To think Surestart groups are crap

[Pushmeinthepool]

and to never want to go there again!?

I went to a Surestart group for the first time this morning, with a friend. We normally go to a different toddler group but thought we'd give this one a go.

First of all, the "official" Surestart ladies standing observing all the mums. You just KNOW that they are looking for stuff to feed back to your HV about you.

Secondly, offering useless, unwanted advice to mums that are clearly competent. I know some mums don't give a stuff about their children and need to be told where they're going wrong, but honestly, surely it's able to tell one of those parents from a normal, competent parent?

My friend held her 7 month old baby boy on a rocker type thing, and immediately a do-gooder woman rushed over saying she must use the strap when he's on there. WTF?! She was holding him tightly and would hardly be likely to leave a baby on there unattended.

My 20 month old DS was running around, as kids do, under my watchful eye of course, and another of the SS ladies told me to be careful as he might run into one of the tables at the edge of the room and bump his head. She was about 18, I am a mid-thirties mum of 3. It's obvious that my child is clean, tidy, I wasn't swearing or shouting at him or ignoring him like some parents were to their kids. Surely I don't need to be told something like that. They even watched us all strapping our babies into their buggies at the end of the group.

Anyway, I think SS groups are just to try and catch parents out and for the SS workers to find fodder to tittle tattle to health visitors, so I won't be going again.

To the OP, you sound like a snob of the highest order, to be honest. I suggest you find a nice boden wearing toddler group where your little Tarquin can run around to his heart's content without risk of having to associate with proletarians' children.

Well Pushmeinthepool we only have your side of the story but if one of the staff there felt the need to intervene I suspect he was in danger of hurting himself and others (I assume there were other children there to bump into?). And tbh if my toddler was running around like a mad thing enough for someone to comment and I couldn't calm them down I would take them home.

pushmeinthepool - there are some excellent parenting courses that deal with the problem you describe.

They teach techniques such as distraction to avoid the meltdown, screaming blue murder situation.

Also, one handy tip is to sit down with your chid and play with them so that they are engaged and don't want to run off and scream at you otherwise. You probably know this though and just forgot.

There is one 'aim' actually of SStart sessions and that is to enable parents to spend time playing with their children. I will grant you that thay are not quite like some other groups that are about letting your children run riot while the adults carry hot tea over their heads and gossip. I've been to these - they have their place as it is about balance of probablity, i.e. me murdering the DC or jumping off a cliff myself versus me scalding them to death with said hot tea.

Do you know what, I will do just that, TheVisitor.

I for one don't want to socialise with smelly, dirty, gobby people and their tangled-haired, dirty-nappied children. Today confirmed that for me. And if you want to think I'm a snob, fine, I probably am, but I won't try and pretend to be "politically correct" like so many of you do on here and pretend to like that kind of person.

Good night lochneSSmonster!

Bit petty pushme.

I for one don't want to socialise with smelly, dirty, gobby people and their tangled-haired, dirty-nappied children

Blimey.

You're very passive aggressive aren't you, Hobbgoblin?

haha @ "that type of person" - don't judge a book by it's cover..........

lochness, I hope you've stuck around to read this. As the OP's apparent supporter you yourself have sunk to condecension as a tool for scoring in a debate. Ironic?

Do you think dye sounds like a snob, the visitor.

Sound defensive to me

Hell-in-a-handbasket lately MN.

"that kind of person"? Uneducated from a council estate makes them a lesser person than you, or just one who has had less opportunities? I have friends who live on a council estate. They even wear tracksuits. How "PC" of me.

FFS everywhere you look on here these days there are shit stirring numpties.

Pagwatch - dye? What do you mean? I'm not being defensive as it doesn't affect me directly, I'm just shocked at her sheer snobbery.

1 sentence of passive aggresive doesn't equal 'very' imo.

~I am fairly knowledgeable about surestart though

pushmeinthepool -

capital letter? that the best you can do? hilarious.

re not wanting to mix with the proles - that is your choice, i doubt anyone here will dispute it BUT you started a thread, i presume with the hope that other unpleasant types would rock up and support you?

i'm fully aware of the rules of grammer. this is a forum. whether i bother with captials or other syntax neither enhances nor takes away from the validity of my opinion. you ought to know that since you fancy yourself as middle class.

grammar*

My DCs are often messy and dirty. They often have bumps on their heads. I often take them to play sessions where they're definitely not really under my watchful eye as I talk to my friends... Maybe I should do more Surestart stuff so I can have some parenting advice

I know this is AIBU but this is really silly OP. So you didn't like it - so what? Just don't go back.

flame away but, and this is my first accusation ever he he

troll?

journo troll?

Thanks sungirl - I was about to call troll for the first time ever but chickened out.

Troll and a couple of sockpuppets perhaps hey ho this place is bloody bonkers at the moment.

hopelesslydisorganised - lets call it together.....

TROLL!!!

"weren't the SS the nazi super police. I can see paralells"

You're a DICK lochness.