On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat *2024*

[Swannyb]

@amdone123 @mj20 @touty @Hohofortherobbers @Coppergate7 @bigbus @colouringindoors @wellitywellness @Atacamadesert @Freezingfeetwarmheart @WouldRatherBeAPieceOftToast @Hohofortherobbers @mickandrorty @Mykittensmittens @afaloren @NoTeaNoShade @CrackersCheeseNoWinePlease @LynnThese4reSEXPEOPLE @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

@sixthvestibule a stone is brilliant, well done. 😇

Morning, folks, how are we all doing ?
Not too bad here. Bank Holiday Monday was quite bad, but I've refrained since then.
Day 4 and for some reason I'm thinking of having a drink this evening. I really don't want to though. I'm going out on Sunday and I'd rather wait, plus I want to weigh myself Saturday.

OK, plan - do not take purse to work. I finish about 5pm - walk home, relaxing evening with no alcohol.
I know if I drink this evening, I'll smoke and I'll be hungover tomorrow when my granddaughters visit, so NO !!!!

Hi all, hope you’re doing okay. I’m 13 weeks sober, but struggling a bit, would love a glass of white wine or two, it’s getting warmer here now which doesn’t help with the cravings.

@Touty well done on 13 weeks, that's brilliant. You've done really well.
I know it's hard, the craving and I know you don't want to go back to how you were. I'd struggle with the weather getting nicer, too.

Hi everyone! How are we all? I’m still hanging in there AF. Easter weekend was hard. I think it’s the diet that’s making my down time a bit frustrating as I’d love to have more flexibility with food, but I don’t think I’m missing alcohol too much! I keep telling myself I don’t have the capacity for a hangover right now! It’s getting me through.

Hello everyone ! Still AF or moderating a lot. I'm allowing myself one beer in the very hot Asian evenings. Last week of an exciting adventure and I'm having 4 days to relax before starting my return journey.
Haven't been able to do a catch-up read so I just hope that everyone is doing well.
Sending sweaty positive vibes to you all. SSS

I am back having posted on alcohol support under different usernames. Always ending up at square one. I have been necking a bottle of wine at night, sometimes quite a bit more.

Today I felt tired (don't get hangovers just have rubbish sleeps). I have had two cans of beer. Tomorrow I aim to have one or preferably none. But the priority just now is not to touch the wine. Hope everyone is doing well. Solidarity to anyone struggling.

@YoghurtPotWashingMachine hi and welcome. I'm the same regarding wine. I can moderate sometimes ( Friday night, I had 2 glasses of red wine), but yes, it's white wine I need to stay away from.
Do you have it in ? I try to not buy it after work, etc - if it's not in, I can't drink it.

@Amdone123 Unfortunately I have six bottles of Virgin wine in the cupboard. Trying to pretend it's not there :/

Hello @YoghurtPotWashingMachine good luck with your plan! I always have wine in the house but sometimes I can manage it and sometimes i turn into a wine monster! I’m on holiday at the moment so have not had many AF days but managed a day off the booze today - I had a bottle of Nanny State which was actually really nice.

Nice to hear from you @Swannyb - I hope you are having a great time!

Hi all!!!
late night posting!!! But not the usual wide awake because I drank!!! Still A/f (not sure what day…. Just accepting this as my new norm) but think it’s prob about day 15?
not sure why I’m awake just one of those nights! But thought I’d check in and say hi. Good catching up on everyone’s news @Swannyb @Amdone123 @Nowstrong @Bigbus

Just checked! It’s day 17!!!! Pleased with that!

Hello @Mj20 well done on day 17! I am not doing is well. I’m trying to reduce my units to under 20 a week but last few weeks have all been at least 30. I’m on holiday at the moment and despite drinking less than I would have previously im
still way over. I’m back home on Saturday and will get my self properly back in the game then. I have some found some really nice alcohol-free stuff that I enjoy so that helps as well. I think maybe I just need to have a good run of being AF to reset a bit.

@Bigbus one thing that helped me on holiday was to stop feeling entitled to have a great time on holiday because this stopped me justifying my drinking. It was a way of catching my brain out! Another fun thing I did was challenge myself to see how alcohol makes holidays worse (because my brain would always go to alcohol making holidays better).

@change2022 ooohh, I love that way of thinking. It is about changing your mindset. I'll have a think about that. I have changed the way I holiday in the past few years - I've made progress but yes, thoughts of holiday still sometimes include alcohol.
@Bigbus it's good you're thinking about it though and making a plan. You can reset it.
@Mj20 day 17 is great, well done. I'm normally awake 3am ish ( not always alcohol related either !), but I've been sleeping better thank god. Basically, I ignore the dog - quite hard to do when a cute pom is practically sat on one's head 🤣
I drank Sunday but ate as well so I wasn't hungover Monday. Day 4 here and I've been ok this week - busy really, spring cleaning, walking, looking after my babies. Helps to keep busy, in my case.
Even though I'm back working ( only 20 hours), I was considering 'retiring' again Jan 2025, but as my best friend told me - ' I think you're better off working!'
He has a good point.

