To find "gender competitiveness" among mums/women really disturbing?

[MmBovary]

I'm the mother of two little boys and since pregnant with my second boy, I started hearing and perceiving a very detrimental attitude from mums and other women to having only boys.

The funny thing is I consider myself a feminist in many ways and will always advocate for gender equality in all its forms, but since having boys I'm perceiving a nasty attitude towards having boys only and I find it so demoralising and annoying, to say the least.

I also have to say that the malicious comments come mainly from women, not men, which I find even more disturbing.

I have heard people saying "poor you" when I said that I was expecting another boy. Or women commening on other women having "four boys" with pity in their eyes.

I also saw documentaries of women so desperate to have "the girl" that they went into IVF to be able to choose the gender of their child. The message of the documentary was horrible, basically that these women were so miserable because they had only boys. Imagine what these poor boys are going to think when they understand that message. That they were not good enough because of their gender? We, as women, have been fighting for centuries to avoid that kind of attitude, and now we seem to be promoting it, but the other way round.

Having children is a beautiful experience, no matter what sex they are. Why are some women out there making it all about a competition about having the "girly girl", and making it sound as if having boys only in something to be avoided?

I have two children and I don't want to have more. I would never try for another baby for the sake of expecting to have a girl.

The irony of this little annecdote is that the more I immerse myself in the so called "woman's world", in terms of gender roles as wife, mother, co worker, and even friendship etc, the more I start to think it's quite awful. It's a world full of petty jealousies, judgements and competitiveness and it seems so hard to run away from it, unless you're prepared to be on your own.

If I had a daughter, I would be sick worried of what lies ahead for her.

and do you feel sorry for men with no sons?

Cakepops - are you on a mission to post as many sexist offensive stereotypes in one post? I am seriously sat here with a dropped jaw.

You haven't got a clue.

When we lived in France, we were told that having a boy first, then a girl, is the 'dream of kings'. We did indeed have DS first, then DD, and could feel the approval everywhere we went. I was just happy to have two healthy kids tbh.

My cousin had a baby recently and she didn't know what she was having and said she didn't mind as long as it was healthy.

She had a girl then said she was glad, as her nephew had been over and was so loud and noisy so she was relieved she had had a girl.

I did tell her that is was because he is a child and not a boy and that his dad lets him do whatever he likes as well so there is no discipline either.

I have one of each. My DS came first and whilst I had always wanted a girl, DS had been such a joy as a baby that, whilst I was pleased to find I was having a girl, there was a small part of me that would have loved another boy too.

Why can't people just be happy to have children and not bloody genders!