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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not babysit niece over Christmas

206 replies

blingblingbling · 15/11/2014 14:08

Hi mumsnetters, newbie here lol. I have been asked by SIL to take her daughter Christmas day, as my bro and her are going away. I refused as its my daughters first christmas. Andwant to enjoy it with her anf my DH. Her daughter is very clingy and prone to tantrums. I refused in a very polite way, saying that its our first christmas as a family and I want to spend it with my DH and baby. My SIL is now saying that I am abandoning my niece because I havea child of my own now. That is not the case. AIBU to not want to babysit.

OP posts:
Castlemilk · 15/11/2014 14:31

'No, I'm not abandoning her - you are. Don't be so ridiculous.'

waithorse · 15/11/2014 14:32

YANBU. What time is the party ? Is it an evening thing ?

ApocalypseThen · 15/11/2014 14:34

Why is your sister in law discussing this with you rather than your brother?

Original poster
blingblingbling · 15/11/2014 14:35

My bro is 27, and she is 29. My DH and myself are both 23. My bro is trying to guilt me into it. Bling, you know how much DD Loves staying with you.

OP posts:
vienna1981 · 15/11/2014 14:36

Your brother and sister in law sound like pretty lousy specimens. First of all they have the unthinkable notion of abandoning their daughter at Christmas. As if that isn't bad enough your SIL then has the temerity to turn on the emotional blackmail.

Horrible pair of selfish nincompoops.Shame on them.

OP. Don't budge an inch.

Alisvolatpropiis · 15/11/2014 14:38

Shock they are both as bad as each other.

Say no and repeat until it sinks in to their thick skulls.

Stealthpolarbear · 15/11/2014 14:38

Who has a children not allowed party on christmas day? New Year's Eve fine. But Christmas Eve and Christmas Day is about families!

MyballsareSandy · 15/11/2014 14:40

Bloody hell. Who would leave their three year old on xmas day, if they didn't have to!! last xmas she was a bit young, at 2, to be that into it, this year will be great with a 3 year old, poor kid.

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye · 15/11/2014 14:41

My SIL has told me if I dont babysit, she and my bro cant go to the party.

Well boo-fecking-hoo.

It's only a party. They'll be others.

LuckyLuckyMe · 15/11/2014 14:42

Poor little girl being sent off on Christmas Day to her aunts Sad

WhereYouLeftIt · 15/11/2014 14:42

Well. I think we can all think of a reason why this child might be clingy and prone to tantrums Sad.

And as for "Bling, you know how much DD Loves staying with you." - I'd be responding 'That's probably because you and her mother are so shit at making her feel loved and valued, you selfish shit. Now fuck off and be a parent.' Angry

HelloItsMeFell · 15/11/2014 14:45

Your brother and SIL are being selfish arses and users. They shouldn't be out partying on Christmas Day when they have a small child at home ffs. Who goes to a party on Christmas Day? Who even has that sort of party on Christmas Day? Confused

I bet they are the sort that still expect to go to the pub every Friday and out clubbing regularly as well, aren't they? Twats.

You enjoy your being with your DH and your baby and tell them to get stuffed.

Original poster
blingblingbling · 15/11/2014 14:45

Im not budging on this one. I think as I babysat a lot before I got pregnant, they still expect it. And the party is at two. But its at her friends 2 hours away. And as for her not discussing it with my bro, she has. And I need to think of my DH. We both decided to have our own christmas with our dd. He decided against us spending it with his DM. If I have my niece that day, its hardly fair to him. And honestly, selfishly, the only child I want to focus on Christmas day, is my dd.

OP posts:
LuckyLuckyMe · 15/11/2014 14:45

I would copy and paste the replies to this thread and email them to her.

Lindy2 · 15/11/2014 14:45

Who even goes to a party on Christmas Day? It's family time where they spend the day with their own 3 year old.
Tell them no and that they need to put their child first not themselves.

YonicScrewdriver · 15/11/2014 14:47

Op, YANBU.

Why don't you suggest they get a hotel near the party and alternate going?

LindyHemming · 15/11/2014 14:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
blingblingbling · 15/11/2014 14:49

I should add, that her friend who is having the party, doesnt have kids. Neither do most of my SILs friends.

OP posts:
HelloItsMeFell · 15/11/2014 14:50

2 hours away? Shock So they'll be planning on leaving mid morning and coming home really late if not drinking, or planning to stay overnight.

Sad Poor, poor child. What utter arses.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 15/11/2014 14:51

You are obviously not being unreasonable. Do you look after your niece a lot? And has your brother / sil ever returned the favour?

fairnotfair · 15/11/2014 14:51

Poor little DN. YANBU. And your DB and SIL sound distinctly odd.

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 15/11/2014 14:51

What kind of parent wants to leave their child on Christmas day to go partying?

Also,where is the party as you said they are 'going away'?

Tell them to shove it and learn what Christmas is about

Stealthpolarbear · 15/11/2014 14:52

Have you had your niece on Christ,as day before?

Original poster
blingblingbling · 15/11/2014 14:52

Im starting to feel guilty. Not for them. For my niece. I dont know what to do now :(

OP posts:
SconeRhymesWithGone · 15/11/2014 14:53

I'm not a big Christmas person, but the idea of having a party on Christmas Day that does not include children is mind-boggling to me, as is the notion that parents of a young child would want to go to that party and leave their child with someone else. YANBU, OP.

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