I did ok at moderating (by my standards) on Monday and Tuesday but had too much last night. A bottle of red and one beer over several hours. Trying to stay straight again tonight.

@change2022 in the last I would have averaged a bottle a night on holiday - 70 units. I’ve halved that with no sense of deprivation but it’s still 35 units for the week!

@YoghurtPotWashingMachine at least your start to the week was better. You can do this evening af ❤️

@Amdone123 sounds positive your end! You’re very good at planning and structuring to achieve your goals!!! And I agree with your friend, working/routine can be better for us!!! @Bigbus sounds like your making some improvements and have a plan, but must say I love @change2022 advice!!!!! Think it’s applicable to us all really! Love the idea of changing my perspective!!!!

no plans to drink here for the foreseeable. Moving more, working hard and eating better! Sober really suits me! I just remember this xxx

@Mj20 glad you found my comment helpful. It's actually a lot of fun to call our brains out on what they're thinking!

How is everyone? I have been reading all the posts. Last week I didn't stick to my 14 units because of the Easter holidays and I thought I'd let my hair down a bit, but I didn't get drunk or anything that gave me hangxiety, I just didn't have many alcohol free days!
This week (still the hols) I've still felt like I've enjoyed myself but only had 11 units over 2 days, so yesterday had AF drinks at a BBQ and tonight I'm out but going to have a coke instead of wine. I don't even feel like I'm missing out. Then again I know I'm having a few drinks on Tues for my sister's birthday, so I will appreciate it more having had a break in between!

@Flumpywoo sounds like you're being mindful and balancing it out - and it's good to have a break, knowing you're out on Tuesday.

All ok here. I drank yesterday. Took 2 bottles of wine to a family gathering but only ended up drinking 1. I wanted to carry on once my granddaughters had gone home, but couldn't be bothered.
Today I could have drank but I didn't want to go out for it. So, tea it is.

I'm hoping Mon to fri I can be af as I'm going on holiday on Saturday for 5 nights. Yay.

@Amdone123 well done on only having the 1 bottle and then not drinking. It's the little wins like that that we should be proud of ourselves for. Enjoy your holiday!!

I have hit rock bottom. I need to vent about something and I was going to do a new post on the relationships forum but I figure I will get less judgement here. I need to ironically pour a glass of wine first though. I have fucked everything up.

Ok so deep breathe, deeper glug of the wine.

So I have been drinking every day for at this point I do not know how long. I had a bit of a breakdown last year, alcohol did not help, and my ex broke up with me. I did not take this well at all and to cut a very long story short basically have stalked him online since then. He blocked me everywhere but I opened a new account to stalk his fb and another thing he has. That is bad enough however then the wine got opened and I have actually made up so many things in my head about him liking other womens posts and all that that I have been driving myself insane so then I go and have another drink.

All was fine till recently I decided (sober for a change) that I really wanted to speak to him. Now he has made it very clear he does not want to talk to me but I sent him a letter (letter) outlining what I needed to talk to him about. No response. I then decided ok I am a strong woman the usual stuff, opened the wine and became not so strong. I pm'd him from my fake fb account and told him he would not be happy till I was foot under. I then woke up the next day ashamed at myself and went to the fake account to find he had blocked me so I deactivated it although he has potentially reported it anyway. Then yesterday I was getting all my ducks in a row, plans for everything etc and then the wine. I sent his sister a message from my actual fb account. I woke this morning and vomited when I remembered it so now I have removed my own actual account too. It is good as I can no longer stalk anyone and now I can never reopen it because I will remind myself forever as to how low I have gone.

It is ALL drink. I know I am the nicest person on the planet sober. I would do anything for anyone and am called 'the salt of the earth' by anyone who knows me but they do not know drunk me. They do not even know how much I drink.

I am fully ashamed of myself and have rang to see my doctor this week but of course despite everything they cant see me till midweek instead of today so I opened the wine. I have already convinced myself today is the day I stop. Today is the day I stop obsessing about my ex. Today is the last day I sit like this feeling sorry for myself and that as of tomorrow everything will be different. But like every other day I have done this I will end up crying into my wine glas later and thus the circle continues.

The kids are thankfully with their dad. My friends have absolutely no idea the extent of my drinking and certainly not the stalking of my ex (not the kids dad). It is at the point where if the police arrived at my door now I know it would be for harassment.

I need help. I need advice. I need a slap across the head. Help me?