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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask would you be disappointed if you didn't get a card/ present for motherday

259 replies

AuntiePickleBottom · 28/03/2011 22:21

more of a discussion really.

over the school this seems like a hot topic, and some mums expect alot from there OH to deliver cards and presents.

as long as i get a card i really don't care

OP posts:
lurkerspeaks · 29/03/2011 23:02

My Mother always ask for well behaved children.

Hopefully at 33, 29 and 24 we will finally be able to oblige. However, I'm working and sis will be up a mountain so bro is in charge of buying / delivering a present.

Despite my attempts to get him to do otherwise she will be lucky to get a bunch of flowers and box of chocolates purchased from the garage / supermarket en route.

Just as well she loves us!

LadyLapsang · 29/03/2011 23:03

It's not Mother's Day - that's commercial rubbish - it's Mothering Sunday...

lizzielawson · 29/03/2011 23:06

No. I would rather my children remembered my birthday. Years ago I lost a baby over Mothers' Day, so now I accept the cards they have made for me with a good grace, but as they enter their teens and the "can't be bothered" stage, I won't grieve for a Mothers' Day card. The rest of the country doesn't know when my birthday is, so it makes it more personal when they remember it. My siblings and I have to make a big fuss over our mother with visits and cards etc so it makes it into a bit of a chore really.

TINKERBELLE33 · 29/03/2011 23:44

I'll be happy with a card from both DC. The first Mothers Day after having DC2 DH pulled out all the stops - chocs, flowers and a huge card. Shame I had to return the card as he forgot we now had 2 DC!

startail · 30/03/2011 00:12

Trying to persuade DD's I do not need a present, have just treated myself to an ipod to connect to my car, if I borrow theirs I get their playlists Biscuit

If they buy me a present they will simply blag extra pocket money to pay for it.
Bunch of flowers off Dh would be nice, but that will only happen if I remember to get him to go to Tescos on the way home on Friday. Not paying the florist in towns Mother's day prices.
He 's much better at mornings than me and gets DD1 off on her, horribly early bus and brews me coffee to get me started everyday. Normal at weekends he ordanises breakfast in bed, Mothers day he probably won't because DD1 is needed for the church choir.

skippitydoodah · 30/03/2011 00:23

Not bothered if I get nowt. Mind you, people like it if they get something to show they are loved and appreciated.

Squiffie · 30/03/2011 00:30

I asked my DH not to get me anything - I know my LO love me all year round!! As it happens this year I'm very lucky in being able to spend a lovely weekend away with my two babies!

supersalstrawberry · 30/03/2011 00:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Morloth · 30/03/2011 01:04

I don't give a damn if it is a commercialised hallmark holiday.

I had better get some pressies and a lie in and a nice lunch or I will have a tantrum. If DS1 makes a card that will be fussed over, but not bought cards, I just chuck 'em, bought cards are pointless.

You have to be a leettle bit difficult or people will get in the habit of forgetting you are actually a person and start expecting you to pick up their socks for them, seems to be a pretty common theme on Mumsnet.

Fuck that.

jjkm · 30/03/2011 01:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wabbit · 30/03/2011 01:53

I expect it will be about MY mum (as usual) grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

ElenStone · 30/03/2011 03:31

I'd be disappointed, DS is usually really thoughtful, so it'd be a shock. He's been asking for gemstones, wire and beads to make stuff lately, so I get the impression he's going to make me some jewellery this year. Which will be lovely, until I have to wear it Wink

whoamamma · 30/03/2011 03:59

I was just hoping for a day with dd and dh (first mothers day for me). Dh has invited pil and sil over. Great .

iscream · 30/03/2011 05:20

My dh never gives me a card or present on Mothers Day. He says I am not his mother. Hmpt! He always works on Sundays anyways, and leaves early to go visit him mom first on MD. But he did make sure the kids always had present and cards when they were little, now they remember on their own. They make me dinner and watch chick flicks with me without complaint, lol.
I would be very sad if the kids forgot me on Mothers Day.

weegiemum · 30/03/2011 08:30

A "little birdie" (ie dh) has suggested that this year as well as the normal stuff of flowers and Easter Eggs and misery, there may just be a pair of baby guinea pigs coming my way! I have been bereft of pigginess since last August (RIP Benny) and I love my piggies, so this year could be a turning point ........

