The continuing support thread for living alcohol-free. Everyone welcome.

[Blackberryblossom]

Hello and welcome to the alcohol free support thread. Many thanks to @wendywagon for holding the reins on the last thread, and to drybird for starting the original thread about 3 years ago.
We’re a broad community who have all chosen to live alcohol free for good. There’s support here whatever your stage on that journey. Whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love all the successes of whatever shape and size, and have all been there too when things get challenging.
Thank you too @rep22 @onewildandpreciouslife for offering to back up host too. I thought there was someone else but I can’t find the post.

Thank you lads.
I never cancel but today I felt grim. I am coming up to the anniversary of my dad's passing on Friday. It's always a tough day. I don't want to be drinking. That's when my alcoholism took hold (I am happy with that description, some are not). My friend is lovely really but blunt and says it how it is. My boxy house would illicit rude comments and I can't do the judgement this week. I'm a messy cow but a sober one x

@WendyWagon oh, bless you. No wonder you weren't up to it. It's nearly the anniversary of my dad's sudden passing too. Five years, but it seems like yesterday. It's not fair, is it? It's always grim, but anniversaries are a fresh stab.

I'm with you on the judgemental comments too. I live in a HA property that's tiny, very messy and disorganised, but it's mine and I am lucky to have it. Anyone with snippy comments and judgement can get to right royal f-ck.

Your home is fabulous and will always be - because it's got you in it.

Big hugs to you, and wags and snuffly licks from the dog. xxx

An Allen Carr book helped me stop smoking 12 years ago (I never had so much as a craving once I finished the book and I was 15 years on 20 a day. I loved smoking and was surprised how easy it was to stop)

I hope the stop drinking book works for you in a similar way 🤞

WW don't feel guilty about lunch. You did what you had to do to protect yourself, your feelings and your sobriety. Hopefully your friend being AF is positive for your relationship but ultimately you don't have to spend time with people who make you feel shit and cause you stress.

Hi everyone. I'm just back from a sober camping holiday...my first since I was a small child! There were times I missed it but then I thought about the downside...waking up hot, sweaty, sleep deprived with overexcited children and a hangover...suddenly being sober wasn't so bad!!

Hearty waves to all the AF gang. Welcome @drinktilisink and @PankWuffin - 2 weeks is brilliant - well done!

Ah, @WendyWagon you got to do what you got to do and if that bailing so be it - protecting your sobriety is so important!

Day 40 today - whoa ho! I have my second interview of the week tomorrow and I really want it. I have researched and prepped and can do no more! Fingers crossed!

Rough old day today. Been feeling a niggling anxiety rising over the last few days, and my dreams have been very vivid. I'm about 5 weeks into sobriety, but it's all only really kicked off this last week.

I was supposed to start a shadow shift for a new zero hours job tomorrow and called to cancel, feigning GI bug. I just feel like I have absolutely no emotional resilience all of a sudden. I suppose I'm running out of "quitting" energy

Hang in there @Sillymummies123 . You know that drinking won’t make any of this better, but I’m sorry it feels so tough at the moment.

Well done on your 40 days @Minutebyminute ! Good luck with the interview today.

Morning all.
@Minutebyminute good luck for the interview. I have done a fair few this year and hope not to need to do them again! (a friend and I are buying an established company). It's a lovely elegant brand.

My boozy friend left me alone yesterday and I got a bit done house wise.
The DS is moving back home on Sunday and that will really help me. He's great with DIY and inspires my DH. It will be like Nick Knowles and co! He also doesn't drink but eats vast amounts of meat and potatoes. No cold potato is safe. Ditto bananas. Good job I have two larders and two fridges.
I think he will be getting married quite young. He is a home bird.

Off to pick the DD up later. She has an interview tomorrow. Have a good day my friends.

Hello 👋

Just checking in again.

@Minutebyminute thank you and ood luck in your interview! I am looking for a new job at the moment too. I feel like my job is a bit of a dead end / sticky floor situation so just casually looking for something new.

@Sillymummies123 I am not af 5 weeks yet, so not really able to advise, but hope you can hang on! I've had a few moments but they have passed thankfully.

I had a weird dream last night (I know that's quite common). Usually when I quit alcohol I get the dreams where I drink loads and wake up in a panic and then relief that I didn't really drink. But last night I dreamt about going out and not drinking and having an amazing time. I am praying that is a sign I might be on the right track this time. I am trying not to hang on by my finger nails and to think positively about sobriety. Only day 15 for me today so we will see, but I honestly do think I feel better this time

Good morning!
I’m on Day 13. Enjoying The Sober Diaries.
I’ve treated myself to some Jo Malone with the money I’ve saved.
Have a good day. Xx

Morning all.

Nothing report really. More boxes, more rain!

