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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have let DS1, aged 7, to spend his birthday money on a toy pram?

208 replies

IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 18:28

DS1 got some money for his birthday, and as he loves his dolly, and is too tall for his stroller (the £5 type ones aimed at 1 year olds) I let him spend his money on a lovely toy silvercross. His Dad, and all my in-laws, are horrified. DP has even told me its not 'normal' for a 7 year old boy to have a buggy!

OP posts:
ScaredTEECat · 09/10/2011 18:30

How silly. How else will he learn how to be a good daddy if he doesn't practice now?

Some people are just weird. His dad and his family, I mean. Not your son.

troisgarcons · 09/10/2011 18:30

Whatever floats his boat. He like it, he gets pleasure from it. I dont see the problem myself.

EndoplasmicReticulum · 09/10/2011 18:31

YANBU. His birthday money, if he wants to buy a pram I see no problem. As Scared said - men push prams too.

StewieGriffinsMom · 09/10/2011 18:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

foreverondiet · 09/10/2011 18:32

The only reason I am a a tiny bit Hmm is his age.

But if thats what he wanted why not?

MercyDulbottle · 09/10/2011 18:32

I would think it could lead to teasing, if his friends find out.

Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 18:34

I was a bit concerned that he is a bit old for a doll, or that he would get teased, but he often carries the baby around and so far has (or so he says) never been teased. I agree, DPs family are weird!!! lol

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squeakytoy · 09/10/2011 18:35

If you had said he was 3 or 4 I wouldnt have thought anything of it, but it is a bit unusual for a 7 year old boy and as mercy says, it really could lead to teasing from his friends who are out playing football, riding their bikes, and doing the things that boys generally do...

Plonker · 09/10/2011 18:37

I must admit that I'm surprised that a 7yo would want a new toy pram, but then my girls had all grown out of the pram phase by the time they were about 5.

That said, my 10yr old neice still loves her dolly and pram, so I'm sure it's not unusual.

YANBU AT ALL on the grounds of your child's gender - how ridiculous that he shouldn't have one just because has a penis Confused

Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 18:39

lol thanks Plonker. I did ask DP what if we had a DD, and she wanted to spend her money on toy cars? He just replied that its not the same thing Hmm but wouldn't/couldn't explain why!

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mrspear · 09/10/2011 18:42

I think there is your answer ineedabetternickname.

It is HIS money HE should spend it how HE wants.

lljkk · 09/10/2011 18:42

Just make sure that pram's fairly neutral colours (not pink).
I have a 7yo DS who collects Blue Noses, but already can't admit to it in public Angry.

Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 18:44

lljkk it is blue, he refuses point blank to have anything pink! Shame really, as you can get really cheap pink prams!!

mrspear, that was my arguement with DP!

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/10/2011 18:48

I have a lot of sympathy with your DP and family. In an ideal world, no it wouldn't matter. But in the real world children are not tolerant or PC. Kids get bullied for far less than a doll's pram

RosemaryandThyme · 09/10/2011 18:56

Oh honey come on - a seven year old boy - it is surely unusual to be carrying a doll around and buying a pram ?
I'm wondering how he plays with the doll ? like an action-man type idea? is the pram a sort of army-transporter (in his imagination) ?
If its kinda boy-play but just with girl toys as replacement boy toys then I would think that is why his friends are fine with joining in.

LindyHemming · 09/10/2011 19:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

duckdodgers · 09/10/2011 19:03

Since when was a pram only a "girls toy" Rosemary? Hmm

exoticfruits · 09/10/2011 19:04

My rule is -their money-their choice. However, at 7yrs, I would (gently) encourage them to fit in more with their peers.

Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 19:04

he plays with it like a baby, how else would he? ie he changes it, feeds it, takes it for walks, sings to it!

I HATE the idea of toys being girls/boys!! Toys are toys! IMO if they enjoying playing with it, then thats fine!

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Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 19:05

I did try that exotic, but he was adamant he wanted a pram!

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exoticfruits · 09/10/2011 19:07

I would just go with it then-his choice.

ScaredBear · 09/10/2011 19:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Witchofthenorth · 09/10/2011 19:08

How utterly ridiculous, girls toys and boys toys! Rubbish.....it's his money he an buy what he likes with it! Just had the same argument with my in laws last week funnily enough. I was told by nana that if my son asked her for a kitchen for Christmas she would tell him to fuck off! I shit you not that was her words!

When (after much spluttering by me at her swearing at my son) she was pushed on my daughter asking for soldiers or a toy gun, she said that that was different Confused

Obviously you get female soldiers but not male chefs.........

I suspect sometimes it's an older generation type thing. But I am with you OP I don't see what the issue is personally :)

duvetdayplease · 09/10/2011 19:10

exoticfruits - I think that is one of the saddest things I ever read - 'I would gently encourage them to fit in more with their peers' - wtf is wrong with being a tiny bit different from your peers? Especially when some of his peers will undoubtedly grow up to be hideous, dull, misogynistic, uninspiring a-holes? I would want my kids to go their own direction, to be able to work out what they like, even if it doesn't fit in with the rules laid down by the Daily Mail.

I feel a bit depressed now...

Original poster
IneedAbetterNickname · 09/10/2011 19:14

he did push dc in buggies when they were tiny, but fails to see that its the same thing!! My Dad had similar experience when I was a baby, back in 84. He was pushing me to local shops in my pram, and my brother, who was 2ish at the time was pushing his rag doll 'man' in his toy buggy.
Old woman: "awww your daughter's beautiful"
Dad (peering into pram): thanks she is isn't she!
Old woman: Oh, I meant the older one
Dad: Oh! He's a boy!!!
Old woman: Why's he pushing a pram then?
Dad: Well, am I a man or a woman??
Old woman: A man obviously!
Dad: And what am I doing??
Old woman: Ummm,
at that point she rushed off! My Dad laughs everytime he recounts this story!!!

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