To be pissed off PIL looked after baby while I was at work and left me with upset, screaming child

[Mamacj]

At work this mornin so was dh but he was with dc most of time. Apparently he thought pil did fab jobplayin with dc and really stimulating him. I came home to a screaming tired underfed baby who needed a full outfit change. This was one of the first times they had dc and I had left instructions which they did seem to attempt to follow. Dh can't seem to understand why I think they are useless AIBU???

Good morning all

Well Hellooooooo Dave

YABVU, PIL did you a favour and you are still moaning despite having childcare on tap so you can go out and away without your child.

Your DH should be doing far more but its hard to tell if he is lazy or you dont let him. Or perhaps given the amount of time your child is with others there simply arent many opportunities for him to do one to one care.

WTF?? Doesn't do nappy changing and you thought that was normal?!

It is so utterly and completely not normal.

Tbh I think you are doing your DC a disservice in the long run. I get the impression you have limited the time your Dh and his parents have had with your dc. They need to learn his routine, habits too. Of course your mum is going to be better in your eyes if she has had more contact. Its a learning curve. The GP/GC relationship can be as fantastic one and aI do feel it is a patents responsibility to try to build the best one possible. Give them a break, you may come to appreciate the extra break. Don't react to this setback, put effort into making it better next time. Maybe less rules, focus on one part of dcs routine for therm tho stick to.

James Martin is a bit of a player, that I DO know

I did. Still would.

I may need help.

Realises she has to be up for work in 3 ours.

Damn. It. Was. Worth. It.

Happy sigh.

Goodnight ladies.

You two are terrible. For entirely different reasons.

Morning all,

We'd like to remind you that troll hunting is against our talk guidelines. We'll be going through the thread and deleting any posts that breaks the GL.

YABU, but I do remember with my PFB it would get to me a bit when my DS was perfect and happy all day when his routine was right (ie. when he was with me!) and damn hard work, crying and irritable and not knowing what to do with himself when it was wrong (ie. when not with me).

But it was probably you not being there that threw everything out the window, not something your PIL did wrong so it's very unfair to say they are useless. And it was their first time and they did their best and tried to follow your instructions, but you not being there unsettled him so he didn't sleep as long as he usually does and he didn't eat as well as he usually does. I do understand it's frustrating when you are the person who has to deal with the overtired and irritable baby but you just have to accept that that's going to happen sometimes if you leave him with someone else.

So yes, YABU but a part of me understands your frustration because I've felt it too in the past.

Re your DH, nappies aside is he a good dad in other ways or is all of it left to you? Or are you the type of mum that just does everything herself? My brother refuses to do his DC's nappies too but in every other way he is an amazing dad and an amazing uncle to my DC. But he doesn't do nappies!

his was one of the first times they had dc and I had left instructions which they did seem to attempt to follow. Dh can't seem to understand why I think they are useless AIBU???

they are grandparents not flipping robots are you taking the piss, seriously

Blimey, Kate. You took your time!

I think you have control issues, rather than a lazy dh. He doesn't change nappies, I wonder if that's because in your eyes he can't do it right.

You lucky your pil/ mum are interested in your ds. In 20tears time you will be the position of you pil. Imaging how involved you would like to be, snd treat them that way