their behaviour in order to bring about that change.

One minute you're suggesting schools should contact SS for them to immediately collect an ill child if their parent hasn't, and then you're acknowledging that there are higher priorities (which of course there are).

No, I'm suggesting that schools do one or the other.

Either, accept responsibility for the DCs, and provide appropriate care, or call SocServ.

If SocServ then refuse to intervene because they don't have the resources, and they rely on schools to plug the gap, then that gives the school the evidence they need to prioritise a sick bay or similar because SocServ expect us to.

Like it or not, this comes down to money and politics - all the while schools cover up the shortcomings of other agencies, while at the same time, failing to meet the needs of DCs, then nothing will change.

"schools seem to be unwilling to accept that there are other agencies who are responsible for meeting the DCs needs."

Where's your evidence for this? Of course schools are aware of other agencies. But you yourself have just pointed out that SS, for instance, are rushed off their feet dealing with much more serious cases. It's totally unrealistic to expect that someone will leap into a car and race to the school and set up medical relief for a child who really only needs a spoonful of Calpol, a warm bed and a loving cuddle from his mum or dad.

And yes of course we all know that that's not going to happen for a lot of kids from difficult homes. But as I said earlier, schools can't fix all of society's ills. We do what we can, and put in place support where we can. Why are you determined to believe that we don't?

Sick bays in schools are not going to solve the problem.
And as was said earlier, we've been through all this several times and are going round in circles.

And as was said earlier, we've been through all this several times and are going round in circles.

Maybe that's because there is no solution? There will always be irresponsible and ineffective parents. And there will always be limited resource. And these are incompatible with each other.

Demanding that all parents meet a standard that fits the level of resource available, or demanding that all agencies accomodate the extent of crap parenting there is out there, are both equally unrealistic.

OK, well the OP asked at the end of her first post, "is this neglect?"

My answer would be yes, even if it's for all the reasons people have suggested in the thread. In fact, they would make it even more urgent for referral. But I think this has been said many times too.

Are we done?

It's sad really, that as a society when this happens so many people are quick to point the finger of blame rather than wondering how we can support families to stop this from happening.

If we legislated to make it easier for parents to take time off then employers may well be more reluctant to employ parents. I wonder how the people insisting it's simply bad parents would feel if their employment prospects were damaged in order to facilitate these 'bad parents' taking time off work?

neglect is:
"ongoing failure to meet a child basic needs"
"persistent failure to meet a child's basic needs"

I disagree with clam. this one off incident does not constitute neglect. it is not ongoing or persistent.

I know as a teacher it's difficult to broach the childrens' parents when they persistently send their children to school looking poorly, feeling poorly, unable to learn and infecting others, some who have conditions such as diabetes that means a virus can be very very serious! Often these same parents are the first to complain when things are not done to their entitled standards. Or make excuses so others will look after the nasty bits of parenting.

A clear school policy would be helpful, and also if you're smart enough to either use laws, negotiation or favours to work flexi time; making up hours, negotiating working from home or (shock horror) taking annual leave...then I think in 99 percent of cases you will be able to collect your sick child.

Where there's a will, there's a way

Yeah fred that will work well for the ones on zero hours contracts.

Zero hour contracts are hardly the schools responsibility though! It should schools pick up the pieces of all society's problems?

Well clearly not

Are all teachers right wing or just most of the ones ive seen post on here.

www.birminghammail.co.uk/news/midlands-news/alarming-200-per-cent-increase-8633711