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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that I should complain about a teacher when DD (15) says no

222 replies

Menashaday · 12/05/2012 15:35

yesterday DD (15) reported that a teacher at school has stuck a plaster over her mouth because she was talking too much. There is a bit of history about being chatty in class and this seems to be have been jovial and light hearted. DD isn't upset or complaining and she says I shouldn't complain because things would be worse. The teacher also did it to a boy in the class and shouted at him when he took it off. Hence DD keeping hers on!

This feels wrong and actually that this teacher should not be teaching - she retires this year in any case.

Advice pleaseConfused

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 12/05/2012 15:41

I wouldn't like to believe teachers could do something like this, but after one of the women in DD1s school office admitted to sticking her hair back for PE with fucking masking tape Hmm I can imagine the plaster thing happening (not that you're insinuating you don't believe her).

But I would say at 15 that your DD is old enough to make the choice for herself.

I totally understand why you might consider going over her head because it seems such a bizarre thing for someone in authority over her to do. It smacks of humiliation and I hate that, but you have to listen to her.

The teacher was in the wrong and retirement is no reason to ignore it if your DD changes her mind though.

Tangointhenight · 12/05/2012 15:41

Why should she not be teaching exactly??? Because she added a bit of fun to the class? Was your daughter hurt, upset or scarred by this? Does she not teach them anything in the class, are grades suffering?Sorry but IMO you are BU and very precious! When I think of the things my teachers did to me in school this is a very silly thing to be getting in a twist about!

Doha · 12/05/2012 15:41

That is abusive behaviour.
She should not be teaching as she obviously cannot control the pupils if shr is resorting to that behaviour.
I would complain to school.

Kayano · 12/05/2012 15:42

I think you should tell your daughter to not talk and disrupt others

I doubt the teacher just did it for no reason.

You said it was lighthearted and dd wasn't upset? Just leave it!

Kayano · 12/05/2012 15:43

Abusive?

WTAF?!?! All you are soon there is detracting fronREAL abuse!

I actually laughed out loud at that

catgirl1976 · 12/05/2012 15:43

Your DD isn't bothered - given the "light hearted" context I can't see a problem

Why would you complain?

IslaValargeone · 12/05/2012 15:44

If she says it was done in a light hearted manner then I think you should leave it, sometimes these things are done in fun.

AgentZigzag · 12/05/2012 15:46

There's no way I would have allowed a teacher anywhere near me if they thought they could stick a fucking plaster over my mouth at 15.

No way.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 12/05/2012 15:46

There was a case a few years back, where a teacher threatened her class that if they didn't stop talking, she would gag them with parcel tape. They didn't, so she did. Iirc, she was fired.

Tbh, I can understand how hard and frustrating it must be when your class, or some of your class, are talking constantly, and you can't get on with the actual teaching, and I suspect that this teacher had tried everything else, and said what she did, because she genuinely believed it would work - and then felt she had to carry it through, when they didn't quieten down. As such, I do have a bit of sympathy for her, but what she did wasn't good teaching practice, or safe for the children, and she should have known better.

donnie · 12/05/2012 15:47

The teacher should not be putting plasters on kids' mouths.

Your dd should not be talking and disrupting the class - esp in GCSE years. If she's in Yr 11 then exams start next week FGS.

WorraLiberty · 12/05/2012 15:47

I think it's funny and as your DD isn't bothered, it was probably well deserved.

I can't imagine a situation where the teacher would seriously shout at the boy to keep his on...but if he or his parents are unhappy, they can always complain.

Otherwise, lighten up. Your DD might learn to stop disrupting the class.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 12/05/2012 15:48

Teacher was very foolish to do this. As a teacher, I wouldn't - even in a "lighthearted and jovial" sort of way, because it could easily be misinterpreted.

However at 15 I think your daughter is old enough to decide if she wants to complain, or for you to do so on her behalf. If she had been five, that would be different.

AgentZigzag · 12/05/2012 15:49

If someone was giving a presentation in an office setting and a couple of people said something to each other while the person was talking, would the person be OK to stick a plaster over their mouths in front of everyone else?

Could that ever come across as anything but lighthearted?

Not to me it wouldn't, and not with a 15 YO at school either.

Tangointhenight · 12/05/2012 15:50

I don't think it was overly professional, but I don't think its a sackable offence, especially for someone who probably has a wealth of teaching experience. I remember my primary 4 teacher pinning me up against a filing cabinet by the scruff, now that should have been a sackable offence even 20 years ago!! Putting a plaster on someone's mouth as a joke =abuse??? Wise up!!

Coconutty · 12/05/2012 15:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LynetteScavo · 12/05/2012 15:52

i agree with EndoplasmicReticulum.

The teacher was foolish.

I'm not sure schools are allowed to stick plasters on cuts without consent these days. Hmm

I wouldn't make a formal complaint, especially as the teacher will retire very soon.

A NQT would need to be told to be more careful in future, however.

Today a plaster, tomorrow duct tape. I can see how a teacher could be tempted.....Grin

IAmSherlocked · 12/05/2012 15:54

The teacher was foolish to do that, particularly in today's climate where the culture is becoming increasingly litigious. Fortunately, as your DD says, the atmosphere was jovial and light-hearted, so the teacher obviously felt she was with a class which could see the funny side.

I am not sure why you want to complain if your DD isn't upset? Confused

AgentZigzag · 12/05/2012 15:54

'I'm not sure schools are allowed to stick plasters on cuts without consent these days'

You've got a point there, in triplicate with a copy sent to the LEA? Grin

IAmSherlocked · 12/05/2012 15:55

AgentZigzag - you seem to be arguing with yourself! I thought you were disapproving of what the teacher did, but you then said that it couldn't come across as anything but light-hearted so Confused

AgentZigzag · 12/05/2012 15:58

Hehe, I knew that didn't read right you passed the test Sherlocked Grin

I meant it wasn't lighthearted.

Marymaryalittlecontrary · 12/05/2012 16:23

When I was 5 my teacher made a girl in the class wear mittens (not sure how long for, I seem to remember it as weeks but was probably only the 1 day!) because there'd been a few incidents of her pinching/nipping other children.

When I was 7 the teacher made a child in the class stand facing the wall holding a yoghurt pot to spit in because he'd spat at someone. The parents didn't complain. I think they told the children off for being naughty at school.

If a teacher had firmly stuck a plaster over my child's mouth and ripped it off in a fury I might complain, but if my child had said it was lighthearted I would probably laugh and tell them 'well that'll teach you, won't it?!' And then talk to them about the importance of listening in class.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 12/05/2012 16:26

I don't stick plasters on cuts, no - I think there is a worry about possible allergic reactions.

I remember when I was at primary school there was a teacher who would really "wash your mouth out with soap" for swearing.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 12/05/2012 16:27

I know a teacher who has a notice on her office wall that says, "Please let me kill one per term - as a warning to the others!"

usualsuspect · 12/05/2012 16:29

I think she's a crap teacher and it's a good job shes retiring soon.

My DS wouldn't have let her do it in the first place.

usualsuspect · 12/05/2012 16:30

Oh and I would complain.

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