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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that my Granny should stop signing her cards this way?

216 replies

ArrAitch · 13/12/2011 12:05

I have always called my Dad's Mum 'Granny' and when my first son was born I just carried on calling her this. He calls her Granny too (he's two and a half), and I expect our second son will do the same (he's four and a half months). My Mum is Grandma, and her Mum is/was Great Grandma (she passed away last year, but obviously we still talk about her). DH's Mum is Nanny/Nan.

However, Granny insists on signing cards as 'Great Grandma' and it's really starting to annoy, and upset, me. I know I'm being a bit sensitive about it but she has been spoken to about it and asked not to do it. My Grandma was the boys' Great Grandma and I'd like her to stay the only one, especially as they won't remember her (DS1 was just short of eleven months old when she passed away and DS2 wasn't born yet!) so I feel it might be confusing if I'm trying to tell them about Great Grandma who is no longer here, when they're getting cards and presents from 'Great Grandma'.

So AIBU to chuck the Christmas card we got from her this morning in the bin and to tell her next time I see her that if she can't remember her own name she should just stop sending cards altogether?

OP posts:
EricNordmanfirandMistletoe · 13/12/2011 14:46

You twit.

TheFestiveKnid · 13/12/2011 14:56

If I were the great grandmother in question and my grand daughter told me how I can / can't sign my Christmas cards, I would from now on come up with increasingly ridiculous names to sign my cards.

Hmm, starting with 'Lady Priscilla Antonia Saggybottom'.

MrsCarriePooter · 13/12/2011 15:16

Can't quite work out whether you are being precious or bonkers. But YA definitely BU. It seems a special kind of U to insist that a great-grandmother cannot call herself great-grandma because one of her great-grandchildren had, briefly (but has no memory of) another one I'm afraid.

4madboys · 13/12/2011 15:16

so this isnt the regular aitch poster then? i was thinking she had lost it then!

yabu, she can choose what she likes, you son cant even read, its a sodding xmas card.

my ds's have two grandmas and one grandad and one great grandma and great grandad, they are all just called grandma or grandad and they say 'the grandma with a grandad' to clarify which one they are talking about.

when i was little i had big gma nad gdad and little gma nad gdad as one set of gparents were taller than the other! my great gma was called 'nana on the train' as we went on the train when we visited Grin

OldeChestnut · 13/12/2011 15:39

gawd, some people must sit there in the morning over their cornflakes and think to themselves, now what can I be annoyed/offended/irritated by today. Damn there isnt anything, I will have to dig deeper!

ThisIsANickname · 13/12/2011 15:41

Surely this is a piss take.

Rhinestone · 13/12/2011 15:46

You sound like a complete bitch to be honest.

WinterWonderlandIsComing · 13/12/2011 15:46

I have only skimmed but have got the sense immediately. YANU.

My DC are lucky enough to have a great-grandmother who worked the lights which helped shoot down enemy planes during the war.

She lost three out of FOUR of her children, two of them when they were grown and then her beloved husband and as far as I am concerned she can do what the fuck she likes.

WinterWonderlandIsComing · 13/12/2011 15:47

YAB U, obviously Grin

lady007pink · 13/12/2011 15:49

YABU, and barmy too!

lady007pink · 13/12/2011 15:51

Now to hide this thread because it's a very annoying OP....

KateMiddlet0n · 13/12/2011 15:54

Aitch: this op is Not Me. just in case anyone was wondering if i'd lost my actual marbles.

Quote of the week?

nevergoogle · 13/12/2011 16:08

What, this isn't even Aitch having a meltdown??

I thought xmas was getting on top of aitch a bit. I had a vision of a kirstie allsop style tantrum while making mince pies, and sticking cloves into oranges and ripping up christmas cards all at the same time.

ToniSoprano · 13/12/2011 16:11

What a selfish old bitch of a woman - how could she be so spiteful as to sign her cards exactly as she wants, and not how you've dictated? If she doesn't respond well to your next telling-off, perhaps you could stuff her wrongly-signed christmas card into her mouth and lock her in a cupboard until she sees sense....that'll teach her. Does she not realise how right you are?

WTF is your problem?

Northernlurker · 13/12/2011 16:15

You're out of your mind OP - get a grip!

My children also have great-grandparents and in common with the rest of the universe I do not care one dot what they call themselves as long as they are hale and well (ish) and able to enjoy their grandchildren. I think you need to grow up a bit to be honest. You have children now. The ship has sailed on the time when you could throw your teddy out of the cot and demand respect from older people for no good reason other than you demand it. It's unbecoming in a teenager. It's absurd behaviour in a woman of 20 odd.

valiumredhead · 13/12/2011 16:39

Bonkers!

My ds has 2 grandads and up until recently 3 nannies.

pranma · 13/12/2011 16:41

I think she is probably proud of being a Great Grandma and I really think yabvvu in this case.Have you suggested Great Granny as an alternative?

bonkersLFDT20 · 13/12/2011 16:46

It's polite to respect what people want to be called.

My DH's parents insist on the children using their first names. I personally am baffled as to why they don't like the hear their grandchildren calling them Grandad and Grandma (or whatever!), but we have to respect their wishes.

This experience has taught me that there is ALOT more to the grandparent/grandchild relationship than a name. They know exactly who their grandparents are.

AnotherMincepie · 13/12/2011 16:50

YABU. Agree with bonkers that you respect what people wish to be called.

TheOriginalFAB · 13/12/2011 17:08

Your latest post forces me to say calm down a bit. She hasn't lied to your face. Maybne she did agree to your face and then just forgot when writing the card.

CurrySpice · 13/12/2011 17:11

I think the last sentence of the OP is perhaps the most spiteful, small-minded, petty thing I have read on here is a long time. And that's saying something!

MrsHankey · 13/12/2011 17:13

Grin at the 'original' Aitch losing your actual marbles.

Esta3GG · 13/12/2011 17:18

So AIBU to chuck the Christmas card we got from her this morning in the bin and to tell her next time I see her that if she can't remember her own name she should just stop sending cards altogether?

You are certifiable. Seriously. Barking.

Pandemoniaa · 13/12/2011 17:27

If this isn't a wind up then you are beyond bonkers.

This poor woman is your son's Great grandmother. Whether or not you like it and she is entitled to be called what she likes. Get a fucking life!

Pandemoniaa · 13/12/2011 17:34

Oh, and can I just say that my dgd would have been adored by the two wonderful women who didn't live quite long enough to see their beautiful great-grandaughter. I'm sure they would both have been called "Great Granny" but who cares? The real shame is that they never had the chance.