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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel furious with childminder in hairdresser...

215 replies

flatwhite · 11/12/2013 13:45

Having my hair cut at local salon. Sat at sink having hair washed. Little boy about 21/2 yrs sitting strapped in buggy facing me. Surrounded by a few toys(on sofa by buggy) and holding a little book and reading to self.
I assumed mum had gone to toilet (or would be back in a minute) and I started interacting with child whilst head back having hair washed.
Child smiled at me and held out book
As if he wanted to be read to.
Hair washer asked if I wNted him to beloved closer to me (obv assuming he was mine)
I Said he was not my child but remarked I good he was sitting on his own and amusing self given young age.
A lady then sat back and peeped head out from her seat where she was having hair done. She smiled and I asked if this was her son. I also said "it breaks my heart that he is not protesting to sitting on his own"
She smiled back and tolde she was his childminder "and not to speak too soon"
Then went back to getting hair done.
I felt rather sad (i admit even tearful) I am a bit of a softie given I am mum of 2 boys age 3 and 7M and still breatfeeding DS2. So poss set off my hormones.
But is it unreasonable to feel angry with this woman. If she was mum it would be bad enough - ok to bring child to salon but at least seat him so you can talk to him not so he us facing awY from you and all alone. But she is being paid to look after this child.
I haven't said anything as prob not appropriate and not fair on child to make minder cross but finding experience difficult!

OP posts:
CalamitouslyWrong · 12/12/2013 09:50

But jelly tots, the OP didn't just keep her feelings to herself and then confess on MN. She told the CM about them. That's the really strange bit.

I don't actually find going to the hairdressers in any way relaxing, regardless of the ages of everyone else in the shop. It's an assault on the senses (noisy, full of smells, etc), the entire process is quite intrusive yet public, and you have to make polite chit chat while completely unable to see because you've got your glasses off. It's not that much unlike a visit to the dentist/dental hygienist, except that you get more privacy while they poke about in your mouth. Grin

HaroldTheGoat · 12/12/2013 11:42

Fancy saying to someone though. Insinuating the child was obviously left alone all the time which is what OP did.

differentnameforthis · 12/12/2013 12:07

I think it's hard to describe if you are not here. Child leaning forward clearly wanting me to play with him and I'm A stranger

I think you will find that a lot of children this age would willingly interact with strangers. I don't see the harm in that.

drspouse · 12/12/2013 12:17

Our DS went into town in the buggy with his CM the other day. He got to see the Christmas lights (which he can't do at nursery). I wonder if, shock horror, she went into a shop and did some of her own shopping.

TheToysAreALIVEITellThee · 12/12/2013 12:40

Op if the sight of a child quite content and in no way being harmed made you sad and tearful and say inappropriate things to a total stranger then, in the nicest possible way, maybe you need to see your GP?

PND hit me about 6 months after DS1 was born and I cried buckets at the sight of two pigeons sitting next to each other in my back garden Blush

MiaowTheCat · 12/12/2013 13:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pictish · 12/12/2013 13:26

Ha ha! Grin

Gileswithachainsaw · 12/12/2013 13:33

:o

JollySantersSelectionBox · 12/12/2013 13:42

I want a Sanctimommy Bingo pen!

Are they selling them as MN merchandise? On the shelf next to the rotating Heli-copter parent arms?

blueberryupsidedown · 12/12/2013 13:49

Also, technically, she might not be a registered childminder but a friend or family and had to do a last minute favour. I'm a childminder and tomorrow is my day off, but one parent asked me to look after their boy as she has to work overtime. She knows that I will have to a) take her son with me to argos b) take her son with me to see my son's Nativity play at school. I understand that it can make you feel emotional (I used to cry reading 'some dogs do' to my son when I was pregnant with DS2) but you shouldn't jump to conclusion that the childminder is rubbish at her job or that the child is 'neglected'.

Crowler · 12/12/2013 14:05

I cried buckets at the sight of two pigeons sitting next to each other in my back garden

LOL. As in, it's so nice that they found each other? Or as in, these filthy pigeons will be soon reproducing in my back garden?

TheToysAreALIVEITellThee · 12/12/2013 14:32

Yes, as in it was so lovely that they had each other and they looked so happy, one of them had its head on the others shoulder and they were just leaning against each other. i saw them quite a lot.

I cried even more when the next day only one of them was there :(

monicalewinski · 12/12/2013 14:36

I'm sorry Toys, but I just lol'd at you crying buckets over the pigeons (I have had pnd too, so not taking the piss - but I did laugh, sorry). Are you ok around pigeons now? Blush.

Miaow - I'm gagging for a sanctimommy bingo pen, where can I get one? Grin

monicalewinski · 12/12/2013 14:38

Oh no! xpost Toys, just seen that they were in love and then one left - now you've made my throat catch. I am on an emotional rollercoaster today Sad

pictish · 12/12/2013 16:24

A Sanctimommy bingo pen? Shut up and take my money! Grin

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