The continuing support thread for living alcohol-free. Everyone welcome.

[Blackberryblossom]

Hello and welcome to the alcohol free support thread. Many thanks to @wendywagon for holding the reins on the last thread, and to drybird for starting the original thread about 3 years ago.
We’re a broad community who have all chosen to live alcohol free for good. There’s support here whatever your stage on that journey. Whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love all the successes of whatever shape and size, and have all been there too when things get challenging.
Thank you too @rep22 @onewildandpreciouslife for offering to back up host too. I thought there was someone else but I can’t find the post.

@Onewildandpreciouslife I am sorry - what difficult situations and uncertainty you have at the moment. I am certain alcohol would not help though and hope you can push on through.

I had a sober victory today. My daughter came home from a week away today and said mum you look fab, really pretty and you have lost weight around your face. I think I have lost some of my alcohol ‘moon face’ but nice that someone else recognised it. My clothes are feeling looser around my stomach and I am not so bloated. So I am seeing the physical health benefits as well as the mental health ones!

So Day 18 and today I will not drink!

@Onewildandpreciouslife
That's really hard - thank god for not drinking right now.

@Minutebyminute 6 weeks (just over) for me and the weight is coming off gradually every morning on the scales. I've had a few people comment too, which was lovely.

Just came on to say - what a gift going into the summer holidays sober! Instead of wondering what time it is acceptable to drink on these long days finding activities for the kids.

I have potentially breaking news! Dp and I are away for the next two nights . In a cabin. I told him I'm not drinking. He said he won't too! We have the supermarket run to do but the intention is pretty earth shattering by his standards!

Oh! What's more he knows I have no problem not drinking if he does. So this is something that's coming from him.

@Onewildandpreciouslife that is tough. Well done nt turning to the quick fix. Day 10 done

@Onewildandpreciouslife thinking you x

Morning all.
Big sleep last night. Huge weekend with the storage coming in.
Daughter has a short week at university so another trip for mother tomorrow.

The interview went well. Not paying the money but I shall do stage two next week to see if I can get hybrid contract. I just hope my ex employer doesn't state I am a lush.

What lovely updates @Minutebyminute @Rachael2023 and @stilldumdedumming !

Glad the interview went well @WendyWagon

Thanks for the supportive messages. Visit to mum was better than expected - I had the kids with me so she was on good form. They’re going to get the doctor to visit to see about putting her on anti anxiety meds.

and I’m on holiday now!

Hi sober gang - just a quick check in for me as I am about to make myself go for a trot around the local park as I have been working from hope all day with no fresh air!

Day 19 and I will not drink today!

Morning all.
Up too early. One tea down.

All beautiful here on the empty retreat site! Morning stroll and slept brilliantly. No weird horrible sleeping and not missed the booze at all on this trip. Think the wine witch may be waiting for me at home but that's for later.

Well done everyone- it's not easy!

Can I sneak back in? I did 5 weeks sober over May and June and thought I could moderate.. we all know how that ends so I am back and starting day 3! Doctors appointment today for prolonged dizzyness. Last time it was low vitamins so will see what they say. Have a good day everyone.

Morning all. 3 weeks for me today, and a weekend away AF under my belt. Counting down until my summer holidays. (If the summer ever comes?!)

Hello all. Full school holiday disorientation here, I’ve spent all week thinking that every day was Saturday. Dd and dh off to cinema shortly so looking forward to a bit of solo time to reset my mind.

congratulations to everyone on all the wins, large and small. I’ll be back later today.

Afternoon all. Hearty waves to all. Massive hugs to all who are struggling and much kudos for all the victories.

Well. The dog and I had our week away on Dartmoor last week - my first proper holiday since 2016 and certainly my first AF one. It was, shall we say, "eventful". And very expensive. I am just bringing myself to a point where I can smile about it and begin to talk about it - just. But suffice it to say that chaos abounded. I must have done something bad in a previous life to deserve the sequence of events that overtook us (a lifetime's work stamping on kittens to judge from the predicaments we found ourselves in, if karma should indeed be a thing).

I think I am going to have to write it all down (not here, that would be unfair) in order to believe that it all happened and to try and process it. My chapter headings would be:

1. The waterproof jacket that never was;
2. The possessed GPS, its replacement and the wilderness OTP;
3. [readers of a sensitive nature: turn away and look ye not back] - THE DOG, HIS EPIC MISADVENTURE ON THE REMOTE NORTH MOOR... AND NUMEROUS MEMBERS OF HIS MAJESTY'S ARMED FORCES; 😱😳😱*
4. The deathly Chocolate of Kindness, plus Curry of Concealment (hiding chicken in my pants);
5. The aftermath and the Australians.

But, despite it all, I did not resort to drink (despite the sorest of provocations). So I will count all of the above as a "win". And it would have been many, many times worse through the fug of alcohol.

It will be alright soon. Strength and love to all. xx

*dog is alive and unharmed. The little git.

