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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think school have said no for my child absence for a family holiday

335 replies

HidingInTheBathroom · 06/10/2011 17:05

We are going on holiday next month. My DS (8) school have refused the leave.

I handed the form in yesterday and got a reply today. I wouldn't mind but he never has time off school. He has not had 1 day off this year and last year he had 1 and half days off because he was sick at school and was still poorly the day after.

We have never been on holiday in school time and out of all his school life I think he has had a total of 4-5 days off ill.

They say if I take him I could get find. Going next month so my DS will be off school for a total of 10 days. We have been waiting for this holiday for 4 years.

AIBU to think they should off not refused this absence.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 06/10/2011 17:06

No they are not. However you ARE being U

MrsHuxtable · 06/10/2011 17:07

Yabvu. It's school time, not holidays. !0 days is a lot! It's not like it's a single day for a family wedding or something.

ChitChattingWithKids · 06/10/2011 17:08

If the only reason you are going during term time is because the holiday is cheaper then YABU for requesting time off - 10 days is the maximum allowed per child, after all.

However, if there is a specific reason that you have to go during term time (eg family wedding) then YANBU.

Which is it?

MrsHuxtable · 06/10/2011 17:08

Also, if you've been waiting for this holiday for 4 years, surely you could have planned it to be in the school holidays.

AnyoneButLulu · 06/10/2011 17:08

Sorry, if you go on holiday in termtime you have to factor the fine into the cost.

SkiLift · 06/10/2011 17:08

YANBU - I can't stand it when they do this.

If you can afford the fine, then go on the holiday then pay up. It will be £50.

Whatever you do, don't expect the teacher to spend a moment on playing catch up with any work that has been missed, and don't ask her to set you any holiday work. If you choose to take your child out then it would be up to you to catch up.

If i were you, I would just go on the holiday and pay the fine.

Itsjustafleshwound · 06/10/2011 17:09

You want the school to give you their blessing because you have done what the law requires??

Sorry, YABU

GypsyMoth · 06/10/2011 17:09

I have 5 dc and have to go in school holidays regardless of cost/advance organised etc!

Why should the rules be different for you?

Hulababy · 06/10/2011 17:09

Lots of schools this year are starting to not allow any holidays as authorised. The Government have set really high attendance targets for schools and the only way the HTs have any chnce of reaching them is to not allow any holidays and hope that reduces how many people will take them. However, the fines are often not that hgh compared to the reduced term time holiday prices - so we are finding many prefer to take the risk of a potential fine anyway.

Schools still have the discretionary 10 days thing but many HTs are not allowing even these.

JockTamsonsBairns · 06/10/2011 17:10

Of course YABU. Up to you how you play it from now though. We took Dd out of school for 5 days at a similar age, and just paid the fine when we got back.

Blu · 06/10/2011 17:11

I don't think they are allowed to mark holidays down as authorised absence.
And some local authorities seem to take direct action re fining parents who take unauthorised absence.
But is it very likely you will get a fine? So you know other people from your school who have been fined? Otherwise it will simply be marked as 'unauthorised absence' and nothing will happen.

Is there some special reason why this particular holiday at that time? If you can show that you may not be fined, even if they try. There was another thread about an absence for a holiday which was the first time a parent hav=d been able to go away with the family after having a v serious illness.

squeakytoy · 06/10/2011 17:11

10 days is quite a bit for your child to catch up with everyone else when he goes back... YABU.

BECKS21 · 06/10/2011 17:11

If the teachers at your childs school went on strike and caused your child to miss a days schooling, then I would say the school are now being unreasonable.

Laquitar · 06/10/2011 17:13

Where are you going?

Original poster
HidingInTheBathroom · 06/10/2011 17:13

I am going on holiday. We are going to Florida. Was men't to go last year at Christmas but the flights got cancelled due to snow. so the only time my husband could get off work for 2 weeks is next month.

I don't expect the teacher to give him any extra work. We are a young family and can not afford the extreme cost for school holiday holidays. Also if you go Florida in the summer the weather is far to hot for the younger ones.

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 06/10/2011 17:14

If the teachers are on strike, ALL the children miss a lesson.

If everyone were to just take holidays whenever they felt like it, there would be chaos.

Supposing the teachers decided they were going to have holidays during term time?

aldiwhore · 06/10/2011 17:14

10 days in on hit is a lot. However, our school are so understanding we only go on holiday during term time, and DS is not suffering, we're very on top of his education and he doesn't fall behind (and that's our responsibility to make sure of).

Had you been at our school, you'd have been granted authorised absense, providing that your child is working well (not necessarily the 'best' but trying hard) - I guess I must be lucky.

However, YABU to kick off that its refused, but I would be annoyed that this decision is NOT about what's best for the child and teacher, but to hit a target... grrrr. I'd take the fine OP you've waited a long time, his whole education will not fall apart if you go. SOME things are more important than school, and many things are more important than targets, which seem to becoming more and more unreachable each year.

AgentProvocateur · 06/10/2011 17:15

YABU - the rules apply to everyone, even people who've never had a day off sick. Unfair to the teacher and the rest of the class.

GumballCharm · 06/10/2011 17:15

i agree that 10 days is too long in term time. I also think that holida companies should not be allowed to charge so much in school holiday time.

hayleysd · 06/10/2011 17:16

The fine here is £50 per parent per 10 sessions (mornings and afternoons) so the fine could be £200.

NinkyNonker · 06/10/2011 17:16

I was about to say I bet you would feel differently if strike closed the school and the children stayed home...then it would be all concern for the missed work.

I'm a teacher, I don't have huge issues with kids having hols during term. But 10 days is a lot, and Yadbu to expect them to approve it.

squeakytoy · 06/10/2011 17:18

Will you be expecting the teacher to spend extra time in helping your son to catch up with his work when he gets back too?

PatriciaHolm · 06/10/2011 17:18

"I don't expect the teacher to give him any extra work. We are a young family and can not afford the extreme cost for school holiday holidays. Also if you go Florida in the summer the weather is far to hot for the younger ones."

Well, spend less, going somewhere nearer, that isn't so hot, in the summer holidays! Taking him out of school for 10 days simply because you want to go to Florida is not something the school could possibly authorise, regardless of his attendance record.

exoticfruits · 06/10/2011 17:20

I expect they have no choice-their LEA will have said that term time holidays are unauthorised absences. You can still go, but it will be unauthorised on the register and they can fine you.

CupOfBrownJoy · 06/10/2011 17:20

YABU to expect the school to support you in breaking the law.

10 days off is a lot, especially at this time of year.