I would post this in feminism but I've never posted there so .... AIBU to have emailed a company

[changingmynameagain]

Backstory - am looking to get a pop up tent - how boring.

Anyway, stockists locally are a major sports/camping retailer.

I was on the website looking to find out if they had the tent I wanted in stock to go and buy it, but also so that they could demonstrate it to me - how it goes up and down.

Anyway, I'm on the website filling in the "contact us" form and the only options for "Title" are

Mr

Mrs

Miss

Now, call me pedantic but I'm divorced, so I'm not a Mrs. I'm not a never married so I'm not a Miss.

There was NO OPTION for Ms.

For some reason this really got my goat and in the comments box of the page I actually typed

"Oh and for your information there's no option in your title box for Ms. I am divorced, therefore I am not a Mrs. I was married, therefore I am not a Miss. Please could you get some of your IT boffins to insert the option for Ms. In this day and age, I think it is unfair that the only options available on the form for a woman to have as a title refer to her marital status."

And yes, I know it's trivial but it got right up my nose.

I'm a business analyst and have spent ages in meetings discussing how many different titles to hold in the system and the pros and cons of allowing free format entry. Sometimes we just have to make a decision about which ones to include and inevitably will offend someone... although not including Ms seems pretty poor so yanbu to complain.

I am obv the only one who thinks James is rather funny by taking the piss by addressing you as 'Miss' - you do realise that your complaint is doing the 'joke email' rounds now

seriously - there are bigger issues in the world

so frgr if companies follow the advice of the person who said we should do away with the Mrs option and call everyone Ms should I start a AIBU thread to complain?
I was merely pointing out that Mrs isn't short for "missus" it's short for mistress but you seem to have lost your sense of humour along with the r

mrz, I have a sense of humour. I don't see what was funny about your post. Apologies if that offends you, but meh.

You can start another AIBU thread to complain if you see Mr/Ms only as options on one form if you like - you're more than entitled. Be prepared for me to say something like "sympathy because you should have your title choice respected as it's so widely used, but i don't agree with your choice". Different strokes for different folks and all that.

"lost your sense of humour along with the r"

Eh? what r? now i'm confused

satnav?

the 'R' which distinguishes Mrs from Ms, I think. Along with a tacit implication that feminists are all humourless, perhaps?

OP is not BU. It's unbelievable that we are still expected to designate ourselves according to marital status.

Oh. Maybe just a bit thick rather than humourless, Joan

I thought she was referring to the fact that 75% of times when people refer to me here they write "fgr". As in, they miss out the first r. (fergie and my surname begins with r, hence the two).

nothing to do with feminists JoanofArgos

ok not wanting to derail the thead much more, but what does the missing R refer to then?

I go by Ms. It is a direct reaction to some iffy employment practices I've seen. I also don't wear my wedding ring to interviews. Occasionally I use Miss Maiden-Surname but rarely these days.

My martial status is my own business and I like the ambiguity of Ms.

What is the funny bit? That Mrs is short for 'mistress'? That's more in the nature of a true fact than a joke, surely?

Personally I would get rid of all titles and just use names - as in Oryx Crake, rather than Ms/Miss/Mrs Crake.

Having said that, if titles have to be used, I can't imagine why I would want my title to indicate my marital status, particularly as 'Mr' doesn't indicate marital status. Why would it be relevant in most situations?

Therefore I have always been Ms (since around 15 or 16), when I've been unmarried and when I have been married. I have never used either Miss or Mrs and if those were the only options in buying something online I wouldn't buy it.

Lady (or should that be Rear Admiral?) you're on

I don't see why they can't just let you write your own in-it would save a lot of bother.

Why should there be any title at all? I have credit cards from 3 different countries, none of them has any title on them. Just first name and last. No problems so far.

As said, it does not matter if a woman or a man is buying the tent, does it? Unless they will only send the "real" tents for men and women will get a pink sparkly "Women's tent"? And if you're a single woman, you will only get a single tent? Why else should it matter?

Excellent thread though, we can do a good Feminist bingo here.

I. Just. Don't. Care.
Does it matter? Will the world end because there was no 'Ms' option? Answer - NO!
You could have just left it blank. Honestly, there are people dying in the world, and you are fussing over not having the 'correct' (as you see it) title.
FFS.

I don't think it matters-I don't like being Ms-but on a scale of 1-10 it is trivial.

buildabridge thank you! i was just about to highlight the plight of the Japanese families torn apart by a natural disaster and global nuclear crisis, not to mention the Libyan's tearing eachother to shreds.

and there are people getting worked up over a title that means nothing other than people wanting to make a point!

BTW - I think everyone should be treated fairly and equally regardless of gender etc, but hate rants about petty things like Ms. It is a bugbear of mine.
Puts me right off 'feminism'...

Buildabridge - I would have left it blank but it wasn't an option.

Yes in the grand scheme of things it doesn't compare to Japan, of course not but I never suggested that it did

got confused between the two threads

sorry!

just trying to put a bit of perspective on the ishoo

yes it was an option, just don't tick any of them.
Or type in 'Ms' before your first name in the box.
Simples.