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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed by these parents at dd's school

298 replies

EnterWittyNicknameHere · 21/08/2012 08:29

Setting myself up for another school run here. DD started primary school five days ago, and since then i've witnessed the following:

One mum has been late every day with her primary one child. She gets into the yard just as the last child in the line is going through the door. Her excuse? She was busy doing her makeup and tan, but LO's been ready since 8.00am.

Another mum works at a shop literally a one minute walk from the school. Her child is also in dd's class. She gets to the yard at approx 8.50am, deposits her child there and leaves him standing there hysterical, calling over at him, "I'm sorry X, but mummy has to go to work!"
Twice, i've seen her approach random mums in the yard saying, "Excuse me. Do you mind watching him for a few minutes 'til the bell goes? I can't be late for work."
One of the mums recommended a breakfast club her own child used to attend, but the mum laughed and said she's not paying for 2 hours care when she only needs someone to mind him for a few minutes.

And finally, another mum told me she uses the breakfast club twice a week to give her a 'break.' She is a SAHM, has no other children, but early mornings don't agree with her apparantly. So she gets her husband to drop LO off at breakfast club (also a newstart primary one) on a Thursday and Friday at 7am so she can stay in bed. She's thinking of putting him in after school club too because she lives a twenty minute walk away and can't be arsed traipsing out in the rain to get him. so then her husband can just pick him up after work instead (her words).

I'm shocked! Really shocked. I'm new to the playground stuff, but is this normal?

I feel like the abnormal one by turning up with dd on time each morning.

OP posts:
rainbowinthesky · 21/08/2012 08:32

You are going to struggle for the next 14 years if you continue in this vein to judge other parents whom you disapprove of.

AGilchrist · 21/08/2012 08:32

Here have a Biscuit you are lucky. Its my very first.

MammaTJisanOlympicSumoWrestler · 21/08/2012 08:34

I am usually first in the playground, as I work nights and don't see the point in going home then back down to school 5 minutes later.

I see children wandering in on their own, way before the bell goes and no parent appears, let alone asks if someone can watch the child.

I send my DC to a before school PE class, just so I can go home and go to bed. My DP takes them and I don't see them from 7pm whe I leave for work, till the next afternoon when I collect them.

I am willing to be you drive to school though and are warm and dry while these mums 'trapse in the rain'.

You will see loads of worse things in your DC school career. Toughen up!!

hokeycakey · 21/08/2012 08:34

YABU what a bitch!

advisemewisely · 21/08/2012 08:34

are any of those children yours??
no?
then mind your own business.

MammaTJisanOlympicSumoWrestler · 21/08/2012 08:35

bet not be

stargirl1701 · 21/08/2012 08:35

Why do you care about random people's choices?

sugarice · 21/08/2012 08:36

I wouldn't get too uptight about other Parents and how they manage their children, just look after your own.

FallenCaryatid · 21/08/2012 08:36

What a little life you must have!
Yes, all these things are very normal, even in the poshest of schools.
Let's hope all your concerns stay as petty for the whole of your child's schooling, it would make my life as a teacher a lot easier if these were the most heinous crimes being committed.

Morloth · 21/08/2012 08:36

LOL, good luck with that.

soverylucky · 21/08/2012 08:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SugarBatty · 21/08/2012 08:37

Isn't it the school holidays? Your talking a load of shite. Well done for getting your kid to school on time though.

DawnOfTheDee · 21/08/2012 08:37

You've found out an awful lot about these people in just 5 days....

GooseyLoosey · 21/08/2012 08:37

I think you are getting a bit of a harsh response here. Most of us would probably judge the scenarios you describe if we were honest. However criticising someone's parenting is highly emotive, so if I were you I would judge quietly, that way life will be much easier.

LookBehindYou · 21/08/2012 08:37

I think you are being unreasonable. And did one of the mums honestly say in your hearing that she was late because she had to do her tan and makeup?

EdithWeston · 21/08/2012 08:38

Yes, you're going to be in for a very tense time.

I suppose you do notice what is happening round you rather more when you yourself are new to any particular circumstances.

Have a Brew - indeed finding a coffee shop near school, or getting one of those insulated cups and taking it with you, makes the school run much more bearable.

ditavonteesed · 21/08/2012 08:38

would you pay for 2 hours childcare for 1 minute, really? you dont know what tired mum does to be so tired, she ,,ay have me, be anemic, be pregnant, care for a relative, be up all night with any number of things. and getting there as the last chhild gois in isnt late.

FallenCaryatid · 21/08/2012 08:39

'And did one of the mums honestly say in your hearing that she was late because she had to do her tan and makeup?

Oh, I have no trouble believing the OP about what she saw and heard.

TroublesomeEx · 21/08/2012 08:39

Wow 5 days at school and the other parents are already pissing you off!

You're going to see a lot more than that over the next 6 years or so that your child is at primary.

More than that, I think you can also be reassured that if you are this quick to judge others, you might find that they are just as quick to judge you.

Of course, you will have good reason for doing the things you will do and making the choices that you will make. But then they probably feel the same.

myBOYSareBONKERS · 21/08/2012 08:39

One mum has been late every day with her primary one child. She gets into the yard just as the last child in the line is going through the door. Her excuse? She was busy doing her makeup and tan, but LO's been ready since 8.00am.

The child is not late then if they are just going through the door - YABU

Another mum works at a shop literally a one minute walk from the school. Her child is also in dd's class. She gets to the yard at approx 8.50am, deposits her child there and leaves him standing there hysterical, calling over at him, "I'm sorry X, but mummy has to go to work!"

Maybe you could be more helpful to those of us that have to work for a living to survive and be-friend her - what "goes around comes around"* - YABU

Shesparkles · 21/08/2012 08:40

Not school holidays in Scotland sugar
To the OP it's mums like you who make the school gates the nightmare they can be. As others have said, stop judging and offer to help a fellow mum

AGilchrist · 21/08/2012 08:41

OP are you a sahm?

FallenCaryatid · 21/08/2012 08:42

I was that judgey when I began teaching as a childless 23 year old with very clear opinions on most things. Couldn't understand why parents were late, shouty, didn't hear their child read or do extension work with them nightly, why clothes weren't spotless and ironed...Grin
I learned fast. Hopefully so will OP.

atacareercrossroads · 21/08/2012 08:42

What do you want? A blue peter badge?

None of the mums in your story warrant your reaction, especially the second one, what's the problem asking another parent to look out for her kid for a few mins? Id have no problem helping another working mum out like that.

SugarBatty · 21/08/2012 08:42

Oh ok thanks sparkles! Blush

Op I still think yabu, ever heard the saying. 'If your going to point your fingers make sure your hands are clean'