aibu to my younger sister?

[Blackout234]

My sister (16 years old) is 20 weeks pregnant, i'm also pregnant(19 weeks)she is having a boy. I'm having a girl. for the last two days work has been heaving (I'm a mobile hairdresser, earnings vary) and i've earned alot of money, So I decided to go out and get myself some second hand pieces of baby clothing and look for a cot (for myself), however when doing so I came across a huge bundle of items for £150, when I say huge I mean HUGE. I can't even list everything in it but the main things are 10x massive bags of baby boy clothes up to 18 months, A lovely mamas and papas cot, a swing, playmat, changing table and an Icandy travel system. I went out and bought it (and filled my estate car to the brim!) I went and gave it to my sister for her birthday (Which is today), I didn't wrap anything but spent an hour at my mums house(Where sis lives) before she got out of bed putting everything up nicely and putting some ribbons on the bigger items. Its not like I handed it to her in black bags.
She came downstairs and went straight to her other gifts on the table, fairenough. then when I showed her what i'd gotten she seemed so unbothered by it then said "Eh i'm not really fussed to be honest with you. thanks but no thanks" Aibu to think she could have been a bit nicer? she's kept the stuff but i went above and beyond for her to do something nice (Ontop of shelling out for GHD's for today for her) . Shes 16, no job and her only income is 30 a week EMA so she's been unable to afford anything so far, i thought i was doing a nice thing :(

I'm so glad your sister likes all her baby stuff, OP - it's great to read about a positive end.

Some of the comments on here have been appalling. My niece had a baby at 16 and also had snidey, judgemental comments made about her. In her words: "I don't care what people say because I look at my baby and I know I've done the right thing."
Wishing you both all the very best in your pregnancies.

Blueberrywafer I know that's not what the thread is about, I just saw red after no many judgemental and ill informed comments about young mothers. They are one of the "easy targets" along with unemployed people, poor people, who become punching bags for cowards when times get tight. People who have ago at young mums or poor people when they feel the economic squeeze are no better who those go home after a bad day and kick the cat or hot their wives. It's all about feeling big by making someone who can't fight back feel worse that they do.

Handcream where did I say that people with small businesses shouldn't employ people? That is exactly the sort of situation tax credits are supposed to be for- not for big firms to pay huge bonuses.

However, there is a solid economic argument that if more people in low paid employment were paid more, that they would spend more on goods and services, thus creating more employment in their local area. People on low pay and benefits are more likely to spend any extra money they get, because they need to, because they have been running on a shoe string for so long.

People who are already on high incomes don't spend money- they save it, put in extra pension contributions etc. all perfectly reasonable things to do with money, but less likely to create more local jobs. The quickest way to reinflate a stagnant or shrinking economy is to give more money to the people on the lowest rungs, not on the highest.

So maybe if your friend paid those her employees more, they would spend more and extra employment would come from that.

So don't try to hide behind a knee jerk "well my friend would have to sack people" when anyone suggests something different to the neo-dickensian, low wage, zero hours contract, no job security, huge bonuses for chief execs mess we are currently in as a society.

Oh well coola OP's sister must be exactly the same as your 'silent' then. Whoever she is.

Like I say, I was skinto when we had ds1, but I still wanted and expected to have the choice of whether we had the red, blue, pink or green one out of the cheap whatever it was we could afford...or the spotty or the striped one.
I did have to choose from what we could afford, but I didn't have to take what I was given.
I still had a choice and I exercised it to reflect my own tastes. The very cheek of me eh?

good for you op, sticking up for your little sister, I wish I had one like you

"The one person who isn't going to be paying is the OP's sister,"

Well, not now as OP has bought the stuff!

But she may have done nearer the time!

The OP's sister never got the chance to pay - she's only 20 weeks along, so there is plenty of time to go yet. Just because your sil (worked it out) blew her maternity grant, doesn't mean that the OP's sister would do the same!
What a daft post.

Glad you sorted it out with your sister OP

Shocked at the amount of judgement toward OP's sister for her age!

I had DS at just turned 16. Never claimed benefits for him (I just didn't need to, my parents were superb and his dad got a job as he was 17) and shockhorror I still passed my GCSEs with A's, completed A-levels and went to university. All the while I remained with his father and we had a DD when I was 21.

Even once my relationship broke down, I got a professional full time job and have worked hard to forge a great partnership with my ex so we can raise our children together.

I haven't done anything special, most of the young parents I have met have similar stories of NORMALITY.

Fucking hell, it's not the end of the world as some people would have you believe

I agree supernova.
Some people watch too much tv.

My sister sat her GCSE's a year early and obtained A's and B's and has passed an NVQ level 2 in business law, she is currently in her final stage for level 3, she has completed nearly all of her level 3 assignments and will be sitting her finals next month. She is also planning for the future and her partner has just got a second job working night shifts 4 days a week. Yes, They're young, but shes got more going for her than I have and i don't get judged half as bad being nearly 20.

Why did you make your original post blackout?
Obviously you adore your sister, (and rightly so) however, if she is doing as well as you have explained. Why did you give her that massive bundle?

I am a little confused now.

Because I was worried she wasn't doing so well, the last i heard her partner was stuck on min wage with only one income and she was on 30 a week ema which stops soon, thankfully as I was told this morning he's managed to pull in a second job, educational wise she's fine she just can't get a job now as no one will hire an employee that will be leaving in 3-4 months time so it'll be very tight when the baby does come. I wasn't sure her boyfriend would be able to get a second job (he's been trying for months and it really didn't look likely) even now there income will be bumped up a bit each month its not a hell of alot in the grand scheme of things.

Oh okay... Hope it all runs smoothly for you all...

Glad you and your sis are fine now.

And I'm glad your sister has continued with education, sorry I must have missed the bit about her payment- it's not paid where I am. A lot of the girls in my school stayed on till 18 as we had a creche, and girls who were asked to leave expelled from other schools came to our school to have their babies with them while they finished their exams.

Best of luck to you both. And keep us posted, would love to know how you both get on.