to be speechless at this behaviour?

[Smuddy81]

My DH and DS (15months) were visiting the church where my father is vicar yesterday and as it was his 60th birthday there was fizz and cake after the service for all the congregation. My dad was having a great time and loved showing off his only grandchild to his flock (it was so lovely actually) but as he was talking to a couple of ladies from the church one of them had been coo-ing over DS and all of a sudden shoved a huge chunk of cake into his mouth!

I was at a distance looking on and wasnt able to get there in time to ask her what the hell she was doing but to say I was shocked was an understatement! I actually shrieked!

I have a few issues with this and tell me if IABU but surely having food shoved in your mouth when you're not expecting it (and even if you are) is a basic human rights violation! Also, what if he had an allergy she wasnt aware of. I let him have a bit of cake every now and again so thats not an issue but she even ask my dad if he was allowed any, she just shoved it in!

I'm sure DS didnt really mind although he was a bit taken aback! (He's BLW'd too so never really has anyone put food in his mouth for him!)

Maybe I've blown it out of all proportion but I was so shocked! She was an older lady if that's relevant? Is this just what they do!?

AIBU?

'SantosLHalper Mon 17-Jan-11 19:56:39

OldMumsy, they must love their children more than we do because we feed our children poison. I bet you even let yours play with plastic toys! Oh the shame. '

Guilty as charged. Hangs head...

Dont think this thread has attracted a bunch of mentalists, just people who can see the funny side of things.

Oddly enough, I too was at church yesterday and after the service some cakes and doughnuts were put out because one of our congregation had turned 80 and took them in for the children. She didn't shove them at babies though.
My DS was (I now see) a bit annoyed that no old ladies were around to force feed him so took matters into his own hands. Crawled up to table, stood up (he's 10 monhts) and pulled a whole plate of cakes onto the floor whereupon he started force feeding himself.

For shame

I can only but say a massive THANKS to everybody who has contributed to this thread. I have tears rolling down my eyes. Best laugh I've had in ages!!

I bet there were some parents who were furious that an old lady wanted to celebrate her birthday with doughnuts for the children! How dare she!

I remember when i went to visit a friend and she lived on a traveller site and one of the ladies there tried to give my 3 month old son an icepop , the fact that he could grasp it apparently meant he could eat it , i wouldnt of cared so much except it was a violent blue colur and he was wearing pastels
I think though OP you are being a teensy bit melodramatic , you have to remember that probably at least 90% of the population have no idea what blw is ,vast majority probably think its a cricket term. Give the nice lady a break and keep your shrieking to moments of real peril ,theres a dear

Before you all shriek racist ,the traveller site was of the crusty variety as opposed to the bona fide travelling folk , in retospect i should of been glad it was just an ice pop ,as later when my friend had returned to her senses ,she told me ,one woman use to give her children a hash cookie if they wouldnt go to sleep at night

Oh, ROF, I LOVE Madeira Gandhi.

I'd like a hash cookie...wistful....

OMG this is hillarious. Cake is good. YABU next time bring rice cakes or sugar free cake for your ds. Warn old ladies in advance. LOL

It was dumb of her, as you say, baby could have had allergies. But no harm done this time right?
Perhaps, next birthday cake lady attends...but sneaking up and shoving a piece of cake in her face mouth?

Nah...too mean, but fun to think of.

DS2's idea of BLW is to take the arm off anyone who is holding food in his vicinity.

I try to explain to people that he bites, but he also looks like an angel with huge blue eyes, rosy cheeks and golden curls.

More than one person has reeled back in pain after offering him food.

FFS! (and I don't usually swear!) Can no one see how bad this could have been? Op's strange human rights issues aside.
If thast had been my DD she would have been violently sick and screaming in pain for 2 days over a 'little piece of cake!'
My post earlier seems to have been conveniently ignored in order to continue ridiculing OP.
It's NOT acceptable to feed anyone else's child without at least checking with the parent first, basic manners, church goer or not.

Presumeably, though, if the baby in question had had severe food allergies, the grandparent holding him would have known this, and would have been far more alert for anyone in the baby's vicinity with food they were allergic to, and would have acted swiftly to intercept the cake.

That said, though, I do think that you are right that the lady should have asked first - I wouldn't give a baby food without asking first, 'is it OK for him to have a spot of cake/sausage/whatever?'

Hullygully -

"This is the sort of thing thsat happens when you let an elderly congregation play fast and loose with booze and carbs"

GENIUS ,thanks for cheering me up

and boffinmum_

"FFS chill woman. What joy is there in old age if you can't force feed the occasional passing child"

THANK YOU

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple ... at the very least

Fiveisanawfully... I get where you're coming from. My son would also have been made ill by the cake, and it would have put us off track for two weeks and I would have been irritated beyong belief.

However, what I find funny about the op is the fact that she "lets him have a bit of cake now and again" and "Ds didn't really mind"... so you have a child who DOES eat cake and enjoyed the cake in question causing his barking shocked mother to SHRIEK and invoke human rights abuses.

Madness!

Wow! Thanks everyone. I have loved hearing all your comments! Massive apologies for my 'Human rights' comment. It really wasnt meant literally (not that anyone cares now!)

But most of all, you should know that he'd already had some cake. I'd already given him a little slice, because I'm his mother, and I can do that!

(This is not about cake!)

Well dine for being a good sport, Smuddy

We took DS on hol to Greece when he was 9 weeks old and a man we met at a village event was doing 'coochy coo' type communication with DS, and suddenly stuck his rather agricultural-looking finger in his mouth for him to suck - I didn;t really register it (negligent mother) but dp, who was holding him at the time, was apalled. I think he pulled ds back and just about managed not to shriek

I can't believe how much criticism you've received. This is an outrage, and perhaps yet another reason for why we need to question whether or not religion is something we want in the modern world.

Well done Smuddy, it is nice to have someone come back and not be scared off! You gave everyone a good laugh, if nothing else.
Glad he has tried cake, eating is meant to be sociable and pleasurable and I can only think that the poor little 17month old who had organic rice cakes (I wonder if he was allowed a rice cake that wasn't organic?)as a treat didn't have a special cake for his 1st birthday, or maybe he did and the adults ate it and left him out!
I agree that it isn't nice to have cake pushed in your face, but if he never has worse things happen he will be a lucky DS!

15 weeks? YANBU? 15 months? YABU.
I once looked round a nursery that gave the children RYVITA as snacks. When I went into the next one and saw them doing b/day cupcakes for a 3 year old's bday I signed up right there and then.