is DH being controlling? he doesn't want me to wear fancy dress on a mates birthday night out

[WoodlandHills]

He doesn't much like my friend anyway, as he deems her to be "chavvy" and "tarty"
He also implies she is a bad influence on me (again, ffs, I'm a grown woman) as she is in quite a bad relationship (in fact she is one of the friends I was talking about in my last thread re men who don't do childcare, if anyone read it) so she is flirty when she is out and likes to get mens attention. Which, while that is not my thing, I think is totally up to her, its not my place to judge. Although fwiw I have said to her if she wants flirt with other men she would be better off ending her present relationship. I wish I hadn't told DH stuff about her as this just gives him more ammo to dislike her :(

Anyway she turns 30 soon and is organising a night out just her female mates. She wants us all to wear fancy dress and go clubbing. Which tbh I thought will be good, cheesy fun. Me and her are going as sexy policewomen (sorry sorry ) and we both bought our outfits at the weekend online.

I mentioned this to DH today and he really got the MASSIVE arse, saying it was "disrespectful" to our OHs to go out "dressed like slappers" and saying men will be perving over us, etc, etc, anyway the upshot is he REALLY doesn't want me to wear the outfit.

This is being controlling, right? Or not? What would other peoples OHs think if they were in that situation? What should I do? She is quite a new-ish friend and I really like her and I really want to go on this night out :(

Oh god - bored now.

I didn't say I went out in my Anne summers outfits, quit frankly I don't have the balls - plus the outfits I have aren't suitable to be seen anywhere but the bedroom.

So, why do you bring up (and brag about) your Ann Summers outfits on a thread about dressing for going out?

Just because I would not disrespect policewomen by dressing up in a sexy cliche of their uniforms, does not mean I am stuck up an snobbish and with no lingerie for going to bed in!

Whats weird about wearing ann summers dress up out? Its a regular occurence here but we are a party type town.

I guess wearing Ann Summers out for the evening, is the equivalent of wearing your PJ for the school run. Some people live in their bed wear, but I guess they "live a little" and I dont!

The ann summers ones are often meant for out.Its really commonplace and think its weird not to know about this.

Was bragging because I am confident enough in myself to wear a ann summers costume-maybe it was-so what?

I wear what I like and I dont let other womens insecurities effect me....

I have worn dress up to go to various nights out-maid to the rocky horror show,pink lady,saloon girl-on none of these occasions would I have described myself as a "slapper" but then I dont tend to use terms such as those to belittle fellow women....

Quint there is really no need to litter your posts with passive aggressive smilies either....

Pink and Bub - can you respond to my points that I have made, as a professional who has to wear the outfit you chose to sexualise please...

I love the suggestion that people who can't comprehend wanting to go out wearing an Ann Summers sexy policewoman outfit are jealous!
Jealous of what exactly?

midnight - loads of mens professions are sexualised eg forces, firemen,policemen etc.

I agree Bee.

But that isan't what I am talking about.

I am talking about the lack of respect it shows me.

Most police officers in our town pose for photos with girls dressed in similar outfits here.

Also what about gay men that dress as policemen I have seen ones with trousers with the ass cheeks cut out.Its not meant to be serious.

Would those officers be male?

The jealous card That old chestnut. Jealous of what?

Just think about it for a moment.

Say you had to wear a certain outfit 5 days of the week for work.

That outfit meant that people trusted you, allowed you to undertake personal tasks with them, have conversations with people that you wouldn't dream you'd ever have to have.

And then someone decides to wear a 'kinky' version for a laugh. How would you feel?

Almost 20 years of nursing, a post reg degree it has taken me to wear a senior nurses uniform, and I wear it with pride as it represents not only me, but what I stand for as a professional.

Yeah male officers and I have seen male and female officers pose for pics with men dressed with their asses cut out in skintight trousers.

No one here would think anything was weird about men or women going out in not many clothes/revealing fancy dress. I have never thought anything of it until this thread.

Midnight - wouldnt bother me I used to be in military and went out in a version of it with teeny mini skirt and boots etc.I used to do it on camp as well as in town.I know military police who have gone out in these types of outfits to.

Just don't stand near any naked flames in those outfits - lordy!

Oh the old jealous chestnut makes me chuckle. I'd be anything but jealous of the sort of hags that go out in Ann summers costumes round here!!! Haaa!!!

i personally wouldnt wear it for no reason other than i disslike the smell of the fabric most shop brought fancy dress outfits are made of.

i do hold the view that how you dress is a reflection of you personally not anybody else and as such your choice not anybody elses,and i would defend your right to choose how you dress to the death.

My mums is a nurse - she is also a senior nurse in a respected position within a local hospital.

She does not care if I go out in a nurses outfit. Not unless I'm claiming to be able to give 1st aid

My mums been a nurse for 44 years and knows I was a nurse for my hen do, and never said anything about nurses caring about it

You can wear what you like . End of. You should start dressing like a nun when you go out without your dp. He should trust you implicitly. Controlling definately.

Yes you might attract attention but you don't have to act on it.