to give our nanny fish fingers whilst DH and I eat Waitrose Organic Salmon?

[MarieFromStMoritz]

I am laughing at myself posting this, not sure why...

Anyway, I recently decided that we were going to get healthy. DH is overweight and has high blood pressure and I am overweight, pregnant and at risk of pre-eclampsia. So I have been trying to stick with protein and a salad for dinner and healthy food throughout the day.

I was at Waitrose this morning, and I saw these salmon fillets. I thought they would go well with a nice salad and some boiled potatoes. However, they were really, really expensive. We live overseas and Waitrose is even more expensive than it is in the UK. So I bought fish fingers for DS and just could not bring myself to buy another salmon fillet for my nanny, so thought she could have fish fingers like DS (she has no health issues and is young and slim).

The thing is, by the time I got home, I felt very guilty. She is an adult after all, and I felt that we were treating her like a child giving her fish fingers. Also it suggests that she is not really good enough for the salmon fillet.

I am aware that I am probably overthinking this, but I am just wondering what everyone else would do. Money is tight. Right now, I am probably going to give her the salmon fillet and I'll have the fingers, but I don't know. Would it BU to give her the fish fingers?

Marie, this is from a nutritionist who posted a reply to someone on a different forum:

No one really knows the cause of pre-eclampsia (a blood pressure related disease associated with pregnancy). Many theories have been offered, some without sufficient scientific evidence. This makes prevention somewhat difficult. However, the current belief is that it can be prevented, or at least the symptoms reduced, through changes in diet -- although not necessarily through salt restriction.

You should chose nutrient-rich foods including the following:
-- extra-lean meats, poultry and fish
-- legumes
-- whole-grain breads, cereals and pasta
-- lots of lowfat dairy products, especially yogurt
-- plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables, especially dark green leafy vegetables and deep orange ones, which are a good source of vitamin C

Fluids are also very important -- not sodas or empty-calorie juices, but choices like apricot nectar, carrot and tomato juice, orange juice and grapefruit juice. The very best choice is water! Stay away from highly refined or processed foods since they tend to contain extra, unnecessary salt and fat, not to mention additives. Try to minimize simple sugars; instead choose complex carbohydrates. This will keep your blood sugar at a steadier level.

Another dietary intervention that shows promise for pre-eclampsia is calcium supplementation. which lowers the blood pressure in pregnant and nonpregnant women. It therefore makes sense to optimize your calcium intake before you become pregnant with your second child, and to continue with a calcium-rich diet while you are pregnant.

Studies also show that the increase in calcium should be accompanied by an increase in magnesium-rich foods such as legumes, wheat germ, green leafy vegetables, and whole grains. If you chose to supplement (vs. getting the magnesium through food), the appropriate ratio of calcium to magnesium is 2 to 1.

Lastly, while not a cure for pre-eclampsia, limiting salt intake is a good idea for anyone.

Birds Eye fishfingers are shit
The waitrose ones these puppies are the nicest fish fingers ever.

I would agree though if you are getting waitrose essential fishfingers then they are shit

It all really depends on when your nanny eats, if she eats with you then you need to find a compromise, if she eats with your ds then what is wrong with her having the same as him? If she was making pasta for him then could she not have that? Same with fishfingers?

If you are cooking for her and him though and you and dh at the same time then you need to find a compromise of similar food, just for your own sanity ffs - you don't need to be making 2 lots of food for everyone.

I obviously am seeing it from my mind which is that your nanny would be cooking for your ds and eating at the same time, you and dh later. If you were all sitting down to a meal at the same time then you need to go with making fishcakes or something similar. Perhaps find out what she likes and then give something similar to your ds?

Marie, if you had asked is it ok for me & my DH to have gruel, whilst the nanny eats fillets of salmon - we would have all thought you were slightly barking, but probably no one would have had an issue.
I think what is difficult to swallow (pun intended) is the thought of you & your DH snarfing down what to some people appears to be luxury food, while you give your son & your nanny the cheap stuff.
There are a million & one ways to execute a healthy eating plan in an inclusive way for all the family (and staff).
Still want to know where you are that there is Waitrose & hot weather so I can move there.

