To not lie to the dr as instructed by dh.

[Youcanbesneezyimnotdopey]

Dh is clearly being an unreasonable arse.

He suffers from hayfever. Normally he gets it on prescription as it is so expensive over the counter and he gets through a lot of it. It costs nearly £20 to buy over the counter. He has recently moved to my dr's surgery, previously he was still at the one where he lived before and his mother used to get the prescription and pay for the charge.

I suffer from a long term medical condition which entitles me to free prescriptions. So he wants me to go and lie to the dr and get the hayfever stuff so we don't have to pay. I have refused. This morning he said to me to go to the chemist to get his hayfever stuff and I said ok if he gave me the money (I'm a poor sahm, he earns 70k+ a year). He refused and said I could pay as its my own fault for refusing to get him free prescriptions.

I will not do this a) because its just plain wrong, b) because I've never had hayfever in my life and it'll probably look odd of I suddenly develop so badly I need eye drops, nose drops and antihistamines and c) because I have quite enough on my medical record without anything else.

I'm not being unreasonable am I?! He is not very pleased but in all honestly he is a bit of a bulky sometimes and I think he thinks I will give in if he's unpleasant enough.

My husband has to take anti histamines every day, we have to pay full price where we live (Cyprus) and they are are very expensive and only packs of 10 or 20 which is useless. For a few years now we have been buying from the internet and have them delivered from chemistdirect. Very cheap. Works out less than the prescription charge in UK.
The unreasonable ass could do this for himself. YANBU.

Agree with posters on the hay fever meds reacting with yours. Tell him a move to Scotland would be good for his business. Prescriptions are free for everyone in Scotland. :)

Tell him to get a prepayment certificate. Only £10 per month.
Plus as others have said fyou should have proper access to money. Bet you don't even get child benefit.

Boots currently have a buy one, get one half price offer. Their own brand (which I use and it's fine) hay fever tablets are .99p for seven day supply. Tell him to bulk buy and leave you out of it.

You would be better off using the time from the doctors appointment to see a solicitor. This guy is a bullying, financially abusive, controlling wanker.

Why are you putting up with him being unpleasant at all?

This. 70 k as a household income means you are rich, not poor. Do you seriously not have access to this money

No. No access to any other cash.

Dh argues re prescription that he pays enough tax so it's about time he got something back.
Nope, still not going to do it. We do get something back, we get my medications which if we had to pay for would cost quite a lot!

I'm looking for a job at the moment for when ds starts school so hopefully I will get some financial independence then. Although it may be that I will volunteer somewhere first to try to make myself vaguely employable. I'm not deluding myself that anyone will be racing to employ a 30 year old woman who hasn't been in work for four years.

He sounds vile. Seriously, why are you with him?

Never lie to your doctor! I'm honestly lost for words, but HE is definetly being unreasonable! And i'm concerned that he earns £70+k a year but you're a poor sahm, does he not share his income with you?

Supermarket antihistamines are cheaper than a prescription and just as good for most people. You can buy most of the nasal sprays and eye drops over the counter too, or he can get them on a prepayment certificate.
You don't want an allergic illness you haven't got on your medical record.
He sounds a horrible self centred bully.

Christ, I can get my antihistamines for £2.30 for two week's supply. Eye drops, £4.70 for a month's worth. Nasal spray £4.25. Tesco own. OTC at the Tesco Pharmacy.

HIBU. And as for not giving you the money - if he doesn't give you the money, he doesn't get his meds. Simple as.

Let HIM sort it out. Either HE goes to the GP for them, or he pays.

You should NOT lie and defraud the NHS. You are in the right. He is an entitled arse.

Does he always treat you with such contempt, like you are just there to do his bidding or 'suffer the consequences' ?!

I would NOT put up with that, and I wouldn't be buying him the fucking medicine. He would either give me the money to buy it, go and buy it himself, or he would go without his meds.

I'm on your behalf!!

Your 'D'H is an arse.

But for the hayfever stuff, he needs Chemist Direct where it's about £1 for a month's supply of generic tablets (depending on which prescription he has). I get Cetirizine which is the same as Zirtek, which costs about £5 for a whole summer's supply.

At the person who said they would be rubbing his pillow on the grass as soon as he left the house!

YANBU at all.
People who can afford to pay for treatment and don't (your OH) are absolute and utter wankers.
He is asking you to steal.

Are you married to my ex H? Trust me, LTB, what you describe is not fair, or normal.

I will tell him about the places to get the stuff cheaper.
I couldn't remember exactly how much it was, I know I bought it for him once or twice last year when he had run out and I think I remember paying about £17 pounds. I know one thing was nearly £10 on its own but can't remember if that was the eye or nose drops. Think it might have been the nose drops.

He is a bully and there's no doubt in my mind that he's got worse since I became dependent on him. He is also particularly unreasonable when it comes to spending money on anything, ever. I know it makes sense to save as much as possible but dh doesn't like to spend even when it's something essential.

did you get that bit about finacial abuse? go look at it carefully.

And WTF is all this 'he' gets £70k pa and you are a 'poor' SAHM.

Bollocks. You have £70k as a family.

You being a SAHM means that there are no childcare costs. YOU enable him to earn £70k pa without having up pay childcare costs!!

Joint account or LTB, I'm afraid.

Don't make yourself financially reliant on a man who looks to be financially abusive. And emotionally abusive if you ask me - because it IS emotional abuse up behave like this towards you simply because you won't lie to your GP.

And you can tell him from me that the GP wouldn't automatically prescribe you the drugs that he has - for starters if you are bf, then most antihistamines are a no-no. And even if not, as far as your GP is concerned, your 'hay fever' would have only just started, so he would not prescribe you the nasal spray and eye drops, only an antihistamine.

And of you are in my PCT, they won't prescribe antihistamines anyway. They don't prescribe things that cost less than the prescription charge, even for those that would usually get those items for free. So no antihistamines, no hydrocortisone cream, no nit lotion, no calpol, no urine dip sticks for diabetics, no GF food, blah blah blah.

He's an arse!

He sounds like a total wanker. As others have said, I urge you to read the information on financial abuse. You should never feel that HE has x amount of money and you have none because you're the SAHP. Your household income is there to provide for everyone, not just him, and it's not ok for him to just give you a paltry amount of pocket money. Neither is it ok for him to demand that you commit fraud and then emotionally blackmail you when you refuse!

YANBU and LTB

You NEED to continue to claim child benefit. It covers you for your NI contributions. If you do not have enough NI contributions, you won't get a state pension.

YOU put in a new claim for the Child Benefit. HE has to declare it on his tax return. Then the DWP deduct it from his wages.

Fuck him and his financial abuse.

I don't often say this, but you and him need a SERIOUS talk about shared finances. And if he doesn't agree, then I think you should LTB.

Hayfever is the least of your problems here op.

Why are you poor? Sorry don't understand your relationship.

"Dh argues re prescription that he pays enough tax so it's about time he got something back. hmm"

Grrrr. That's not what we pay tax for, it's to help those who need it!

I have hayfever. So do my children. I do not use their free NHS prescription tablets: I buy my own.