getting annoyed at botoxed friends getting told how young they look

[joshandjamie]

Yes, I probably am being unreasonable. And yes, I should remove my judgey pants from my overly clenched buttocks, BUT:

several of the mums from school who I hang out with have botox. And fillers. And liposuction and any other range of artificial beautifying processes beyond the normal hair, manis and make up. Each to their own. I would personally never do it because I worry about the safety side of things AND it feels like cheating.

What irritates me is that whenever they post pics of themselves on Facebook or even go out in real life, they always get loads of comments raving about how young they look, that they haven't aged a day since high school and that they're just getting more stunning by the minute. In contrast I look like the wrinkled crone in the corner.

It makes me want to yell: THAT BECAUSE THEY HAVE PUMPED THEIR FACES FULL OF BOTOX!!!

I'm going to guess that that would be unreasonable to do. (Doesn't mean I wouldn't love to do it. Just once).

I realise this makes me sound like a huge cow and I know that they are perfectly entitled to do what they like and feel good about themselves when people notice. I just think it's slightly unfair that those of us who don't 'cheat' get viewed as being old or having let themselves go, if we don't go the botox route. Am I being unreasonable to feel this way?

[londonrach]

Tbh give them 10 years and these extras age them 20 unless it's redone. Thinking Joan Collins. Losing the ability to smile is awful. It's far better to let nature takes it course. You can always tell someone correct age anyway by their eyes anyway. Wisdom appears...

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

It would wind me up too! I saw a friend had had a manicure once and had obviously had bio nails or the like and I said 'Oooo nice long nails!' And she replied 'yes, they've really grown due to the sun'

Ok love

[daisychain01]

I thought the whole reason for botox is to look younger, ergo receive comments on your youthful appearance.

It wouldn't worry me, but that's probably because I'm naturally gorgeous hahah! Hey, "beauty is but skin-deep" as my granny used to tell me.

[Kleptronic]

Well I know what you mean OP, I've got a friend who does all this, and sometimes I'm irrationally jealous about it. I'm all creased and frown-y whereas she's all startled and doe-eyed. She does look slightly over-inflated and smacked with the shiny trowel though.

[runningonwillpower]

I wait in vain for someone to ask if I've had Botox.

Not because I have, but because I like to think I look so much younger than my actual years.

i live in hope/self-delusion.

[Castlemilk]

'OMG you look great! I can't believe you look so YOUNG you haven't aged a day! Are you sure you don't have leprosy?'



Go on OP I dare you.

[flowery]

That's the whole point though isn't it? Why get annoyed?

I have gel nails. Sometimes people tell me how nice they look. Is that annoying because I'm cheating?

Oh no, I ust remembered an old friend I haven't seen for a few years told me I look so young on FB the other day. I hope she doesn't think I've been injecting myself with toxins!

[paxtecum]

It is very strange to willingly have deadly poison injected into your body.

Our bodies have to deal with so many environmental toxins that we digest and that are in the air, why would anyone load more poison into their body.

I wonder if there will be compensation in 20 years time for botox 'victims'.

Just because the botox manufacturers say it's safe, doesn't really mean it is safe.

Centuries ago women put powered lead on their faces because it was fashionable and it covered up small pox scars. They often died of lead poisoning.

[gordyslovesheep]

I'm not sure why you care enough to be irked by it though - I have a fair few friends who get a little extra help looks wise - many have extensions, botox, false nails, false eyelashes, perm make up, fake tan

me I cultivate a careful dragged through a hedge backwards meets 40+ mad cat woman look

but we are friends - I adore them - they make me laugh and I like their company - so their looks have cock all to do with it and I wouldn't dream of commenting

One of my mates has just got a modeling contract age 46 she is amazing

[Gubbins]

I know a couple of people who use Botox and have had work done and it's immediately obvious to anyone who sees them. When people congratulate them on looking young it's because they know it's taken considerable financial outlay. It the same as saying "ooh, love your hair" to someone who's just had a haircut. It's just the done thing, no one means it. People who have Botox don't look younger, they just look botoxed.

[Shockers]

It is hard when invisibility strikes. I used to get the occasional admiring glance... now, nothing. I can see why people resist this invisible status, but it ain't for me.

