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Original poster

to not 'do' santa?

441 replies

jmt2211 · 30/11/2010 21:27

I don't believe in Santa and refuse to lie to my child about it. The first year he could ask about it was when he was 3 and I just said that lots of people liked to believe in Santa but really he was just pretend.
I have yet to find a single person who has done the same, even if I can get them to agree in principle, no one will agree in practice. I'd love to hear what others think (other than that I am a Scrooge) and see if anyone agrees with me....

OP posts:
nooka · 03/12/2010 07:45

I have read all the thread. I've contributed to it several times too. I'm not missing the point. I just have a very different point of view. One that doesn't take 'Santa is very important' as my starting point. It's not that unusual!

nooka · 03/12/2010 07:48

My children found Santa difficult to understand without explanation, and they like to ask questions. A 'we just don't do it' really would not have cut it for them. It didn't for God either, and as I like talking to them about abstract concepts we usually go some way beyond "that's how it is" type explanations. I'm not going to shut conversations down just because other people might not like the answers I give to my own children.

nooka · 03/12/2010 07:50

But in any case at no point in this thread did the OP say that she was somehow training her child to go about telling other children that Santa wasn't real, so that is a bit of a straw dog IMO. She just said Santa was pretend. Which he is.

pongonperdy · 03/12/2010 07:52

Poor little child. I bet you've told him mummy and daddy will get old one day and die. Or do you just pick and choose what truths you tell them. Childhood should be about innocence and magical times. Not the cold hard truth. I hope you have told him not to tell all the other mights at nursery.

littlebabynothing · 03/12/2010 08:04

I very rarely post but feel compelled to ask why people feel so strongly about this? Surely you raise your children how you see fit and if that doesn't match with how another child is raised - you deal with it?

TyraG · 03/12/2010 08:15

Still missing the point.

She clearly stated that she didn't care if her kid ruined it for other kids. THAT is the problem I have with her.

littlebabynothing · 03/12/2010 08:23

But why should that be her focus - yes of course we should be considerate of other peoples way of raising their children but not if it means being unable to explain that something is or isn't true.

As an atheist with Christian friends and family I tell my DC that I dont believe god exists but such and such does. My DD in particular often tells other children that god isn't real - whilst I try to prevent it, when it happens it is not my problem to deal with.

I'm not trying to be argumentative, I really don't get the vitriol

altinkum · 03/12/2010 08:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

maryz · 03/12/2010 08:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jumpty · 03/12/2010 08:36

It's really not that hard, "DS, we as a family don't believe there's a Santa Claus but all of your friends do believe it and get very excited about him. Let's feel smug because realise that we know what's true but don't spoil their fun by telling other kids their parents are liars". Job done.

We are actually in this exact position because we have family who do the Easter Bunny. DCs are under strict instructions not to spoil it for their cousins.

That is the issue.

Jumpty · 03/12/2010 08:38

Buggered up strike through again. Gah.

EldritchCleavage · 03/12/2010 13:08

I find the whole thing very odd too. I posted in support of the not doing Father Christmas aspect of the OP (not the rest: I simply would not take it upon myself to interfere with other families' way of doing things). I didn't think it was that unusual and I must say I was taken aback by the strength of negative feeling directed at the 'No to FC' faction.

Mind you, while I did get cross with one post directed at me I responded on the thread rather than asking for it to be deleted.

I have to say, while I think a lot of the OP's comments were pretty unfortunate, I can't see that she deserved the vitriol directed at her. The backlash was out of proportion to the original offence.

Anyway, she's gone now apparently, and probably just as well if she's a rather tender flower.

missmoopy · 03/12/2010 21:56

Thankyou Jumpty Xmas Grin I was offended. But i didn't run off to mumsnet to get her posts deleted because I am a grown up!

maxybrown · 03/12/2010 22:03

well, actually, Saint Nick, ISN'T "pretend" he was absolutely very real.

I believe anyway, don't care what anyone thinks Xmas Grin I love Father Christmas, love love love him, long may he last Xmas Grin

colditz · 06/12/2010 21:28

I think, at the heart of this, it is not ok to piss on a 3 year old's cocopops.

mrsoliverramsay · 06/12/2010 22:12

I woke up when I was 7 or 8 very early Xmas morning and went down to peek at what I had. I saw Santa with mum and dad. Santa was calculating the cost of the presents on his calculator. I went back up bed and when I woke I told them what I saw. They just laughed but I was adamant that I had saw him and that even the presents were the same (we didn't get our stuff wrapped up, just layed out on floor). In the end they told me he wasn't real to shut me up. I just laughed and said I felt silly for going on about it. No big deal. It doesn't scar you for life

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