To be annoyed with this waitress?

[ImaginaryGiraffeIsMyBestFriend]

Went into a cafe today with my Sister, 1yo niece and 2 friends. We each ordered a drink and one of my friends was deciding what to eat for lunch before work when a waitress came over and told us we had to take my niece out of the high chair we were using and sit her on my knee and feed her there because another child (who was quite a bit older than my niece) needed the use of the high chair. When I refused she then said that because we'd brought our own food in for my niece we were less of a priority for high chair usage than the other child because they were ordering food for her off the kids menu (all of which was processed, salt laden food as opposed to our home made stuff). When I complained I was told that it was 'against their policy' to allow people to eat food brought in from outside, regardless of age, and that they were making an exception for us as it was. We walked out with all of our drinks completely untouched and went to a cafe across the road, where we had no problems feeding her the food we had brought.

AIBU to think this is a ridiculous rule? We've never had any problems feeding her home made food anywhere else and usually do order off a kids menu for her if the food is suitable (DN is extremely picky and won't eat things like fish fingers or chicken nuggets, which is about all thats available on a kids menu in lots of places).

Why did you not order your DN a delicious pancake?

god YABtotallyU. Taking your own food into a cafe for a 1 yo is just scroogeville

Why couldn't you have said "we are feeding her now but she will have eaten before there food is ready so we will pass the seat over then?"

Ordering from the kids menu for a 1 year old is a big waste of money anyway.

Did you not leave a decent tip last time you were there, is that why the waitress wanted to chuck you out asked for the highchair? ;)

Waiting until the baby is finished eating before all the adults even order their food lest she get distracted sounds like a ridiculous and time consuming faff. Like several other posters already said, they probably used the first excuse they could to encourage you off the premises.

Yanbu. We often take something for 16 month old dd (ranging from cheapo diners to a la carte restaurants) and no-one bas ever batted an eye. We will be spending x amount on adult food and drinks, and unless a place provides something suitable for her age group (low salt, low fat etc) then she can't eat there. Only today we had lunch at a lovely gastro pub, costing circa £90 for the three of us and dd picked at bits of it while eating the food we brought her. The staff we lovely, she was their favourite guest. Had they not allowed it, we would have left and they'd have been down £90 plus bar bill, very short sighted.

If she was 5 it would be different, 1 is a baby!

So, from the waitresses point of view you were taking up a table for four whilst just having a drink & waiting for DN to eat her brought in food. At lunchtime. The fact that you were intending to order food after DN had eaten was irrelevant really, you were still using their premises as little more than a handy place to feed DN for maybe 20-30 mins?

The waitress had no guarantees that you would in fact go on to order food and it is fairly odd to not order until the baby has totally finished eating. Presuming that you would have had to allow time for your food to be cooked/prepared, a more normal thing to do would have been order when you ordered your drinks & hope that you didn't have to wait too long after DN finishes eating surely?

I bet that if you had already ordered and paid for 4 adult meals then this would not have happened. It does sound like a way of "getting rid" of cheeky beggars from the cafes point of view.

x-posts with floggingmolly. Great minds think alike .

maybe the baby would be a less fussy eater if you all stopped staring at her and ate alongside her?

I think some of you seem to be missing the point that cafes operate in the hospitality arena. This particular establishment seems to be rather lacking in the hospitality factor.

Cafes, hotels, restaurants and other hospitality-driven businesses rely on repeat business and this is no way to get it.

As I've already said - we were all eating but had asked the waitress not to take our order till after DN had finished eating because she gets distracted by her mums food and then stops eating - the waitress was fine with this and asked us to call her over when we were ready.

We were in a small cafe which does sandwiches, soup and breakfast plus pancakes and chocolate cake as dessert choices, plus the kids menu - none of which my niece would eat. I honestly don't see why a one year old should be expected to eat from a kids menu. Again, as I've already said, we've taken her there before with her own food and had no problems.

This is the first time we've ever had a problem with giving her food we've taken into a cafe or restaurant, which is why I was surprised by it.

I'm quite shocked at the amount of people who thought you were BU for taking your own food for a 1 year old.

The last time we went out for lunch with DD was when she was 14 months and I took my own food for her. I didn't give it a second thought that it would be unreasonable so I have learnt something today!!
We DID order some vegetable batons off the menu for her to nibble on too, but this was more to help keep her occupied than because we felt we should.

I would have been fuming if I was asked to take my DD out of the high chair because somebody else needed it though, regardless of how much money we were/weren't going to spend.

Was the cafe full today? I know you have said it is often not that busy but today, on a busy Christmas shopping day, was it full? If so, I can see why they didn't want people holding a table for 20-30mins just so that a baby can eat home-prepared food. As I said before, I don't think the highchair was so much the issue & if you had all been eating at the same time I doubt this would have happened.

So if a place is full, one customer eating something they have brought with them, another wanting to eat off the menu would they be unreasonable to ask the ones eating there own food to give up the seats?

This is the same principle really!

Yanbu, we at out all the time, always have done since the kids were babies and never experienced this. Much of the kids menu in many ok places is shit. Also cafes are as much for drinks/dairy type stuff as food.

YAB(astonishingly)U. If you don't like the children's menu go somewhere where you do. Very annoying sense of entitlement to your post OP.

Also I don't see why you had to wait to order your food. Most places take 10-15 mins at least to bring the food surely that's plenty of time for her to eat the majority of the meal?

What was your neice going to be doing for the time you were waiting for and eating your food?

and, frankly, weird to all sit there and not eat whilst she eats. No wonder she's fussy.

There was us, a woman and a little boy (in a high chair) a family of 4 plus the family who 'needed' the high hair we were using.

I appreciate that her eating first may seem strange to most of you but DN really is a nightmare to feed. I've never met a child like her - she hardly eats anything at all, them whines because she's hungry, points at food and makes 'num' sounds but when you give her food she then refuses to eat it. It really is very frustrating for my sister which is why she tries her hardest to get as much down DN as she possibly can at every mealtime.

This is a one yr old, taking your one food is fine.

and, frankly, weird for four adults to all sit there and not eat so the baby can eat without distractions. No wonder she's fussy.

oops. but you get my drift

I don't think you're being unreasonable, I think those who think you are BU are utterly bananas!

She's a one year old.

Parents of babies - because that's what she is - usually carry tupperware containers of food or jars. It's completely normal.

It sounds like a crap restaurant anyway. Crap food, rubbish service. Just don't bother going there again.