Morning all. Yesterday was tough but good. Had one of my regular check ups with my gynaecologist/ oncologist to check there’s no signs of my vulval cancer returning. All clear, thankfully. But the emotional build up to that is tough - MUCH easier than when I was drinking as I am much better at dealing with the anxiety, but still hard work. I was really emotional after the appointment, and exhausted last night, but that’s all ok. Can just keep on keeping on now!

Hope everyone has a good sober Friday evening planned- hangover free Saturday mornings never get old!

Morning everyone. Gradually reading the thread and hope to remember names soon!

Day 18 here. Told DP last night I went to AA the other day. He didn't say much... A bit 'Oh, right.' I said I'd been worried about my drinking for a while. (On my other thread I sad I didn't want to tell him yet) We chatted about me going back to therapy and then started disagreeing about something (big and important). I let him go to bed alone and usually I'd get a drink but had an AF lager and watched telly for an hour.

Woke up with a terrible headache like the old days weirdly.

Good plans this weekend all of which I'd usually drink throughout (friends and theatre, brunch, an exhibition thing, a concert - lots going on). Interested to see how much I enjoy it all sober. Tonight for example I'd definitely go for a drink (or two or three) before meeting my friend for another drink then get a drink at the theatre before and during the show and try and get one after too... But with plenty happening I think I'll prefer to be hangover free.

Hope everyone else has some nice plans? TFI Friday!

Morning my AF lovelies - a grey day outside but bright sunshine in my house - I got the job i interviewed for yesterday - perfect role, perfect hours and majorly less stressful - I am thrilled!

6 weeks ago today I woke up with a killer hangover and spent the day with my head over the toilet telling my teenage children I had a ‘tummy bug’. 6 alcohol free weeks on and I feel more physically well, anxiety dropped and in the the right headspace to make positive changes in my life! Who knew the poison in the bottle was causing the majority of my problems (well I knew of course but chose to ignore it 😭!)

Good wishes to all wherever you are on your AF journey. Who knows where mine will take me, but today I am not drinking!

And thank you for the good luck vibes for the interview yesterday @WendyWagon @PankWuffin @Onewildandpreciouslife - it was a fantastic boost to my confidence!

Congratulations @Minutebyminute that’s brilliant! When do you start?

I have picked up the family cold. Not impressed. In bed with the strongest decaf coffee I could make and a multipack of tissues.

@Minutebyminute congratulations!

Hope you feel better soon @Blackberryblossom

Excellent news @Minutebyminute

it is no coIncidence that this has happened once you got sober

@Minutebyminute ooh congratulations. How wonderful.

I had some good news of my own having passed for the goverment business support. Good luck must have been in the air!

I think six weeks of AF makes a huge difference to your body and mind. The booze is out of your system and your skin has turned over new cells, so we all look fab. Both great confidence boosters.
Keep going.

@Minutebyminute and @WendyWagon well done both on your respective work successes.

Back from the extended family all inc holiday. Still sober. One or two ‘what if’ moments but 18months sobriety was not going to be spoiled by me. Although there is probably another 2 years therapy… better to have been able to see the patterns and although I’m not fixed, I managed to objectively work through the emotions and stored some for when therapy starts up again in September. Now to tackle the washing mountain…

@Minutebyminute brilliant news on the job, that's fantastic. Many congratulations.

@drinktilisink well done for telling your DP, that was very brave. I hope the big things gets resolved without too much hassle and heartache. x

Hovering ex-boyf wants to meet the dog at the weekend. He has suggested a local steam fair. If the dog cannot command dominance over his farts it may be fair steamier than he imagines. I made some Slimming World veg curry last night, which called for two teaspoons of curry powder. I put in two tablespoons. 😷Actually, it was very nice ('twas only mild curry powder). I may proffer leftovers to the dog. Biological weaponry can be a useful ally. 😘

Strength and love to you. Have a great weekend. x

Ah thank you so much for all the good wishes - I’m running on happy AF vibes at the moment 😊!

@TooOldForThisNonsense completely - my half arsed attempts at job hunting whilst drinking were a disaster! This is a stone cold sober good decision that wouldn’t have been possible whilst alcohol clouded my judgement!

@WendyWagon flinging my good luck dust your way as well!

@Blackberryblossom I have an 8 week notice period but am going to wait for formal offer letter before handing in my notice. So end of Oct/beginning of Nov start date hopefully?

I've been AWOL - knee deep in shocking UCAS and Uni admin problems that nearly saw ds lose his firm offer despite meeting their requirements- apparently because he's an independent student not with a school. He's great and has done it all himself but I have been constant phone companion and lifts duty and I'm quite behind with work.

Anyway I can see that @Minutebyminute has celebrations! Hooray! I'm sure there are others and I will catch up. Love to all.