AIBU: MNHQ's thoughts and what you can do

[RowanMumsnet]

Hello there

We've seen a fair number of posts recently about AIBU, and specifically about whether there's a problem in terms of some posters being gratuitously aggressive, even if the posts aren't particularly guideline-breaking in any other way.

We've done some careful monitoring of AIBU over the last couple of weeks and... We agree. Quite a few threads in AIBU do seem to veer off into a pointlessly unpleasant direction with very little provocation.

So from now on, we're going be looking out for posters who seem to put the boot in a bit too readily, and we'll be dropping them "polite mails" asking them to draw their horns in a bit. (And then if they carry on, we'll take further action.)

We'll also remove the text from the header about AIBU not being a fight club, because it's possible that this was (perversely) prompting people to think it was a fight club.

We'd really, really like to enlist your help in making AIBU a more pleasant and constructive place to post.

First off, please don't feel you have wait for an MNHQ response: the MN forums are what you, collectively, make of them, and you can set the tone. If you think an OP is being rounded on, go on and post - and say (without making personal attacks) if you think other posts have crossed a line in terms of meanness or aggression. (Feel free to refer posters back to this thread!)

But also, please report. Not necessarily because you think a post is deletable, but if you think a poster could do with getting one of our polite mails.

To be completely clear: AIBU is exactly the same as all the other topics on Mumsnet, and the same rules apply. Ideally, we want MN to be a place where people can discuss, share, entertain each other, and seek advice and support. It's not a place for posters to take lumps out of each other for no reason, and with no intention of offering constructive/interesting/funny input.

Thanks,
MNHQ

BeerTricks Consistent and fair Moderation is the only thing that will sort it out and sorry, MNHQ, but you don't do that very well at all.

Absolutely nail on head there. Without this, nothing will ever be sorted out. The inconsistency is almost comical at times, but mostly totally exasperating.

If you want to RTFT and see all the OPs posts. Customise and put 1000 threads per page and it much easier the scroll down and pick out the highlighted threads. Less Grrrr than constant page turning.

Sorry if this is sucking eggs and all that.

We all know who Jane Parker is . That's why we NEED a hide poster function.

Some posters are continually offensive but clever enough to shy away from personal attacks. I mean some posters away with comments that state SAHM are more likely to abuse their children because they are not professionals. Yes really! I have screen shots.

First time I've heard of JaneParker, clearly I've not missed pearls of wisdom...

Not seen her either and have actually managed to RTFT ! Well enough to get the nasty gist and GUTTED! Janeparker says 5/5" women should be 8-10 stone. I am 4/11" and 8 and a half! Snakes and bastards I will have to leave those 6 magnums in the freezer a bit longer! And not the mini ones either

My excuse is a sedentary job but all that fat is around my tummy.......thoroughly depressed now.

Ethical

<

That's me.

Care to share maryz?

Someone very kindly Pmed me because I hadn't twigged. I really should have done but got a bit of a headache today because of the heat.

Hahaha! Cheers Maryz

Mintyy, do we know that for sure? I mean, I suspected she was, but thought I was the only one!

Oh I hate mysteries

I understand why it can't be said though!

Thanks for that, Mintyy I wouldn't have known until I saw JP posting on the subject of earning £millions while balancing a baby on each hip and maintaining a pelvic floor of sprung steel.

And foraging for nuts.

She must have a tardis.

If someone says they are fat and feel well and healthy and energetic they are just stating how their life is, not inviting a lot of slating and saying she should be size 6. Isn't she just saying it's not necessary to be thin to feel sexy and fabulous? I think Chat would have been a better arena though because AIBU is just asking for people to say YABU. I guess the topic itself sets people up to be contradicted. Maybe just get rid of AIBU altogether.

Definitely now I am feeling overweight thanks to MS Parker

I don't know who this Jane Parker is or was, but is it really fair to be discussing her like this, on a thread that she isn't even on?

Just seems a bit, I don't know...not right?

Worra - DarkestEyes was saying she thought JaneParker was an mra troll. I just thought she'd like to know that she isn't that's all.

Yeah I didn't just mean DarkestEyes, just the general not very positive comments about someone who isn't actively posting on this thread.

I can't see any not very nice comments, but there.

Well I've no idea.

I'm not commenting on the poster at all, but the posting of 'If' made me do a full-on lol. Actual guffaw. And I really don't do that often.

Yes it's a bit off but I'm DYING to know who it is!!!!! Can someone PM me please?

I've only commented on what she said not on her personally. I too have no idea of her or her track record.

But I suppose if she's stopped me pigging out on a Magnum then she must be ok