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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask... what do SAHMs do all day?

396 replies

PoppyAmex · 11/12/2011 16:39

I'm pregnant with my first child and was recently speaking to a friend about SAHMs and I mentioned I've been reading so many threads here about how some feel their work at home isn't valued by husbands / partners / people in general.

Following up on this conversation, my friend (a mum of 3) sent me the text below and I thought I'd share as I found it amusing. Maybe a good strategy for women complaining about the same problem?

"A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still in their pyjamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog.

Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pyjamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, 'What happened here today?' She again smiled and answered, 'You know how every day when you come home from work you ask me what in the world I do all day?' 'Yes,' was his incredulous reply. She answered, 'Well, today I didn't do it.'"

OP posts:
FabbyChic · 11/12/2011 16:42

I've read that before.

It's no great shakes seriously being at home with one child, I stayed home a year and was bored, takes 30 mins to clean a house if it is always tidy.

Im not a SAHM type. I prefer to work. More rewarding and I need brain food.

SoupDragon · 11/12/2011 16:43

That "I need brain food" bollocks always makes me want to throw up.

thebigkahuna · 11/12/2011 16:45

I've been both.

WOHM's are more despised by society than SAHM's.

Definitely.

ImperialBlether · 11/12/2011 16:46

Did your friend really text all that?

I've read that before, too, several times.

If the children are at home, there's plenty to do. If they're in school, you're laughing.

SanTEEClaus · 11/12/2011 16:46

Me too Soup. What a load of crap. And I work part time, but at home for myself. But the days I have my son home? I get plenty of brain food.

shaketheshame · 11/12/2011 16:46

The do drop off and pick up, they drink coffee at their local starbucks where they discuss the school, they are wondering if they should go to the gym or not, they tidy up a bit, they cook dinner from scratch, they drink a lots of cups of tea...

squeakytoy · 11/12/2011 16:48

Considering the number of them I see in the supermarket, high street, parks, shopping centres, gym... they are certainly not at home ironing, cooking and dusting all day every day! Grin

amerryscot · 11/12/2011 16:48

The correct answer to the OP's question:

Q: What do SAHMs do all day?

A: Whatever they want. :)

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 11/12/2011 16:48

I watch Jeremy Kyle and eat cake, am I doing it wrong? Hmm

HecklerNotKoch · 11/12/2011 16:49

to ask... what do SAHMs do all day?

mainly sit on MN and moan about having no me time

or

complain that their husbands expect them to actually tidy the house/cook the tea a couple of times a week

:)

Memoo · 11/12/2011 16:50

Fabby, if you don't find taking care of your children challenges your brain then you're clearly doing it wrong.

Jux · 11/12/2011 16:50

I sit about elegantly all day eating chocolates and reading gothic novels. Occasionally I polish my jewels. My dh knows better than to criticise or complain, so when he gets back from his little job in the city he scurries around doing housework and then peels the grapes for the next day.

'tis as it should be in any well-regulated household.

Aim for that, and you will cope.

Grin
Ragwort · 11/12/2011 16:51

Can you really only get 'brain food' from being in paid employment? Hmm.

thebigkahuna · 11/12/2011 16:52

Is it me, or have the attacks on SAHM's on here become a bit more frequent since the recession? Wink

TheChristmasCountessOlenska · 11/12/2011 16:52

I don't do that much at home tbh. But then I didn't do much at work when I was full time either Grin

BurntToffee · 11/12/2011 16:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 11/12/2011 16:54
Grin
suntansue · 11/12/2011 16:55

30 mins to do the housework, I spend longer than that on the bathroom alone :/

suburbandream · 11/12/2011 16:56

Yawn. How many times has this been done??

shaketheshame · 11/12/2011 16:56

Oh yeah and I like to hear them saying..oh my god, I'm so busy busy ! I have to take John to his karate lesson and lucinda to her cello lesson but thanks god I have Rosemary (our phillipino lady) looking after Estrella our last born !

troisgarcons · 11/12/2011 16:57

I've been both.

It totally did my head in being at home. I missed normal people and normal conversations!

I think PT is the ideal solution - when I'm Prime Minister I'm going to make it THE LAW that Parents get first dibs on school hour jobs! Further than that, I'm going to make it THE LAW we have 3 day weekends as well!!! Vote for Meeeeeeeee Grin

LotteryWinnersOnAcid · 11/12/2011 16:58

Cleaning, cooking, washing, admin (eg, I am in charge of the finances, paying bills, remembering birthdays, etc), food shopping, walking the dogs, dragging bringing up the baby and PLAYING. Playing is my favourite bit. But I hate washing up - I leave that to DH. Grin

valiumredhead · 11/12/2011 16:59

Only 30 mins fabby? Only you said an hour on the other thread the same as this one. Make your mind up! Grin

sickoftheemails · 11/12/2011 16:59

I also thought fabby was on the sick for number of years

lockets · 11/12/2011 17:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.