DH was looking in disbelief at a woman who's face looked completely plastic the other day... she clocked him and clearly thought his stunned look was one of appreciation (probably because she hadn't heard him say, "Why on earth would anyone CHOOSE to look like that?") and gave him a flirty smirk of sorts... which was no mean feat and made her look as though she was chewing a particularly resistant toffee.

[CaptainTrollolololol]

Some people will mean it. Someone I know has had work done. It's obvious they are fake boobies but she looks amazing. I'm not complimenting the money if I said to her that she looks nice. I'd be complimenting her. This thread has just turned into a bitch at the Botox thread. It's the exact same as reassuring a fat friend that they don't look fat.

[WorraLiberty]

I would personally never do it because I worry about the safety side of things AND it feels like cheating.

I'm interested to know what you mean by 'cheating', OP?

Do you see it as a competition?

[ThatBloodyWoman]

It hadn't even crossed my mind that some of the younger looking mums may have had botox.

Don't really care -my wrinkles tell a story of a life enjoying the outdoors, and spending time having fun rather than sitting in a beauty parlour.

I've never even had a facial, but I don't consider my wrinkled face to make me any less attractive than anothers less wrinkled face.

[SlicedAndDiced]

Shockers

I've got the giggles imagining that.

[bauhausfan]

Both my sisters have had cosmetic surgery - eye lifts, tummy tucks, bingo wing tucks, botox and teeth whitened. It pisses me off as I am older anyway so now I look doubly old!! It does annoy that other people will just look at the 3 of us and think that Bauhaus is the ugly one who has aged badly.

[ApocalypseThen]

Wow. I can't believe how nasty and judgemental some of you are. Yeah, comfort yourself that these women may look worse in ten years if you like, but if you can't sort out your mean streak you'll look worse too.

Most of all, you really need to think about why you think it's cheating you out of something if someone else does what they like with their own face or body. It doesn't harm you, and you haven't been banned yourself.

[stopgap]

I've spent the last eleven years living in Botox and plastic surgery central (NYC) and on average I would say that having Botox automatically makes you look 44, whether you're actually 34 or 54. I don't think it makes someone look younger, and I know people who've been to top, top plastic surgeons. I think it has a weird homogenising effect.

[SanityClause]

I have a frown line which I really dislike, and a few years ago, I went to a clinic to ask about filler.

She suggested at Botox would be better. She then started to sell it, tellinme that she had Botox, and she didn't look scary. I looked at her, and realised, actually, a 40-odd year old woman with perfectly smooth skin did look a bit scary.

So, I felt much better about my frown line, and have not been tempted again.

[YouTheCat]

Oh no,stopgap! I am 44. Will people think I've had botox?

[ThatBloodyWoman]

I just truly do not understand the urge to look artificially younger.
And I would always choose a wrinkly face over an overplump yet smooth one, personally.
I'll go as far as saying that I find some wrinkly faces can be quite beautiful - like a gnarly old oak tree.

[AndSheRose]

Well I agree it cheating. And yes it is a competition. Women in our society are hugely judged by their appearance and age comes into it a lot too. Hence Botox users are serving that prejudice making it more entrenched, whilst also getting to look younger in that context, so it is hard on the rest of us!
If we were in a culture which respected beauty as not an age-dependent quality (more like France, Italy etc), it wouldn't be happening. Instead, one has the choice of buying into a shallow and unpleasant method of trying to hide your age or having your self-worth increasingly attacked because you don't.
So YANBU, it is a feminist issue.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Stopgap-I agree, it makes people 'look like they have had some thing done' not younger at all.

I keep noticing celebs with frozen foreheads seem to have very wrinkly eye lids. It's like the lids have to work and over compensate. Katy Price and Lauren Pope spring to mind.

[superstarheartbreaker]

Horrid thread about ageing of women....ugggrrr. We are all going to get old but if we don't want to it gracefully then who cares?

[cardibach]

Manicures are normal? I had one today as a treat...
OP I think you may be mixing with the wrong people. I don't know anyone who has had any sort of cosmetic procedure beyond the (very) occasional facial or manicure! We all look our ages here - and I think are better for it.