to be uncomfortable with a naked incontinent toddler?

[prudenceprude]

We visited family yesterday. Their two yo dd stripped off after dinner, pooed on the floor and then ran around naked for the rest of the afternoon.

Their house, their rules and I would never have said anything but we are contemplating not visiting for a while.

They made no attempt to dress her and found it hilarious. My 11yo ds1 was mortified, I was more worried about the hygiene factor.

Aibu and a prude? I'm generally very laid back but felt really uncomfortable. I'd be fine with naked kids in the paddling pool in the garden, for eg, or just out of the bath for a run around, but stripping off after dinner, shutting under the table and then spending the afternoon flollopping about naked with no attempt to dress her or even put pants on her made me feel a bit queasy.

Is it me?

[allhailqueenmab]

Sounds like they are trying to potty train the 2 year old and are having more luck, in general, when naked, although unfortunately not in this case with the shit on the floor incident.

They obviously think you are closer than you feel. I can imagine in warm weather thinking that a naked, potty-using 2 year old was ok with family, especially if it is a means to an end (helping them progress to being properly potty-trained). They obviously think of you as quasi-family and you don't feel the same way. Fair enough.

The shit under the table may have been a total aberration and surprised and horrified the parents - but they didn't let on because being appalled about children's poo can give them hang ups

[Floggingmolly]

In the garden, fine; indoors it's definitely pants on. Who wants to sit on chairs where a toddlers who has apparently just pooed under the table bum has been? I don't.

[Marcipex]

I'm not surprised you felt uncomfortable. It's not appropriate behaviour in a room full of guests.
What's wrong with them putting pants on? Or preferably, more than just pants. It doesn't inhibit play to have a minimum of clothes on.

[prudenceprude]

If they had an incontinent puppy at dinner I would have been revolted and I would have left.

Vom.

[prudenceprude]

We are family, by the way, but even so.

[melika]

YANBU

[Notcontent]

I think outdoors, in the garden, absolutely fine.

Indoors I would not expose guests to it, mainly for hygiene reasons! If the naked toddler does a poo or wee, and then decides to climb into the lap of one of the guests... Well, you get the picture...

[ZenNudist]

I wouldn't bat an eyelid but wouldn't let my own child run around naked in such circs. It wouldn't stop me visiting.

Re pooing i just feel sorry for the family. We've been lucky that ds1 (3) always been very good only poos on toilet. But just yesterday he wet his pants then bounced around on my cream fabric sofa. I was , but it's just life. I would hope no one would judge me / him.

If you only have dd(11) them yabu to be so unsympathetic, and also should be teaching your dd some sympathy too.

[MorningTimes]

Randall - I said 'cavorting', what on earth is wrong with that word?!

[EhricLovesTheBhrothers]

Yanbu
She shat on the floor then flolloped all around with no wash or nappy put on? Grim.
I must also be weird because I don't like getting an eyeful of the genitals of other people's children unless there is a reason, like bath time or getting changed. I can't really articulate why but that's it. I wouldn't let my DS be naked on the beach for example.

[saintlyjimjams]

My parents puppy did a poo under our table while we were eating. Far worse than a toddler poo in terms of smell & size but found it amusing rather than horrific. I didn't have to clean it up, let that to my dad. Mind you with a severely disabled child my son was toilet trained far later than 2 so I'm not really feeling the horror of a two year old doing what two year olds do.

[x2boys]

The pooing aside I have always found dressing small children that don't want to be dressed pointless with my two I can dress them and within five minutes they have undressed themselves more so the little one now.

[LuvMyBoyz]

YANBU

[prudenceprude]

My 11yo is a boy, entering puberty and getting all squirm about nudity. My nine year old Dd and toddler ds are happy to be naked, it's just his age.

I'm really not highly strung about nudity, I just thought it was inappropriate in these circs.

[claraschu]

I do think you are a bit fussy if you don't want to visit family because of this. I would let my toddler run around naked inside if there were just family and close friends there. Toilet training toddlers have accidents sometimes. It is not a big deal. I would put a nappy on if I thought people were bothered or the toddler was likely to have an accident.

Have you never visited friends with a (not fully housetrained) puppy or a litter of puppies? If you like dogs, you have missed a lot of fun.

[x2boys]

Yes jimjams I,m with you on that my son is four next month he is autistic and non verbal he has just started occasionally weeing occasionally on the toilet but I can't see him being fully toilet trained any time soon.

[badidea]

YABU - kids that age like to be naked, you need to choose your fights with toddlers - manhandling them into clothes in case visitors get offended is a fight I'd opt out of (very low priority IMO).

If you don't like it - don't go.

The poohing incident is not ideal, but hey, she's 2 - it happens, you clean it up and don't make an issue out of it.

I can't believe the posters who are uncomfortable around naked 2 year olds - what a sad society we live in.

[peggyundercrackers]

Yanbu - I would have found it disgusting too. I can deal with my own shit and my dds shit but I don't really want to deal with some one else's whilst I'm eating. Would not have minded the nudity if the child was toilet trained but if they weren't I would expect a nappy at the very least. I would let my own run about in have house naked and sitting on all the furniture after having a shit, I don't do that so I wouldn't expect someone else to do it.

[RandallFloyd]

It's a word that has connotations I wouldn't associate with a toddler, simple as that.

[Fakebook]

Yanbu.

I really don't believe anyone who would be ok with a shitting and pissing naked toddler running around. I certainly wouldn't be ok. It's actually quite off putting and disrespectful to guests. Why do people think its ok for naked children to run around infront of guests? Yes it's "natural", but we're not animals are we. We're humans. Do what you want at home alone with your "pack", but don't expose guests to it.

[piscivorous]

I'm with you on this and am surprised at how many people think it's ok. It is fine for toddlers to be naked when it is hot, when they are in and out of paddling pools or when it is just families at home but I would not be happy when there are visitors there who might be embarrassed by it.

Poo happens but I agree, if she is not able to control it in company she should have nappy or pants.

I think you have to put your son first and if visiting will make him feel uncomfortable then don't go for a while

[beeny]

Its not you

[RandallFloyd]

If the child were 'weeing and pooing all afternoon' I would agree that, in company, nappies would be preferable. But the OP only mentions one accident so I took her at her word.

A naked toddler who had one accident wouldn't bother me in the slightest, a bit grim but hey ho. As long as it was cleared up thoroughly and quickly, no harm done.

Shit happens. (Pun thoroughly intended)

[GoblinLittleOwl]

Pooed on the floor? Dear God!