to want to stop breastfeeding just because...

[takingiteasy]

I do? Oh I dunno if I'm making much sense but here goes. Ds2 is almost 5 weeks old. Both he and I took to feeding really well and have had no real problems. He's gained a pound since birth, sleeps well, only gets up once in the night and is very content. I took a bout of mastitis a couple of weeks back but we fed through it and coped.

So in spite of all this I am thinking about stopping. My reasons are so selfish. I feel like I do nothing but feed I swear I'm going to get pressure sores from sitting on the sofa. I haven't spent any decent time with ds1 and miss that. Thinkin forward I would quite like a night off sometime in the next wee while and a gin

In all honesty I wasn't expecting to get this far. I only made it ti day 5 with ds1 and have no guilt. I sais I'd give it another go this time round but really didn't think it would work and here I am looking for an excuse to stop. All the while there are women putting themselves through hell to do it.

I also have zero.sex.drive which is no fun.

My DS had "the 6 week growth spurt" at 5 weeks. I spent one night entirely feeding (swapping from one boob to the other every 30 mins) from 7pm until 4am.
My boobs were like spaniel's ears
I kept trying to settle him but he was having none of it
I even said thought, "you're taking the piss sunshine" at about 1am.

I only planned to bf for 6 weeks... DS self weaned at 18months I loved it for the most part and was very smug proud to have done it for so long.

It does get better with less feeds. But my DS never got quicker: each feed was 45-60 mins, even when it was once a day!

you could read to him while feeding ds2 - ds1 cuddled in on one side holding the book and ds2 feeding the other side. He would be cool to run around the park at that age while you feed ds2 and watch from under a tree - you could have a picnic too.
do you think you might have some (unnecessary) guilt that you didn't get to feed ds1 for long but are feeding ds2?

It might take just as long to bottle feed and, whilst someone else could do it, I expect you'll still be doing most of the feeding.
Just a different thought

Maddening that makes me feel like shit too yup.

I would like to encourage you to carry on,not because it is right or wrong, but just because I think it is a nice easy economical way to feed your baby healthily- no bottles to prepare, no formula to buy, you will always be able to feed wherever you are, no worries about contamination etc. As for your older child, they can curl up next to you and read or be read to, or watch TV with you while you feed- I know it is hard to feel that you have to split yourself in two but I do think that they get used to sharing your attention ( and that is no bad thing!) but it does help to include them in the process- talk about what is happening, explain for eg.

It's up to you at the end of the day.

Just to address some of your concerns though...
Feeding will become less frequent and feeds themselves will be quicker.
Drinking is like drink driving, you just have to remember that one unit takes roughly one hour to clear from your breast milk. No need to pump and dump. Your breast milk is constantly refreshed and the amounts that make it in to the milk are minuscule anyway.

I think BF could contribute to a lack of sex drive, I remember BFing DD, middle of a heatwave, I was leaking all the time, wearing those nipple pad things which got all sticky and clammy, I permanently smelled of breast milk and just felt icky and in no way sexy.

Obviously there are ways around that though, if that's the case - shower the second DC is asleep, hop into bed before you're even dry, do it before you start feeling icky again.

I carried on BF for selfish reasons - once we'd got going, if I needed him to go to sleep, 10 seconds on the breast and he'd conk out. Worked like a charm. Just saying!

So stop. What else is there to say? as long as you feed the baby it's nobody's business whether it comes out of your chest or a bottle. People make such a massive deal over breast feeding and it's ridiculous. Just feed the baby however suits you best.

It definitely doesn't take long to bottle feed. Have you ever bottle fed flying?

Ime bottle feeding gets babies into a better routine and feeding takes ten mins compared to an hour!

Anyway yanbu to do whatever you want to in regards to feeding your baby.

I would say keep going if i'm honest. If you feel able to that is, that's physically and mentally. If your reason for stopping is that you feel like you are just feeding all the fucking goddamn time, then definetley just grin and bear it for a few weeks more because a) it will not last and b) the benefits to you and your baby will be mahoosive! Protection for you both, nutritionally better for baby, my favorite: burns 500 calories a day!! bonding time, no faffing about with sterilizers, bottles etc, no extra washing up to do!

however if you feel like mentally you just cannot cope with it, and its making being a mum that much harder for you, and getting you down than you must must stop, breast milk is the best, but formula is in noway bad, its milk. Babies like milk so no problem! There are plenty of people walking around now who were bottle fed and they are living happy normal healthy lives!

For me, im so glad that i pushed through with the breast feeding, it was unbelievably hard at first, and painful and tiring, but once the first 6 or 7 weeks were over it just became one of the loveliest things i do with dd. But that's just my experience. You may have a totally different experience than me. either way like others have said whatever you choose to do, do not feel guilty...its just milk!!

I agree that bottle feeding was easier, technically. But about two months after I stopped BFing, I did suddenly get an overwhelming sadness that I couldn't BF anymore and even researched how to start again despite my milk having "dried up".

