To consider gender selection in Cyprus

[Dreamalittledream7]

I am currently pregnant with #4, 22 weeks and it's a little boy. This will be our third boy, we do have a daughter but we where hoping baby would be a girl and our family would be complete.
I hate the thought that my girl experience was ruined by PND and that I barely remember it, I want another little girl to love and bring up, I also hate the thought of my daughter never having a sister to play with.

Would it be mad to go and do this to get a girl? My husband is a bit shocked by my suggestion but he's being supportive.

With any type of fertility treatment you are naturally discarding embryos; I don't in all honesty see why the gender matters as a reason to discard.

I read the OP as just wanting options. I thought similarly when I went for the 20 week scan with dd - thought 'if it's a boy we can choose the gender next time' - don't know if we'd have done it but it was nice to know we could.

Also, and I'll get flamed I bet - but I have horrible pregnancies and got through them by thinking I could terminate if I wanted to.

Obviously I didn't but knowing I could helped, in a strange way.

I also agree with PPs who have pointed out that there is a contradiction between your opposition to termination based on gender, and your interest in selecting embryos according to gender.

And yes, op hasn't actually decided. She was thinking it through.

Try reading all her posts.

Maybe you don't see what is wrong with it, thats up to you. My opinion is that gender selection should be used only in cases of genetic diseases that affect one sex.
We live in a world where babies are aborted because they are the wrong sex, and worse, are abandoned or murdered after birth for being the wrong sex. Girls are seen as second class in many places in the world. It feels like boys are over here, to a much lesser extent of course.

I find it beyond distasteful to state that you want another baby because the one you are having is the wrong sex, and you want to make sure that you don't have the wrong sex again.

You, of course, don't have to feel the same.

Well I guess I am a breeding machine then, as I have churned out five.

Op. I don't think YABU or NBU. its how you feel and I think you've had a raw deal on here (I've only read first few posts I'm afraid) we can't help our feelings and I didn't read it that you love your children any less, just that your horrible experience with PND when you had your dd has resulted in you feeling like you've missed out on something. It's your life, do what you need.

I can't for the life of me understand why these women are allowed to breed continuously when there are people who can't even have one child. Life is fucking unfair.

IVF for people who need it, great, amazing in fact. For gender selection, I do feel uncomfortable with it. I know I couldn't, because I'd feel too bad about the selection and discarding.

These women?

What do you mean by 'these women'

Yeah, it is unfair that I could easily have 5 children and others can't have one.

It's unfair the OP has four children when others can't have any.

Doesn't mean you have a right to call people who have a large family Breeding Machines.

hoping

Because another woman's ferility does not directly impact another's inferility?

Because we don't live in a country with forced sterilisation?

Some of these latest posts are outrageous.

If you don't like what you're reading piss off. Its as simple as that.

Its not other peoples fault that some can't conceive. No need to be so vile and nasty about it. Like i said, if you don't like what you're reading move on, no need to be so hateful.

I don't think OP should "do what you need" - the first consideration must be what is best for her current children and any future child.
She seems to be totally caught up in the pregnancy and new born stage. For some women I think it's almost addictive - they can't bear the thought of calling it a day and accepting that their family is now complete.

And tbh you know nothing about the op journey to become a parent, she could have gone through all sorts to get her children! How do you know she hasn't lost children or had miacarriages? You don't, so quit being horrible.

I really hope you aren't suggesting, hoping, that those of us with a lot of children should be forced to stop having them because some can't have any.

I can't for the life of me understand why these women are allowed to breed continuously when there are people who can't even have one child

That is probably the most silliest thing I have read here for a while. You can't understand why women should be able to have as many children as they want?

hoping I've seen some of your previous posts - I know you are worried that you may not be able to conceive but your comments are really nasty and uncalled for. As long as people can love, care for and financially support their children then it's up to them how many they have.

Hoping if this thread is upsetting you this much you need to hide it.
Calling other women on a parenting website a breeding machine purely because they can have children and choose to have a large family is downright nasty.

OP I feel for you. You are coming to terms with the reality that your family is not going to be what you dreamed of. There is nothing wrong with that.

I am sure when your little boy is here you will adjust to your new reality and begin to love your new family. Be kind to yourself in the meantime and ignore those who won't even try to understand or be empathetic to someone else's personal challenges. We all have our sensitive points.