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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To report a mother to the head

197 replies

squidge08 · 07/10/2014 10:30

bit of a rant here but AIBU to have reported a mother who shouted at my child to the head. I was absolutely livid! She even had the audacity to shout at me!

OP posts:
NorwaySpruce · 07/10/2014 10:33

Weird MN bug means I can't see your post 'til I post.... so here goes (I realise this is no use at all to you).

PiperIsOrange · 07/10/2014 10:34

Was this before school

PiperIsOrange · 07/10/2014 10:34

Was this before school

NorwaySpruce · 07/10/2014 10:35

Ah, I see it now.

It depends on why she shouted - I might report racist stuff for example, as you don't really want that in the playground.

I wouldn't report a shouty type generally, I'd just speak to them (depending on what my child had done - did your child harm someone?).

WeeClype · 07/10/2014 10:36

what was she shouting about?

ShadowStar · 07/10/2014 10:36

What was she shouting about?

WorraLiberty · 07/10/2014 10:37

Under what circumstance?

Kewcumber · 07/10/2014 10:38

Do you think the head will give her detention?

More info needed...

Igotafreegoattoo · 07/10/2014 10:39

Meh. I shouted at some kid last week for pushing DS over whilst lentil weaving mummy looked on. She told on me Hmm

Why did she shout at you?

ClapHandsIfYouBelieveInFatties · 07/10/2014 10:39

I would if she was aggressive. Why did she shout though? And what exactly was said....if it was "Don't hit my son with that stick!!" in a loud voice then no I wouldn't. If it was "You little bastard! Get here and I'll clout you!" then I would.

ILovePud · 07/10/2014 10:40

I think shouting at another parent or a child is rarely going to be appropriate but context is key, can you tell us a bit more?

MrsPiggie · 07/10/2014 10:40

Is it really the school's problem? Has it even happened on school premises? It's just something you have to deal with as adults, not sure at all about reporting it to the head, it looks a bit childish. What authority does the head have over parents?

Original poster
squidge08 · 07/10/2014 10:47

He accidently bumped into this womans chils so this woman thought it was her god given right to shout at him. Yes it was on school grounds but besides the point i wouldnt EVER shout at my own child let alone anyone else's. He has autsim and adhd so is hardly ever aware of his surroundings and would never hurt someone maliciously.

OP posts:
Vitalstatistix · 07/10/2014 10:47

Really it depends why she was shouting.

If your child was skipping down the road - not on. If your child was bashing hers over the head with something, you could probably understand a raised voice.

Vitalstatistix · 07/10/2014 10:48

sorry, x post.

NorwaySpruce · 07/10/2014 10:49

Really, in that case I wouldn't bother.

A yell of 'be careful there' if your child bumped into hers, hardly warrants 'reporting'.

Just tell your child they should have apologised, and forget it.

ClapHandsIfYouBelieveInFatties · 07/10/2014 10:50

But what exactly did she say? The thing is, her child could also have issues....it's wrong to shout but who knows why she did?

TheWitTank · 07/10/2014 10:51

What did she shout? Was it abusive or sweary? Did your son/you apologise? Did you get defensive and argue back?
If the mother was aggressive or threatening then yes I would speak to the head. Otherwise I would keep a wide berth and leave it.

Only1scoop · 07/10/2014 10:52

Unless she was abusive I'd just keep my distance.

LadyLuck10 · 07/10/2014 10:55

Erm yes if your child was keep bumping repeatedly then she was fine to shout at him. How is she supposed to know about his autism?

WooWooOwl · 07/10/2014 10:58

Without seeing the accident, and hearing exactly what you are classing as shouting, it's hard to tell whether YABU.

Whether this woman was justified in telling off your child or not, I can't see what difference it would make for you to go and tell the head. The school isn't going to do anything about it unless there is an ongoing and serious problem of this woman shouting at your child for no reason.

Kewcumber · 07/10/2014 10:59

i wouldnt EVER shout at my own child let alone anyone else's

You might not but she obviously would. What exactly was she shouting "Mind his head!" or was she effing and blinding?

Still not sure what you think the head will do - time out?

ILovePud · 07/10/2014 11:02

I'd be miffed if someone else shouted at my child (shouted - not just told off) for accidently bumping into their child. It sounds OTT, especially as she shouted at you too but had it turned into a row between you two mums by this point? I think unless she was really screaming or was threating or swearing then I'd just keep my distance, I don't see what good telling the head would do.

WorraLiberty · 07/10/2014 11:07

What did she shout at your child?

How did she end up shouting at you?

What did she shout at you?

Original poster
squidge08 · 07/10/2014 11:07

i was locking his scooter up he was with my friend who is also a mum at the school and from what i am aware it was unjustified and to shout at me instead of talking to me like a civilised person is out of order in itself

OP posts: