to be all of a caffuffle about the toddler / road incident

[gnomeland]

DS 1(6) and DS2(3) go to school by scooter. They both can get up some speed but on the whole are safe.

There's one particularly nasty road crossing which is on a corner, but with another v quiet dead end road coming off with no pavement (which we have to walk down). Essentially at the end, you have to look 4 ways at funny angles. (realise this isn't very clear.) I hate it as it is an awkward junction.

I have told DSs that they have to stop way before the end and get onto the pavement as soon as they can (but in doing this they are out of my sight - alternative is that they stay in the middle of the road).

Today, DS1 hurt himself so was being quite slow and DS2 went up ahead. As I came round the corner I saw him stepping from the pavement onto the main road. A car came round the corner and stopped (not emergency stop).

I was very shaken because cars can come round very fast and it could have been a lot worse.

Anyway, the driver of the car gave me a real mouthful that I shouldn't allow him on his scooter and I should be holding his hand at all times on the road.

So, what do you do. Am I wrong to allow a 3 year old to nursery on this scooter. I know it was a really dangerous situation but I have tried very hard to teach them road safety. I know if only takes once etc etc but I can't help feeling that it is unreasonable to expect him to walk along permanently holding my hand.

I'm all in a turmoil about it.

Personally yes I agree with the driver, especially at the age of 3.

I also agree with the driver. I have a 3 year old and as much as I teach him road safety I still have to hold on to him when crossing over.

3 year old kids do stupid things. You can not expect them to understand road safety to a sufficient level.

agree, sorry

The driver was quite right to be angry and possibly very upset at what could have happened.
You were in the wrong.

I do hold onto him when we cross. It was the fact that DS1 was unusually slow and DS2 raced off ahead.

So essentially I would have to hang onto him at all times just in case something happened to cause DS1 to stop

Sorry yes you're wrong imo.

This is a personal bugbear of mine...every day on the school run there are kids tearing along on scooters way ahead of their parents/carers.

Can you imagine trying to reverse out of your drive with tiny kids haring along?

It's madness. I don't know why kids just can't walk along holding their parent's hand any more or holding on to the buggy.

I wouldn't let ds on the road, even a quiet road, on his scooter without me being right beside him.

I think ds is too little to go ahead on his own and they need to be on the pavement in your sight at all times for their safety.

It's fine for them to scoot on the pavement, as long as they don't go too far ahead, but I think a 3 year old should be within grabbing distance near a road because they just don't have reliable impulse control at this age.

At 3 yes YABU, and I dont blame the poor driver either, it must have been very very scary for them too.

Essentially both your kids should use their scooters in the park.

An old friend knocked down and killed a child many years ago.
It was not his fault.
A small child ran out between cars.

It's upsets him immensely to this day.

You don't need to hang on to him at all times, but you do need to give him rules about not racing ahead, and consequences if he doesn't (eg having to hold your hand until he does what he's told).

YANBU to let his scooter buy YABU in letting him out of sight.

I let my then 3yo DS scooter to pre-school BUT he was only allowed so far in front and never round corners out of my sight. I quite often had to yell "STOP". If he didn't stop then scooter was taken away or he had to scoot be side me. He soon learnt,

He is now 4.6 and absolutely brilliant at stopping at roads.

Really!!
I'll try again

YANBU to let him scooter but YABU in letting him out of sight

But what if you yelled "STOP" at your 3yr old because a care was reversing and he didn't stop Cadle?

Yabu.

And I think its kerfuffle (not that it matters, just fyi).

'Car' not 'care'

He normally is though, that's the thing. We have rules at the landmarks he has to stop at (entrance to park, fence at the end of the park, corner before school etc).

He always stops - except today

I stand corrected Callmeal

the advice sent out from the road safety bods at the local authoity is to hold the hand of children under 6ish

but he is only 3.. at an age when rules easily get forgotten... you have to make sure they are by your side at that age near roads and driveways

YABU

If you can't keep your child under control, then he should not be riding his scooter along a road. He may not like it, but then I'm sure you wouldn't like him to be hurt. Simple really, no?

I pity that poor driver, you deserved a mouthful imo.

MN is a bit of a mystery at times

Many people think it's perfectly acceptable for small kids to tear ahead on scooters during a busy school run.

Yet they won't let them walk to the local shops until they're in Senior school?!

So he doesn't always stop then does he if he didn't today? You've just been very lucky so far. 3 year olds are unpredictable. YANBU to let him scoot but he needs to scoot alongside you so that you can grab him if necessary.