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AIBU?

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Original poster

Not cutting up grapes for my DD's 3rd Birthday party?

211 replies

cookinmama · 31/01/2011 21:51

It was my DD's birthday party at the weekend, I laid on a fab spread of food for the kids, ham & cheese sandwiches, mini sausages, some monster munch (DD's favourite) and some fruit namely Strawberries and grapes. Was a bit taken a back though when one of the other mum's grabbed the bowl of grapes away from her child, causing a bit of a tantrum and was then shocked to hear her tell her child that they weren't allowed them as they were not cut up. Hmm So should I have cut them in half or was the other mum being a bit PFB?

OP posts:
traceybath · 31/01/2011 22:22

Of course cookin its just that grapes are a bit notorious for being a particularly dangerous choking hazard.

And as I've said for me it would have just been worry about younger siblings really.

But I don't think you were wrong - at that age the parents are still there and supervising aren't they?

LadyBiscuit · 31/01/2011 22:22

Don't give children that age those rubbery snake sweets. My DS did choke on one of those and I had to pull it out of his throat (covered in blood) a few months ago.

Original poster
cookinmama · 31/01/2011 22:23

The only younger siblings were babies so wasn't catering for anyone younger than 3.

OP posts:
traceybath · 31/01/2011 22:23

But not all parents are as sensible as you Smile

We all have our foibles don't we?

LadyThumb · 31/01/2011 22:23

Bloody hell - how DID we survive in the 50s?

traceybath · 31/01/2011 22:24

Oooh LadyB - thats awful - must have been very frightening for him and you.

CameronCook · 31/01/2011 22:24

IME at a party kids are less likely to remember to bite into it as they'll be quite excitable or wrestling on the floor or chucking them in the air to catch them in their mouth or other daft things that kids do

LadyBiscuit · 31/01/2011 22:26

I thought he was mucking around at first tracey - just bloody glad I was in the same room as him.

If I do grapes at his party, I will cut them up after reading this thread

Ripeberry · 31/01/2011 22:26

My eldest is 8yrs old and I still cut up grapes. Too many horror stories of kids having grapes in shops and chocking to death Sad

reup · 31/01/2011 22:28

Am amazed 3 years old ate grapes at a party! I have catered for over 20 toddler groups parties and we always do some fruit and veg and most of it gets chucked. The parents put them on the kids plates and they ignore it!

Original poster
cookinmama · 31/01/2011 22:30

Would you believe that the fruit was the first to go, brought home sandwiches and cakes but the fruit was gone!

Must admit that after reading some of the horror stories will think twice before not cutting them up at the next party

OP posts:
traceybath · 31/01/2011 22:31

Did they have grapes in the 50's Wink

lockets · 31/01/2011 22:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BilboBloggins · 31/01/2011 22:39

I have never cut a grape in my life. YANBU

Dancergirl · 31/01/2011 22:41

Personally I wouldn't bother with grapes at a party. Too much faff, especially if you have to cut them up.

bubblewrapped · 31/01/2011 22:44

seriously, can 7 and 8 year olds not cut up their own grapes, or be trusted to bite them first?

really?????

ShowOfHands · 31/01/2011 22:46

I'm contrary. Because at home I never cut them and never have.

When dd takes grapes to preschool or if we have people with children round, I always chop them.

I know dd, I don't know other children.

GreenEyesandHam · 31/01/2011 22:50

Do adults cut up their own grapes? I don't. I don't even bite them first (unless the kids are getting the other bit lol)

I throw them in gob with careless abandon, I would imagine a lot of 7 and 8 year olds would as well.

But then I don't graze my shins or get scabby knees that often nowadays- some kids are just clumsy, so I don't think it's unreasonable to try and make sure they don't choke

Figgyrolls · 31/01/2011 22:50

Do you know it wouldn't even occur to me to cut them in half, but then dd won't eat grapes and ds isn't there yet, however next kids party IF we have grapes I shall ensure they are cut!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 31/01/2011 22:53

Blimey... I never cut up grapes for mine. He only really had them at picnics and they were always quite squashed by then.

Maybe that's the answer? Put them all in a bag, give them a good bash and out they go onto a plate... problem solved! Blush

Bumperrlicious · 31/01/2011 23:00

I wouldn't have made such a fuss as the mum but I would have discreetly bitten them in half for 3.5 yo dd. Not worth the risk. Don't care if people think pfb, I'll do the same for dd2 too.

cloudydays · 31/01/2011 23:03

We all decide what level of risk is acceptable for our children, though. Just because this other mum was at your house, surely you don't think she forfeits the right to make a food / safety decision for her own daughter, do you?

I don't know what others are referring to regarding this big overreaction she supposedly had. She didn't want her child to have a whole grape, so she took the grapes away from the child and explained why she was doing so. Seems a pretty proportionate reaction to me.

I hate all this "That's not how I do things so you must be PFB" garbage. You didn't have to cut the grapes in half, she didn't have to let her child have them whole. I've not yet seen a "OMG careless mum at party tried to give my baby whole grapes" thread tonight, so I'd have to say you're the unreasonable one for judging. :)

GColdtimer · 31/01/2011 23:04

Dd1, aged 4 nearly choked on a grape a few months ago. Took 5 huge back slaps to get it out. Therefore I would def cut up grapes for a party of 3 year olds.

cloudydays · 31/01/2011 23:05

twofalls that must have been terrifying.

twirlymum · 31/01/2011 23:06

A childminder near me had one of her mindees choke to death on a grape.
The paramedic managed to get one out with tweezers, but there was another stuck in the two year old child's throat Sad