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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU...DP and London

221 replies

Bazoo23 · 12/02/2014 15:16

I have recently started a new job and as part of this job I have to attend a training day in London.
We live about 5 hours from London. My employer will pay my train fare and I just assumed my partner would come with me.
However when I got the date through it falls week after we are away for a week.
My DP said hed be pushing his luck to ask for a day off so soon and wont even try.
AIBU to feel hurt that he doesnt seem worried about me goig alone? We are from a very small town and I am really nervous of being alone im a big city. Im also worried about travelling back in the evening.
I feel like it will be so obvious I have no clue what Im doing that I will be an easy target :-(

OP posts:
Shakey1500 · 12/02/2014 19:52

If you're worried about being "a target" the biggest tip I had (when I moved to London from the back of beyond) was...

"Always look like you know where you're going, even if you don't"

It inspires confidence that you are local and not a lost gawping/ potential gullible tourist.

Gruntfuttock · 12/02/2014 19:55

I was going shopping in London on my own at the age of 12. At 16 I left home and moved there living in a hostel ON MY OWN. Good grief.

OP, at your age my daughter flew to New York, then got a train from JFK airport to Grand Central Station in Manhattan. Got a train ticket to Philadelphia which involved changing at a station in New Jersey. That year she had also been to Paris and Rome. She did all those journeys ON HER OWN.

Original poster
Bazoo23 · 12/02/2014 20:00

Thanks for the app tip, amazing!

OP posts:
CantEvenKeepAnOrchidAlive · 12/02/2014 20:01

I can't believe so many of you are Shock at someone not feeling comfortable travelling somewhere they've never been before. You should meet my friend...nearly 26 and has to get her sister to phone on her behalf to book appointments. That includes doctors, hair cuts etc. She's a fully functioning adult who holds down a job, a house, a decent relationship but ask her to sort something for herself..nah. Can't ring for taxi's even.

If you told her she needed to go London on her own for a day, I think she would have a total breakdown. Some people just aren't çut out for it if it's out of the realms of day to day life.

nkf · 12/02/2014 20:03

You'll be fine. Honestly. London is full of perfectly normal people. And you won't be the only out of towner. Major tourist destination and all that.

Tenementfunster · 12/02/2014 20:09

Wow such vitriol on someone who is a bit apprehensive about travelling to a big city.
Does an arsehole klaxon sound when such a thread is posted?
Really edifying stuff

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 12/02/2014 20:10

Bazoo I'm local London all my life. I'm happy to go RL with you and help you plan the trip, where to go etc if you need it and be on moby for a chat if you get scared. I can't meet you - 2 kids but I can help you.

Ill pm you.

Original poster
Bazoo23 · 12/02/2014 20:13

For every spiteful post there have been two lovely supportive ones which I really do appreciate!
And yes I was BU about my partner. He just wants a quiet life bless him :-)

OP posts:
SnowDaze · 12/02/2014 20:27

YellowTulips are you sure you aren't my ex? He liked to belittle me and call me names 'for my own good'.

That's not helping someone 'woman up'.

nkf · 12/02/2014 20:32

This is yet another example of AIBU being used for the wrong purpose. And poor OP has taken that side of it on board. Take it over to travel. Your real problem is your cheapskate company. That is a long journey.

PicaK · 12/02/2014 20:38

Do try a pret a manger sandwich while you're there! Take hankieshankies or tissues for the black snot.

candycoatedwaterdrops · 12/02/2014 20:39

Lord above, some of you are spiteful arseholes aren't you?

OP, good luck with your journey.

Alisvolatpropiis · 12/02/2014 20:40

Hunt out Dirty Burger op!

As I said in my previous post, you will be fine. Smile

nkf · 12/02/2014 20:43

No. No. Itsu.

Alisvolatpropiis · 12/02/2014 20:46

Itsu for burgers?

nkf · 12/02/2014 20:49

Er no.

Original poster
Bazoo23 · 12/02/2014 20:55

Ooh! I wonder if Ill spot a Nandos? We dont have one (or anything else) and it sounds delicous!

OP posts:
Alisvolatpropiis · 12/02/2014 20:55

Nkf

I did wonder

coffeeinbed · 12/02/2014 20:57

You'll be fine OP, Oyster card topped up, TFL app on the phone, stay near the doors in the carriages, just touch in and out, don't block the entrance.

Think of all the tourists and foreign people who use it everyday and don't even speak the language.

ohfourfoxache · 12/02/2014 20:57

Bazoo you're not missing much - honest!

haveyourselfashandy · 12/02/2014 21:04

God,there's some sad sad bastards on here haha and you have dealt with them well OP.You will be fine,research your journey once you know where you are training.Good luck and enjoy it!

EBearhug · 12/02/2014 21:12

It is scary if you've grown up in a small town and never been before. But you will be okay, once you know where you have to go.

The tube maps are easy to work out where you're going, and at every tube station, there's a map on the wall near the door, so you can work out where you are and which direction to go in. Have you got a map app on your phone? Or you can get an A-Z. You'll be fine.

coffeeinbed · 12/02/2014 21:14

And don't be afraid to ask for directions.
You will get help.

nkf · 12/02/2014 21:19

No to Nandos. It's just posh KFC.

Itsaboatjack · 12/02/2014 21:23

Sorry haven't read the full thread (it was all getting a bit nasty), so don't know if it's been said already but get the Citymapper app for you phone, very useful for getting around.