To actually not be able to stand it when mum and mother in law call my DS their baby?

[Ohnoredundo]

I just need to check that I'm not going insane as this AIBU does seem petty in the extreme. My mum and MIL call my DS their baby. I wouldn't even be as upset if they said 'our' baby. I've just come hom from MIL and she must have said "how's MY gorgeous boy" about five times - and to me it seemed the more I was becoming clearly annoyed the more she was doing it. I realise this all sounds ridiculous - I just wanted to check this wasn't PND and if it would upset other people.

I doubt it's pnd if this is the only manifestation, and you are being a bit U.

He is their grandson, so technically they do have a claim to some 'my'ing. I think you should let it go, it is a tad, er, deranged.

Winds me up too and I know I'm being VU but I don't care - my MIL is a bit mental ends post right here before I get lynched for MIL-bashing

YABU. I think everyone will know your his Mum because you gave birth to him, its a term of affection and a way of talking to babies.

On the plus side Im very happy that you chose to write Mum and MIL as then its not just a typical dig at MIL mumsnet type post.

Put in another way, they are really very fond of their grandchild.

Take it easy, OP.

They love their grandchild. That is all.

No, this has never really bothered me. They just appear to be happy to have a grandson.

I know where you are coming from. My XMIL comes out with phrases like 'she's my girl not yours' Infuriates me.

Used to annoy me, but if I´m lucky enough to ever have a GS, I can imagine myself saying "how´s my best/favourite/lovely/etc/boy" tbh.

They don't actually mean he's theirs.

They just mean he is special to them and they love him and he's their family.

This should please you, shouldn't it?

But, if you wanted to make a point in a non confrontational passive aggressive way because you feel annoyed that they have a way of talking to him that indicates love and affection and closeness, you could always laugh and say "funny. You say he's yours, but I'm the one with the episiotomy scar / c section scar / whatever."

It doesn't bother me either, I am just glad my DS's have family that love them - there are plenty that dont

minus, that's very different! Her girl not yours? That's bang out of order.

I think it's pretty normal for a new mum to get upset by totally harmless utterances from their mil/mum. That doesn't necessarily mean it's reasonable though. I quietly fumed about something similar last week, but, yeah, like others have said, think it just means they love their grandson

I remember my MIL going on & on about the GC having brown eyes "just like Gran".

Apart from the fact that my husband & I, FIL, both my parents & all 4 of my GPs have/had brown eyes!

(And the children´s eyes are a darker brown that hers!)

My mother still insists on addressing everything she posts to my daughter to 'Nanny's Little Sunshine' even though she now 18. It wouldn't be so bad but I have to collect parcels from the post office here and use an official form of ID to do so. Strangely enough, her passport doesn't have her name listed as this.

My grandson = OK

My baby = no

My favourite boy = OK

though minus/hecate, that is exactly what my mil said last week, so maybe i was right to be annoyed after all?!

YABU! Although not sure that you're being serious anyway!

I should make clear it is 'my baby' they say in amongst 'my gorgeous boy' and 'my beautiful boy' etc etc. I find it insensitive. He's not their baby. Yes I'm being possessive and ridiculous. Yes I do have other things to worry about. Just needed a vent. Husband has said feels annoyed when my mum does it. My MIL also refers to mine and my husband's wedding as 'our' wedding which I also find v. annoying. Right - I'm off to pour wine...

My parents and PIL both call DS my gorgeous boy/my little man/Nanny's special boy etc. My 86 year old grandad calls him my boy or just boy, but mainly because he can't remember his name (he calls me Girl too)

Why would you mind this? Unless they're saying my baby not yours. Your DS is a member of a family, he belongs to them as well as you. He's not a possession to own.

YABU and possessiive, sorry!
sounds like a great idea!

'our wedding' is weird!