To tell ds9 he can't go in neighbour's garden now they have a swimming pool

[Bluesatinsashes]

Been lurking for a while but this is my first thread. I'd like to know what you wise ladies think. Our back gardens are easily accessible, separated by hedges only so kids can run between gardens to play. DS is a good swimmer but we also have a dd3 who can't swim, so I've told them both they can't go next door but one anymore. DS understands my reasons but it's going to be hard for him when he has to say he can't go over, isn't it?

What on Earth do you mean squeaky? Are you saying you would be against legislation that protected lives by ensuring fences were up around private swimming pools? I don't get it?

countries with 'pool culture' legislate - why not here?

I agree with squeaky when is the age then to stop supervising? Your uncle was 17 NotaMopsa not a young child, it was dreadful accident, but you cannot supervise them forever? Its a shame schools don't do swimming anymore, we used to have swimming lessons provided by the school, and used to be bused in from school to the local leisure center. In an ideal world it would be good for children to become used to the water and safety from a very young age.

PMSL at some of the posts

One specific one

even a 14 and 15 year old needs looking after hmm

ha ha ha ha ha

On top of which, a child's ability to swim does not mean they can't drown.

Its makes a world of difference actually.

a child's ability to swim does not mean they can't drown

Oh sorry - have to PMSL at that. An adult's ability to cross the road doesn't mean they won't get mown down ffs. You really are a nervous wreck aren't you?

Yes I do agree with fencing around pools, totally

I am very much in favour of children learning to swim, and have taken mine since they were 8 weeks old.

I was taught to have a healthy respect for the water, and this includes knowing when it is safe to swim alone and when it isn't. I'm not sure it would always be ok for 9 year olds to be swimming alone. 14/15 year olds are very different.

Again as I said I grew up on an Island surrounded by water and where lots of swimming was undertaken at pools - I was brought up to never swim alone. It was pretty common.

Anna, mopsa appeared to be saying that there should be legislation to ban children under 12 from going unaccompanied to a public swimming pool, she did not mention fencing private pools.

But maybe all rivers, canals, deep puddles, should be fenced too, you know, just in case.

The gate to the pool should be padlocked if the pools not supervised.

Annawintour - no, the pool isnt fenced but my DCs are 11, 12 and 15 so their friends are of similar age. The garden is fenced (6 foot fences) and we keep the gate locked.

I am a little shocked that a parent would allow a 3 year old to run between gardens. All the toys we have had in our garden over the years have been age appropriate to my DCs not some other neighbour's child. This means climbing frames, pools, trampolines.

Anna, in case it escaped your notice, the UK is also an Island, surrounded by water...

[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-84339/Girl-drowns-swimming-class-helpers-close-by.html here]

[http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/oxfordshire/3888249.stm here]

[http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/oxfordshire/3888249.stm here]

it happens under the closest supervision

I am not a nervous wreck - you are abusive.

here

here

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does that work

I am really shocked - do people let their children swim alone in the UK? That is a huge risk. For a teenager or an adult also.

This thread blows me away.

No - I suggest you indulge in a little light work around the dictionary until you figure out what abusive is. What I am doing is pointing out that you are hysterical. I am taking issue with your peculiar views. That is not abuse.

I am not hysterical.

You are abusive.

Anna - there's no pool culture here - there's no idea. Literally, no idea, as you can see.

Squeakytoy - you come across as clueless when it comes to swimming and safety.

OP, I think you are possibly inadvertentedly putting your neighbours (the owners of the pool) in a difficult position. I was surprised to read that your DC wander around other people's gardens. The neighbours may have the responsibility to ensure they only invite your DS when they are willing to supervise, but the existence of the pool can be a magnet for children and it's possible that DC could then wander over there when your neighbours are out/on holiday/not supervising and then get into problems. Am not sure of the legal position in the UK, but do know that pool owners in other countries do have to take this into consideration and ensure pools are fenced safely and securely.

I brought my children up in a pool culture. All our friends with pools are well aware of the danger. If I was ever lax about mine, nipping inside to get lemonade, I was never, never never, lax with their friends over. Christ, the risk.

Anna, public swimming pools generally have someone there other than the swimmer.

Beaches and lakes do not, but if a parent has taught their child a healthy respect for water (not sheltered them and put them in a lifejacket and a pair of inflatable arm bands if they so much as go out in the rain), then a child who is old enough to go out without their parent should know better than to swim on their own.

There will always be tragic accidents, but educating our children, rather than keeping them wrapped up and increasing their desire to sneak off behind your back, will have a far greater effect in preventing more deaths.

Alright dear. You keep saying it if it makes you feel better! But you do need to find out what abusive really is. That's all.

I can see there's no getting through to you whilst you are so worked up so I'll toddle off to bed now. Forgive me if I have a few sniggers at you on the way won't you.

annawintour thank goodness for a voice of reason