Fanilla · 30/03/2011 09:20

I got a tumble drier last year.

This year I just want to not have to do anything for the day. A proper day off!

mamalovebird · 30/03/2011 09:50

Weegie - I know how you feel - my father died on Father's day so it can be a touch melancholic but I just have to let that go and enjoy it for my DP as it's his day now & I'd hate my DS growing up remembering me being all gloomy on father's day!

Good on you for not letting it get the better of you :)

HavingAnOffDAy · 30/03/2011 09:58

Cards & a pressie chosen by DD would be nice.

'Spect I'll end up with not much though - DH is rubbish like that

mamalovebird · 30/03/2011 09:58

I also find it hard with the plethora of 'aren't you a wonderful mother' type cards. My mum was the furthest thing away from being wonderful, caring supportive. In fact she was a cow who threw me out on my 16th birthday. But that was then and after nearly 20 years, we sort of have a relationship again, not that I'll ever forgive her for how she treated me. However, she is my mum and if I am adult enough to have built a few bridges I should also acknowledge her as my mum.

Although, her being crap has just taught me how to be everythign she wasn't so enjoy the day for you weegie, don't think about your mum.

QueenBathsheba · 30/03/2011 10:06

I have bought my own, DH is useless and with 2 DS I have come to the conclusion that I should just either treat myself or go without.

I took the DS to buy my mother a gift, we have chosen an old leather bound copy of the Water Babies because it was the first book she ever read.

anniemac · 30/03/2011 10:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Housemum · 30/03/2011 10:07

I wouldn't expect a card from DH himself, but I expect him to make sure the kids have either done something at school (the youngest 2) or gone to buy a card (don't think 6th form college does cutting & sticking!) Not fussed about a present, just having no housework to do that day would be my ideal. In my mind, that means him cleaning surfaces/washing up/cooking. In his mind that means cooking and leaving the clearing up for me to do the next day when he's at work! He even mentioned the idea of going to play golf on Sunday as he's missing Saturday's usual morning round so we can take the kids out. My look frightened birds out of the trees...

As he forgot my birthday yesterday, he knows he is in the doghouse already, so any slip-ups on Sunday and he'll be sleeping in the shed!

wilbur · 30/03/2011 10:38

My dcs are past the point of bringing cards home from nursery/school so dh does usually get them to at least sign a card he has bought. My ideal would be a bunch of daffs and the afternoon on the sofa watching a musical, so not a huge expecatation, but something of one. I never know what dh is going to do for days like these though, he is very random. We generally just do little tokens of affection at Valentines, for instance, but this year he went crazy and bought 2 really special gifts and I gave him 3/4 of a packet of Smarties....

chocadoodle · 30/03/2011 11:06

DS (2) is making his first Mothers Day card at playgroup this morning. He told me earlier :)

I told DH not to bother buying another card or flowers, really annoys me how they bump the price up for the occasion. That said, I bought my own Mum flowers yesterday for Mothers Day. I figured she'd get a nicer bunch for a tenner than she would if I were to buy them at the weekend, and she didn't mind having them early. DH will buy MIL some over the weekend and will probably get 6 flowers for the same price, but it'd be the end of the world if she was given them any day apart from Sunday Hmm.

What I'd really like is a lie in and dinner cooked for me for a change but that's not likely.

PurpleLostPrincess · 30/03/2011 11:25

We have a tradition in this house, that on birthdays and mothers/fathers days, the person it's for gets to relax all day and gets a 'day off'. So, just hoping for a lie in and for DH or the kids to make me tea when requested... I will also get my Mum something nice and go and visit her.

DH's mum wasn't much of a mum (understatement!) and I used to struggle to find a card that kept the wording simple and not about how wonderful she was/wasn't. Unfortunately she died in February, DH is still a bit raw from it (they hadn't spoken for a few years). I have asked him how he would like me to be and he said not to mention anything to him about her and to enjoy it for myself, bless him!

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