Oh my... Your posts made me feel so sad for you that I rejoined mumsnet just to convince you that your family were treating you badly. I tell you that to try and demonstrate how startlingly bad it is.
You should not be hosting Easter Sunday for 12 or anyone else. You should be wearing your most comfortable set of clothes/pyjamas, in the most comfortable position you can find (using every cushion in the house if necessary) and watching a DVD box set. Formula feeding or not. And I dearly hope you are in front of the TV, although I fear you're not.
If your mother was really so passionate an advocate for breast-feeding, she would have been giving you practical advice on how to do it. Not making you feel shit for not! I get the impression they're only about the judgment. If you did actually want to breast-feed (for yourself not because your mother and grandmother are being right vine weevils about it), then your mother should be enabling you to watch DVD box sets even more!
There are two important facts about breastfeeding and formula, and these two facts are inextricably linked. People with very decided, self-serving opinions will put forth one or the other, according to which supports the choice they made.
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At a populational level, breastmilk probably does have a positive effect. (But in 20 years time, no-one will be able to tell whether your child was or wasn't breastfed, because it's simply not discernible at an individual level!)
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As a direct consequence of formula's existence, the population in the developed world is larger, because formula saves babies' lives. Breast-feeding is natural, which means it's not perfect, which means sometimes it just doesn't work out. Like teeth. Teeth are natural, but how many of us haven't needed dental assistance? I know barely anyone who hasn't been saved from disgusting amounts of pain thanks to a dental procedure.
I think my twins might be included as part of number 2. They were born healthy, but small, and they were unable to feed well. I supplemented with formula in order to get them large enough to be able to stay awake long enough to feed! If formula hadn't been around, I think life would have been a bit more terrifying, and I would have been relying on other women being able to give me expressed breastmilk at 5am. After they were two weeks old, I switched to exclusive breast-feeding, because I found it easier, but formula (and supportive midwives who actually showed me how to feed, and never would have tried to make me feel shit if I'd chosen to carry on with formula) got my babies to the point they could. (I would like to clarify that although I found breastfeeding twins easier than using formula, I do not judge any mother of multiples who finds/found it the other way round. I went with what worked for me. Whatever gets you some fucking sleep! is what I say.)
None of the above is meant to pressure you towards breast-feeding, OP, just in case it comes across that way. As far as I'm concerned, the important things are that:
a) your baby is fed, cuddled and changed,
b) you get to rest.
I am so sorry that your family aren't helping you to do (b). YANBU to be upset by this.