To be unsurprised that so many women get post natal depression?

[toptramp]

My late mum had post natal depression after a horrendous birth during which she almost died. Couple that with the shock of becoming a new mum and the general lack of staus that society offers mums (especially single mums like me) and I am not surprised that so many of us get so down. It is a wonderful time but it also so tough. What can be done about it?
My birth wasn't great (I had a c-section)and I did it without a dp yet I didn't get pnd like my mum did. I did get the shock of my life mixed with a lot of love!

I developed PND after DD1. I dealt with it. I didn't develop bitterness. How's that working for you trois?

I think the sleep deprivation is the real killer that can tip people over the edge. Add that into a host of other factors, and isolation and/or relationship strain, and frankly, I'm surprised it isn't almost universal.

Perhaps looking at the factors which unite people who don't get it would help researchers?

Heavensmells that is an interesting insight about strong/ control freak people and something I believe myself.

Betterwhen I agree, a support network early on is absolutely vital. If you can express your feelings of inadequacy or whatever, learn you are not alone, and really try to believe that you are a "good enough" mother then perhaps you will not spiral the way I did! With DD2 it was much better - still crap, obviously, but not quite so suicidal

ineedabetternickname glad to hear it! I came off them when DD2 was about 2 and a half if I remember correctly. Now on a host of other tablets but that is another story!

Trois attitude is similar to those that soldiers who get post traumatic stress disorder are mearly weak, total bollacks.

You have to realise that most women don't get it.

PND is very differennt from suffering the after effects of a traumatic birth or sleep deprivation, both are conditions in their own right.

I think that it is quite incredible that women are expected to function on levels of sleep that we know alters a person's whole state, both physically and mentally, but carry on as usual.

I think that it is probably a combination of factors. What i find interesting is that it can start in pregnancy, so has some hormonal influence.

Hearts I could have written your post including GF, for me it was, traumatic birth, poor support, isolation, loss of earnings (I'd moved with dhs job when 6 months pregnant so no mat pay for me) and the final nail in the coffin was sleep deprivation. I've just had dd2 who is dc3 and have really good support, am very confident, adore baby and already have good routine but some days my hormones get the better of me and I can be very tearful. I have had panic attacksfor the first time since I was a teen. I'm very upbeat about it all and the good days are better than the bad and I wouldn't say I have Pnd but that's because I have all things I didn't have with dd1. I think it's a combination of chemical imbalance and lack of support etc.

Oh yes, weak, that was me . Getting up every day, plastering a smile on my face and carrying on as normal. The only person who had the slightest clue there was something wrong was my husband and he in no-way knew the extent of the internal suffering I was going through.
I did that every day for eighteen months.
Then realised that I needed to get help.
Trois-have a

I've never had PND. My DC were very much planned and wanted. Despite that, I still found it hard - the endless cycle of feeding, winding and sleep deprivation. I am in awe of people who manage to do all that while suffering from PND. Now that is real strength.

*The comments you've made

frida thats what I did too! I hope you, and indeed everyone on here who has suffered is/gets 'better soon!

Well, I was slightly mad anyway but I'm getting there.

Yes Snakes exactly.

So much more research needs to be done in this area and in women's (well and of course men's) mental health. Everyone knows it is caused by some combination of genetics, lack of support, isolation, hormones and control-freakishness (that is obviously the medical term). So environmental and physical factors.

My last and worst major bout of depression coincided with early menopause and I am 100% convinced that they were related.

Oh Joyful so happy for you - full of joy in fact

...who have had pnd, circumstances tend to trigger or exacerbate...

Katie obviously knows a heck of a lot more about it than me!

I do think you somehow have to be "predisposed" to a depressive or anxiety disorder in the first place for you to get PND, which could be triggered by lack of sleep and isolation... Is that what you mean?

thejoyful glad to hear you are well, our babies are the same age and I remember reading a post from you during your pregnancy about everything that was going on. I'm glad it's all worked out .

"I had 2 deaths in pregnancy, and a c-section. Actually I had 2 C sections in a year, held down a full time job in the city; also dealt with my incredibly sick father who was all but permenantly in hospital, redundancy , and a fractious moody MIL. and I had 6 inter-uterine blood transfusions into DS2, and he was 6 weeks early.

I didnt get PND - I got up and got on with life. Some people cope, some don't"

trois - some people "cope" by dissociating in a very unhealthy way and never acknowledge the trauma they have experienced. People who've had lots of traumatic experiences but appear not to be even dented by them might themselves be quite unwell. They might look as if they are real troopers, coping with whatever life throws at them, when in fact they are seriously poorly and storing up deep pain. Mental health problems are never a choice, but it is very brave to acknowledge that you are hurting.

Yes. You have to be predisposed. At least that is why my limited experience and research on the subject suggests.