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Alcohol support

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Original poster

Alcohol has destroyed me

244 replies

startingover202 · 04/07/2023 19:54

I have ruined my relationship, my family and my health through drinking wine every day.
I am on day 3 of not drinking. I've had anxiety and shaking and my sleeping is bad but I'm determined not to drink.
I was shaking and anxious everyday after a drink as well as constant diarrhoea so I have to ride this out.
I'm slightly better today so hoping tomorrow will be better.
Has anyone else had withdrawal symptoms?
Alcohol services kept telling me not to completely stop but that wasn't helping.

OP posts:
Original poster
startingover202 · 22/07/2023 19:43

@jays
I've definitely failed

OP posts:
jays · 22/07/2023 19:45

startingover202 · 22/07/2023 19:43

@jays
I've definitely failed

But how many times have you succeeded and you don’t give yourself credit for that. Every single one of us has failed. But you’ve also succeeded. And you have to choose to keep

jays · 22/07/2023 19:49

Posted too soon … keep on keeping on or just go under. Your only real option is to keep on keeping on. I swear I know how hard it is and how great you feel when you’re strong and how disgusting and vile and pointless you feel when you’re not. But you need to make the successes bigger and the failures smaller. You matter. I don’t even know you and you matter to me. If you’re still here, you can still turn it around. There’s no such thing as perfect and there’s no such thing as not fucking up. Please be way kinder to yourself than your being. You deserve to love you.

Original poster
startingover202 · 22/07/2023 19:51

@jays
Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
startingover202 · 22/07/2023 19:52

@jays your post made me cry

OP posts:
Thestartofsomethinggood · 22/07/2023 19:58

Can you put it down now. Have a big glass of water and go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day. 💐

jays · 22/07/2023 19:59

startingover202 · 22/07/2023 19:52

@jays your post made me cry

Because you know it’s true. You mean something, you mean something! You have not failed. You haven’t. You’re here. That’s all there is. That’s a win. And you’re a fighter and I’m not saying that without havering already read all your posts. You are anything but a failure. I know what it feels like to feel like that and I know how black the hole is when you’re down there but you’re not meant to be there, that’s why you’re fighting and when you’re fighting you’re not failing. 🤗💖🤗💖. You can do this. It’s brutal, but you can. Had you have been doing it. I think having read your posts, I think you’re amazing.

GiddyGladys · 22/07/2023 21:01

If you're in London, find a meeting tomorrow and go. It'll help you.

blahblahblah1654 · 22/07/2023 21:19

I wouldn't wait to hear back from AA. Just bite the bullet and go to a meeting tomorrow.

StSwithinsDay · 22/07/2023 22:08

You need to go to your gp and get proper medical support. Probably inpatient rehab too.

keffie12 · 22/07/2023 23:30

blahblahblah1654 · 22/07/2023 21:19

I wouldn't wait to hear back from AA. Just bite the bullet and go to a meeting tomorrow.

This: I totally agree with. I'm a long term member of A.A. There can be many good reasons you didn't get a call back, including a misheard phone no or digit written down or you have missed a call on your phone. It happens. It's life.

The people who ring you back are long-term sober members, as are the people on the helpline. No one is paid for this service. It is done voluntarily.

Go on the A.A website and find a meeting for your area. If you want this you need to go to any lengths.

The link is below which will take you to the meetings list on the website.

https://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/aa-meetings/find-a-meeting

Find a Meeting | Alcoholics Anonymous - Great Britain

Please select a county or time using the tools on the form to search our database. Search results will appear and placemarkers will indicate locations of meetings in the interactive map.

https://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/aa-meetings/find-a-meeting

Original poster
startingover202 · 23/07/2023 06:13

@GiddyGladys
Where in London?
I finish work at 18.30

OP posts:
TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:19

I'm so sorry alcohol services are shit. It's all well and good for them to say carry on drinking, it's dangerous, but they can't come up with a detox and service quickly when you need them. And the trouble is when you are drinking again it's almost impossible to attend all the appointments you need to.

TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:21

StSwithinsDay · 22/07/2023 22:08

You need to go to your gp and get proper medical support. Probably inpatient rehab too.

If only it was this quick and this simple. But it doesn't work this way and the alcohol treatment services don't have it right.

TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:23

They closed down the only inpatient alcohol detox in London last year. There is no detox services in London right now so they are trying to do detox in the community instead.

TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:24

Unfortunately what's on offer doesn't work for most alcoholics and drug addicts.

TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:28

They also take almost every penny from the addict seeking treatment and leave them with about £26. Per week. How is that going to work for an older woman?

TRexTara · 23/07/2023 06:30

That's if you manage to get into rehab. Trust me that will be a fight.

We have nothing to offer our addicts and drug addicts in this society.

mycatcontrolsmewith5g · 23/07/2023 06:32

I've known some very seriously addicted alcoholics and I have to say it was only AA who have helped them and they are now living good and productive lives in sobriety.. I have a huge amount of respect for AA. Best of luck to you xx

brightspice90DaysLater · 23/07/2023 07:03

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

BigGreen · 23/07/2023 07:23

I don't think you have failed @startingover202. I see someone who has hugely cut down her drinking. And who is learning to sit with a lot of psychological pain. You're on the journey. I'm sorry that alcohol services have been so unhelpful.

You mention distressing thoughts - could you refer yourself for some counselling? Some areas have IAPT which you can self refer (give it a Google). Or your workplace might have an EAP Employee Assistance Programme where you can access support confidentially. Sending you a hug.

Original poster
startingover202 · 23/07/2023 07:30

Yes I would like counselling.
I need to find a way to deal with my feelings other than alcohol.
I think I do have EAP

OP posts:
Anythingbutsnow · 23/07/2023 07:39

Try the chat now service on the AA website, you can chat to someone in real time. Its manned by recovered aa members,they will be able to help you get to your first meeting.

Original poster
startingover202 · 23/07/2023 07:53

I've tried the chat onAA and it's never available.
I really have tried to reach out for help.
I suppose that's why I'm worried AA won't help either.

OP posts:
BigGreen · 23/07/2023 08:06

Why don't you give the EAP helpline a call today? It's usually on a page on your organisation's intranet. They support staff members from many different companies and should have a pathway for self-medicating with alcohol. I see how much you're trying. You can do this Flowers