I want to read that book!

I think an audio would be fitting. How's your narration @REP22 ?

We've come home from the cabin and dp has made m drive about an hour out of my way in the pouring rain to get some rum. He isn't supposed to have spirits so I'm not very happy at all.

Also Sinead O'Connor has floored me slightly.

Evening all
not keeping up with all the posts now sorry!
well done on each and every win big and small ( they’re all big btw!)
if it’s slipped or you are wavering just stand still and breathe then picture yourself AF. What do you see? Hopefully you see the best version of you there could be. You are so worth doing this for yourself and all those that care about you.

I am two years dry this week and so thankful I put myself first and have maintained this AF journey.

many false starts and sorry hiccups before I found this place so thank you to everyone who posts and contributes. I couldn’t have done it without you x

I ran out of evening! Congratulations on two years @AlloftheTime . Well done.
@REP22 sometimes the best bit of a holiday is coming home again. That does sound memorable though.
@stilldumdedumming that must have been a brutal return to reality after your cabin. I rarely buy alcohol for dh now, he tends to sort himself out.
Congratulations to everyone hitting those tough entry level milestones whether or not it's your first time in the AF rodeo. I am grateful that I can tip myself into bed and know that I won't be wide awake with a racing mind three hours later.

Morning all.
I know what you mean about Sinéad O’Connor @stilldumdedumming - her voice was often a soundtrack to my college years, so it feels personal

Morning all, yes - I was so sad at the Sinead O’Connor news - an amazing talent and such sad things happened to her.

Day 21 today for me - today I will not drink! Hope everyone has a good day!!

@stilldumdedumming I am sorry to hear about the rum incident. That must have been very grim for you, in more ways than one. Sending hugs.

I like the idea of an audiobook - but it would probably descend into frenzied swearing after a few minutes, hehe

@Blackberryblossom yes, it was something of a relief to come home. The journey back was slow and grim, in atrocious weather - but I kept in mind that I had the dog in the car with me, which could easily have been very much not the case, and I am thankful for that. Also thankful for the clear head and not waking up with the racing mind.

Also saddened by the passing of Sinead O'Connor. No age at all. She had a troubled life but so much talent.

Strength and love to all. x

Morning all. I was out with the dog early but we met a lovely lady and Badger the terrier. (they are odd up here, first one I felt like chatting to). We walked and talked. The dog is knackered.
I should have my new product samples today. Very exciting. I must get them out to some friends for trial.
Fleebaying away. Lots to sort but I did buy a fab new lampshade.
Not drinking the faux gin at the moment. I think I get a bit spotty from the quinine.
DD had another incident at university re personal safety this time. I have left her in the scratcher. I can't do more tears and temper.
Spag bol tonight.
@AlloftheTime huge congrats. Two years. Fab.

Tbh I was a bit pissed off on another thread with the statements about alcohol dependancy. Yes it can be awful for everyone in the family but I do believe in change. I have never felt comfortable with the expression once an alcoholic etc. Ditto people in recovery that live in fear of death. Our relationship with booze is difficult but if there is no chance of recovery, there is no hope.
Every day not drinking is a blessing. Bless you all my friends x

@WendyWagon sorry to hear about your daughter. Hope all will be well. x

Best of luck with the samples.

I get a bit despondent at some of the threads like the one you mention. Sweeping statements and broad generalisations can be a terribly cruel stick to be beaten with. How would the human race ever survive if people were not capable of change? No-one would ever have any hope or chance of redemption.

I also get quite aerated at some of the threads where a poster is clearly at their tether's end in dealing with difficult family members (elderly or otherwise) and posters pile on with statements like "I could never treat my lovely mum that way" or "you only get one parent" and worse/insulting variations thereof. They don't have any idea of what it's like to deal with a relative whose aim and chief pleasure in life is crushing the spirits of others.

I do get that it is difficult to be a relative of someone with a drink problem. But we are all people with a pathway in - and, if we try, a pathway OUT. Otherwise we wouldn't be here, on this thread, right now. There is hope and there is a better life ahead, even though it's not always easy.

With love. x

Morning shipmates.
I, Sav are bloody proud of myself.
I didn't go on the booze last night after a horrendous offer from the manufacturing company. It was a real skinflint deal with no respect or decency. I actually said no. I can't do the driving with this fibromialga and I would rather work in Tesco. I hate it when people are mean and self serving. They can stick it up their propelling lipstick! (they are women too but obviously not members of the sisterhood).
My bath and body line sounds much more appealing to me. It's a risk but I know the stuff is lovely and everyone who has tried it wants more.
We have a full weekend to clear the old toys and total crap that came in last Sunday. (DC 20/24😁) The DH will be on recycle duty. He loves to load the car and leg it. Suits me or he moons about wanting feeding.
I need to go hunting again for a decent AF wine. My taste buds have changed so much since January 2022. I think too much tonic is making me spotty. Have a great Friday.