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Original poster

To consider gender selection in Cyprus

213 replies

Dreamalittledream7 · 02/02/2015 12:03

I am currently pregnant with #4, 22 weeks and it's a little boy. This will be our third boy, we do have a daughter but we where hoping baby would be a girl and our family would be complete.
I hate the thought that my girl experience was ruined by PND and that I barely remember it, I want another little girl to love and bring up, I also hate the thought of my daughter never having a sister to play with.

Would it be mad to go and do this to get a girl? My husband is a bit shocked by my suggestion but he's being supportive.

OP posts:
APotNoodleandaTommy · 02/02/2015 20:58

Different people find different things offensive, Carla.

For example, I could tell you to go fuck yourself. That could offend you. Or you could find it funny.

I find gender selection offensive. However, I don't find it as offensive as some people, who have been greatly distressed by the OP. For many people, her OP was heinously offensive.

I have also stated several times that I don't think it was the OPs intention to be so offensive, which has clearly been demonstrated through her subsequent posts. So clearly, you get to choose what you read; as well as what you find offensive

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 02/02/2015 21:05

I wonder what MN would have been like 15/20 years ago when a woman may have come on here to express that she never loved her husband but instead loved her female friend?
I suspect many posters would have found it heinous and offensive.

It takes time for people to accept change and open their minds.

I am pleasantly surprised that there are a small proportion of posters who have a capacity to empathise.

APotNoodleandaTommy · 02/02/2015 21:10

I certainly wouldn't have found that offensive; sadly, it still happens
I may have expressed strong views but I haven't been offensive to the OP. Focus on someone else, plenty of folk have been gratuitously rude and offensive

birdofthenorth · 02/02/2015 21:15

OP just to say I have a girl and two boys and am expecting a third boy, and DD couldn't be happier to be the only girl , she thinks that makes her mini-Mummy and is generally being lovely and extremely excited about it. In all honesty I possibly would have preferred two boys and two girls too, had I got to choose. But I realise I am incredibly blessed and cannot wait to meet my beautiful son. Plus, I have to say I do do my best to minimise gender stereotypes in our household. One of my boys adores musicals and always plays dolls and shopping/ caring roll play rather than construction or fighting games. And he loves to raid the dressing up box, princess outfits and all. He's incredibly nuturing and gives the best cuddles. I hope you feel better soon OP and get a sense of closure, calm and excitement about your family and your new boy.

ChocolateBiscuitCake · 02/02/2015 21:17

My post wasn't directed at you potnoodle fwiw!!!

APotNoodleandaTommy · 02/02/2015 21:19

Glad to hear it chocolate, you used the words I've been bashed for using is all! Flowers

EdSheeran · 02/02/2015 21:23

I don't think you are 'over it' at all to be honest. There's a line between hoping for a girl and actively choosing expensive and invasive treatment to create one. You don't deserve to be battered and berated but I do think you're being unreasonable. Then again, I am really against gender selection, think it's a slippery slope.

betweenmarchandmay · 02/02/2015 21:28

Why on earth was my post deleted!?

SaltySeaBird · 02/02/2015 21:43

suboptimal your flu/cancer analogy is a good one and quite thought provoking. I am over sensitive to things relating to large families and unwanted pregnancy (the latter not being the case here).

I didn't actually post that it's "unfair" just that I found the OPs post that she was having a boy but due to gender disappointment was contemplating a 5th distasteful. It's kind of moving onto the next one before this one is even born. Wanting a sister for her DD seems to imply that having three brothers she'll be missing out. In turn that makes me feel bad for my DD who will never have a sibling (or even cousins within almost two decades of her age).

I do think some posters have been overly harsh, I don't think I was one of them.

slightlyconfused85 · 02/02/2015 21:45

Op I feel for you people have treated you harshly, you quite clearly love all your children and made no mention of abortion anywhere. Other peoples fertility issues are not your fault.

For what it's worth for the point you are making yabu, I have a sister who I never got on with as a child and two brothers I worshipped and loved to play with! You can make no guarantees about relationships between siblings: enjoy your children and think carefully about your next steps. Good luck Smile

PeppermintCrayon · 03/02/2015 02:36

OP replacing something you lost doesn't undo the loss. You will still have your grief and I would strongly recommend counselling.

Adarajames · 03/02/2015 03:22

If I had the money (and the health) to actually have a child, (but disability means I cant), then I'd like to have gone for gender selection to have a girl. My wanting that choice has no impact on another's choice / ability to have children / preference for one gender over another, it's just what I would've possibly chosen were it available to me. So no Op, I don't think Yabu

ProudAS · 03/02/2015 06:39

DNiece has 3 brothers and feels special being the only girl.

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