"I can't afford fresh fish and meat for everyone" so what do you eat usually the OP, if fish fingers are the norm then I guess OK.

It's discriminatory.
How about evertyone eats salon?
And next time, evertyone eats fish fingers?

salmon not salon!

Cut back on red meat for your dh, so no steak.

Fish doesn't have to be expensive and salmon is not necessarily any more nutricious than other, cheaper forms.
Chicken and turkey are fine.
You could also try Quorn as a mince alternative.

Have you got the nanny an alternative yet?

Thanks TheRhubarb, that is really helpful and quite similar advice to what the doctor told us. Meat and fish is very expensive. I have ditched the carbs (on doctors' orders) due to this stomach problem after eating rice, etc. so that doesn't leave us with an awful lot. Especially if we are all eating the same thing.

Get asked to do something by the boss and thread moves sodding on from fishfingers

Doesn't she eat her gruel in the coalhouse any more?

That's a good point. I'd forgotten the OP was pregnant.

Marie, you need carbs. Just keep what you can low fat.

Maybe you could post on the food board and ask for some ideas. Put your family's likes and dislikes, what's cheap, what's expensive where you live etc.

imnotmymum, we only started the healthy eating plan today. We have always all eaten the same thing.

Also, fish fingers are usually low fat anyway - if that is what is concerning you.

Diet and Hypertension

'A landmark study called DASH (Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension) looked at the effects of an overall eating plan in adults with normal to high blood pressure. Researchers found that in just eight weeks, people following the DASH diet saw their blood pressure decrease.

Recommended by the American Heart Association and the National Cancer Institute, the DASH diet is an overall eating plan that focuses on what people should eat, rather than what not to eat. Rich in fruits, vegetables, complex carbohydrates and low-fat dairy products, the DASH diet is lower in fat, saturated fat, cholesterol, and sodium, and higher in potassium, magnesium, and calcium'

It actually recommends lots of carbs, fruit and veg, and not a lot of meat. The link has a chart with lots of food values.

No PostBellumBugsy, I am not really worried about the fat. It's the coating.

so your usual diet is not meat and fish ? Just imagining how you could have a weekly menu that does not involve meat or fish buying

Not cuts of meat and fish. I can't remember the last time I bought salmon or a piece of steak.

I think the big issue from reading throughout is your DH. He needs to step up and compromise on his food.

If you are cooking, you choose, if you are pregnant, you cook food good for you, everyone else can just fit in.

If the nanny lived off rice for 4 days when left to her own devices, fish fingers will seem like a feast.

You can do lots of different things with potatoes. Wedges, mash, steamed new potatoes, roast.

What about noodles?

What do you all normally eat? I'm guessing your DH can't eat sushi because of the rice, so what does he eat when the rest of you are eating sushi?
If you can't afford to eat meat or fish regularly, where are you getting your protein sources from at the moment?

I totally agree Pooh.

OP your food issues and health issues are more important than your husband's food preferences at the moment, cook what's best for you and let him sort out something else if it doesn't work for him.

I think that's why I've got so ill. We used to eat the following on rotation: Lentil Gratin, Tuna Fishcakes, Tagine & CousCous, Chilli & Rice, etc. But I have been really reacting to any kind of fibre, so stopped eating it. Then we saw the doctor and she suggested just protein and salad for dinner, for both of us.

Alas, it just does not seem feasible.

OP, I think you know your nanny better than anyone on MN. Is she likely to care/notice/be mortally wounded by being cooked something different to you?

That is what is important, not to offend your nanny. If she prefers rice to just about everything, as you described upthread, then she may not care.

Anyway, can I be the first to say This Is A First World Problem [grins].

or even