To ask if anyone HASN'T done the whole Santa and Tooth Fairy thing?

[mrsHawk1ns]

Not saying I won't with my DS's once they're old enough, but was just interested to see if there is anyone out there who hasn't done it, and just been honest from the start that they don't exist?!

I'm another who tells our son (recently turned 4) the truth about Father Christmas. Not the 'IT'S A LIE' truth but 'it's a fun game where people like to pretend he's real'. As we've told him it's a game I don't anticipate him 'spoiling' it for other people. And I resent the suggestion (which I've had in real life) that we are wrong to make a choice for our child just because you've decided something different. Christmas is still lots of fun for us and him.

I spoke to a friend the other day whose son must be about 10 and he had asked her if FC was real and before she had a chance to answer (she was going to tell the truth) he continued to say 'because I think he is' so she left it. Now isn't there a risk he'll feel like a total berk with his friends when he finds out?

We haven't reached teeth falling out yet but I expect we'll take the same approach.

Me,I wasn't brought up believing FC was anything more than a nice story about helping people based on a real person. The tooth fairy was a nice story and really you're mum left you some money. Easter bunny didn't even register as it wasn't something we ever did and I never did it with ds,we just did egg hunts in fact we still do even though he's 13

I completely agree with saucy jack's earlier post-does anyone tell their kids cartoon characters are real? Does it spoil their innocence if they know it's not real?

And FC is definitely pervy, even at 4 I realised that, really gave me the heebee geebees!

How the heck is he pervy? Santa popped down our chimney, left the presents, drank a whiskey and a stout and left. Drink driver? Yes. Perv? No.

Your parents may have not 'lied' to you about Santa but they seem to have given you some very odd hang-ups!

And Christmas in our house isn't about who brings your presents.

We still have stockings, even my 65 year old mum

Squoosh in our house he gets a sherry and a mince pie. How on earth does he cope if every house leaves him something?

He has Baileys and Christmas cake here

Didn't anyone teach him about mixing drinks?

Well he is quite rotund. My kids figure he shares it with the elves and takes some stuff home. Last year they left out a glass of milk, a fruit juice and a glass of port to see which he preferred (he liked the port best).

That must be why he only works one day a year, as soon as Dec 26th rolls around he needs a liver transplant and a triple bypass.

Greedy lump.

And what about the reindeer and all those carrots? My DS reckons they need them all to see really well in the dark.

Do really do tooth fairy as ds not bothered. We just have one Santa present and he knows the rest are from his family.

Low-rent department store Santas are potentially pervy, or were in the 70s and early 80s, when I last encountered them personally - all that 'come and sit on my knee' stuff, slightly soggy cotton wool beards, bad breath, and for some reason their elves were always teenage girls in green tights and very short 'sexy elf' costumes.

And I have photographic evidence that on at least two occasions, my sister and I sat on the knee of a Santa wearing what looks like red PVC...

The difference between sharing FC with your children and teaching them religion is that with FC you are presenting as fact something you believe to be fiction, whereas with Jesus you are presenting as fact something you believe to be fact.

DH and I had no idea where to start with a FC game/story/lie, so we never did. Around the tricky age, DC1 asked why other children got presents from FC when he didn't. We replied that we had so many people to bring presents (we were overwhelmed, in fact - he is not only our pfb but the pfGS on both sides) that we didn't need FC as well. That satisfied him; now at six he's cool with the idea that other families like to pretend FC is real rather than a fun story.

I really loathe it when people use FC as a disciplinary tool from about September. Learn some proper parenting and stop equating gifts with love.

Typing 'creepy Santa' into google images reveals a treasure trove of creepy delights.

When I was little I kept asking where exactly Santa's elves were spying. Then I decided to do all my naughty things in the bathroom. Like unroll the toilet paper roll.

My parents did the whole "Kids that don't believe in Santa don't get presents". We just pretended to keep believing to get gifts, and it just became an unspoken thing as we got older. My parents still put gifts under the tree from Santa.

It's harmless fun and doesn't do them any harm when they learn the truth.

My parents didn't do the Santa thing with me and I always found Christmas a magical time. Mum used to say that she wanted me to know that the presents I got were from people who loved me, she doesn't like other people taking credit . We have told our kids that Santa and the tooth fairy are real, mainly because DH wanted to. One of my kids always asks why Santa is so inconsistent in the cost and size of the presents he buys children in different families though and why the tooth fairy pays different rates and I have never come up with an adequate response.

I notice a lot of people who did grow up being told FC was real, talk a lot about the negativity that happens when they learned he wasn't, i.e. 'the magic is over', children being sad and wishing they still believed, no longer getting stocking presents etc.

I just wanted to point out, that none of that negative stuff happens if you are brought up from the start that its just a fun make-believe (as I was). I was never disappointed, never felt I'd missed out on anything or that something magical had gone. Christmas was and is amazing and wonderful.

I can't even remember when it was thatI realised Santa wasn't real. No trauma, no tears here.

No trauma here either.

We have never 'done' or 'not done' FC with DS (4.5). He has been to grottos and enjoyed 'the night before Christmas', watched Xmas versions of Peppa Pig etc and had long discussions at Nursery.

He seems to view it as a story, getting fully involved and engaged, but not believing it is real. Same as books, or TV, or when he begs me to tell him the elaborate tales of what the cat does while we are out (parties, baking, painting, all followed by frantic and just-in-time cleaning up). He knows it is just a story, but that doesn't stop him ore looking for floury paw prints on the table or pair on the tip of her tail!

Sorry don't think I was clear in previous post.

I wasn't saying 'if kids believe FC is real there will be trauma when they find out there isn't so don't do it'.

I was trying to say 'even if you/your kids found learning FC wasn't real sad-making, that doesn't mean that kids brought up without believing FC will have sad non-magical Christmases.'

I am childless. I would have told my children that Santa is something other people believe in, but we do not. I would have encouraged them to share this at school and such.
After all, we spend much time as a society warning about stranger danger, but then encourage them to sit in a strange man's lap because he wears a red suit.

I remember the day I found out Santa wasn't real, and I tell you what...I can still remember feeling so upset.

My parents drummed it into me that he was absolutely real...which don't get me wrong was so exciting. But then one year they used the same wrapping paper for Xmas as they did for my birthday and I was heartbroken.

We too play the game, they believe in Santa, but I don't big it up I you see what I mean.