If you're sure you won't get that in the future and will really be 100% happy with your decision, then that's your choice :) You need to do what's right for you and your children.

Your baby, your boobs, your decision.
And 5 weeks is much more than many people make it.. Nothing to feel bad about.

But as many posters have said, sitting under a constantly feeding baby at that age is not uncommon - but generally it passes within a few days. I EBF both DDs until 7 months. That happened to me on both girls about that age. And it nearly drove me insane. WTF - NO sleep.??? I cried for me both times. But it passed, and didn't last for long.

So hang on in there, if you can. And if you can't, well you've done well already.

Regarding libido - had the same totally. Sex drive went out the window completely while I BF. And it came back to normal once I stopped BF. We had lots of cuddles but not a lot of sex during that time. But unlike you, I was fine with that...

Congrats on your new baby!

Yanbu, as it is entirely your choice.
Imo (as someone who nky managed 3 weeks with tongue tied baby and ruined nipples) is that if you sre,pain free to try and continue bf even if you express or mix feed

Darnerys yes, bottle fed DS when I was out of the house. I used to express and freeze bf for such occasions because I'm a prude I didn't want to flash my boobs and flabby sides in public.

daenerys sorry - fat fingers

I know that feeling! I bf Dd1for 2.5 months and Dd2 for 3.5 months and the flabby belly was the hardest thing to cover!
I honestly found bottle feeding easier for me although everyone has different expectations and needs.

I didn't even notice!

You are mad, sorry I know we are supposed to respect peoples feeding choices, but....

Swamping BF for sterilising bottles and all the other ridiculous faff every time you leave the house is just mad.

Apart from formula being expensive.

Seriously I've done both and breast is definitely best if your a lazy sod like me.

Express the odd bottle for a rest and an evening out, but don't give up. you've done the hard bit. Not feeding won't stop you being tied to the sofa, babies can take forever to drink bottles or demand endless hugs.

Fortunately DD2 is away or else she would be sending bottles are not for drinking from vibes your DS way.

Selfish reasons to carry on- In another 5 weeks, probably less you will find that breastfeeding will become a lot quicker than bottle when you take into account making up feeds and washing up.

You can usually have one hand free while bf.

You always have an instant clean, pre-warmed supply of milk when you need it.

If you all get stomach bugs he can carry on being bf, which saves a lot of misery all round.

And if you would like one glass of wine, then have one :)

Congratulations on your baby! And congratulations on breastfeeding for 5 weeks, you've done wonders for your baby.

I would second the 'selfish reasons to carry on' above - it will soon be so simple compared to making up a bottle. (I've done both). . . That said, the first .. I think it was 8 but it might have been 10 - weeks were insane. DS just fed and fed and fed. And the sofa does get old. SO I know where you're coming from. I stopped BFing when it did my head in - it was a lot later than you (I am lazy and saw BFing as easier!) but I think 'it's doing my head in!' is a perfectly ok reason to stop. Every breastfeed counts, if you're decided it's time to stop give yourself a hearty pat on the back for what you've done, and move on.

If you decide you wanted to push on through to 12 weeks, to get to the 'easy' part and gain the benefits of all the hard work you've already put in, you might want to go to a sling meet and see if you can find a sling you can BF in. I could BF one-handed in the Maya Wrap, which meant I could be up and about a bit more. I plan to do that all the time with #2, as I'll have a toddler to look after.

Oh! And pour yourself a gin while you're thinking it over. You absolutely CAN have a drink while breastfeeding. You can even have two! (though I just fell asleep after one and a fit of giggling, at first. Pregnancy made me a lightweight! ).

Congrats on your baby!

As lots of posters have said, it really does get better. Apart from one bout of mastitis you've had an easy time, you say?

Well done for getting this far, just 7 more weeks and everything will start to feel like it's flowing better, especially bfing. It would be such a loss to both of you if you gave up now. Believe me, there will be much harder struggles to come in your life as a parent! When your baby gets older bfing becomes so lovely and snuggly and cosy...why miss out?!

Just wanted to point out that bottle-feeding is not the easy option everyone seems to think. Maybe you found it easy with your DS1 but the constant bottle-washing and sterilizing, insane worry about getting feeds ready and wasting feeds that are thrown away and making sure you have enough when you travel etc etc drives me nuts sometimes. I often think bf would have been easier if breastfeeding had worked for us.

The grass is always greener I suppose...!!

Why not try mixed feeding for a while just to get a break? You've established bf now so it shouldn't affect your supply too much to give the occasional bottle.

I only lasted 3 days op

Yanbu but bloody well done whatever you decide.

Lazy, fat, disorganised and cheap. That is why I BF for a year. Lazy; don't get up, just stick a boob into DD. Fat; lost loads of weight. Disorganised; where are the bottles, how long do I sterilise for, aarrgh, how hot does the water have to be? Nope, just stick a boob in DD. Cheap; it's free.