The support thread (continued) for an alcohol free life. All welcome.

[WendyWagon]

Hello and welcome to the alcohol free support thread. We are a welcoming bunch. These threads were started by @drybird some three years ago.
We are a mixture of sober sisters (and the odd gent) who want to lead a alcohol free life. We chat about everyday things that we use to drink to manage. No question too silly. Someone will have done/thought or been through the same.

Good morning all.
Lots of sleep this weekend. Doctor's appointment this morning re some weight management. The fact I don't drink makes it so much easier. It is a funny conversation the first time someone asks you if you drink.

I come from a huge drinking family. Not my parents as my uncles were alcoholics after being prisoners of war (if we think we have problems their story was so much worse). My mother wouldn't keep drink in the house. However every other set of the family has a problem drinker. Cousins, siblings etc.
Interestingly all the grandchildren aged 18-36 are lite/non drinkers.
Hopefully it is going out of fashion.

wendywagon that's interesting. My grandad was a prisoner of war too and had a difficult relationship with alcoho. Not when he was younger (he was 19 when first caught and spent almost 5 years imprisoned) but later. I do think it was a way to cope with the memories.

Also agree on the younger ones not being as mad about it as my generation were. Although i find in my line of work a lot of women my age (52) who were never really drawn into the drinking culture. I just don't think I saw them. Or maybe I did, but outwardly thought they were "boring". I think i secretly always admired them for not following the crowd and lots of them have done some really exciting things in their life. But i do try to have a sense of not regretting my past. It has brought me to where I am now, and I quite like where I am now.

Day 8 and had a busy, stressful day at work ... really fancied a glass of wine when I got in! Told myself there's nothing stopping me - if I really want one I can have one.

But first must work through my toolbox of tricks to make a proper decision.. decided it's because I'm starving hungry, tired, a bit overwhelmed (washing-up stacked high, laundry to do, shopping to unpack and dinner still to make). A bit pissed off (cat has sprayed somewhere in the hallway).

Effectively I then played the evening forward to after that initial short buzz.

Instead decided to have a handful of Haribo and a cup of tea, followed by a nice dinner. Feel fine now!

Checking in.

I also come from a long line of alcoholics. My father died of liver failure as a result. Despite this, four of his five children drink/drank to excess. One has a lifelong health condition that requires medication you can’t drink with. Of the four of us drinkers, three of us are/were daily drinkers, consuming too much over the week (50 units plus)

The fourth, my youngest brother, is a fair way down the road to total obliteration. He drinks every waking hour. I am NC with him after too many unforgivable things.

It is so sad 😞

Just popping on here to say I'm day 7 sober. After advice on my thread last Tuesday I phoned AA. Best thing I ever did. I already have a little network of women who are checking in on me and they have been so incredibly warm and support. Went to my first online meeting on Saturday which was overwhelming and eye opening ( I stayed off camera and mute) but will be going again on Wednesday and feel ready to put it camera on and speak. I've tried so many times in the past to give up but this time I'm going to do it. I think having a real life support network is what will make the difference for me.

Well done @jeifinjenkins on 7 days! Same to you @KateOopNorth, would have been easy to crack the wine after a stressful day, you’ll feel so much better for it today!

Today marks my 3 week anniversary since I last had a drink. In that time I’ve had a flooded bathroom (twice!!), a bit of a to do with my parents, the odd 60+ hour, and stressful as hell week at work, and just general things that pop up that used to send me running to the shop for wine.

Never saying never, I’m so new to this, but I genuinely don’t see myself wanting to drink ever again. To be in a mindset to say that after daily drinking for the last 15 years, upwards of 80/90 units per week, is mind blowing. I couldn’t get past day 1 so many times. I’d swear that morning, waking up bleary eyed, feeling like a burst couch that I wouldn’t drink tonight. But come 4pm I’d be on my way to the shop.

Morning all.
What great stories @Adsy1988 and @jeifinjenkins

Hello everyone! Joining the thread for the first time.

My quitting alcohol story is a little different from most posters'. I had to give up alcohol for medical reasons a month ago, as I developed a form of long Covid that makes me intolerant to alcohol, among other things.

I used to drink in moderation but often, like 1/2 glasses of wine 2/3 times a week.

Well, I have been BLOWN AWAY by the difference!! My dry and flaky skin has turned into healthy, elastic, hydrated skin. I lost 4 pounds in a month (without trying). I sleep much better. Everyone tells me I look 5 years younger!!

Seriously considering giving up alcohol for good even once my intolerance clears up.

Congrats on the 1 week @jeifinjenkins 🥳

@Adsy1988 This is me - so many Day 1s that only lasted a few hours!

Welcome @JollieJullie ☺️ Totally get what you mean about noticing the difference. Today is only day 9 for me and I feel so much better already. Today was the first day I've looked at my face in the mirror and felt like I recognise the old me - the puffiness seems to have gone. Probably because I'm no longer constantly dehydrated and holding on to fluid. A real boost to see this change.

I can't even blame the lack of puffiness on better sleep as I've been struggling to fall to sleep before midnight this week (so used to the wine knocking me out!). But even though I'm only getting 6 hours or less by the time my alarm goes off, it's definitely a better quality of sleep.

Evening all.
Some funny threads tonight (loving the grudge one).
DH on leave this week so I bogged off out. Hoping to get some help from new GP re weight loss. I am throwing cheese away now. Unheard of.

Morning shipmates.
Nowt to report here.
All present and correct.

Sometimes having "nothing to report" is a good thing WendyW

I consider a boring and uneventful day to be a success 😂

All good here, kids went back to school yesterday (I went back on Monday) and its good to get back into a routine. I moan about the grind of it all but routine an structure keep us all sane!

I quite agree @Crunchymum, uneventful is good in my books😂
@WendyWagon throwing the cheese away😱 That’s radical! I think it can be frozen for a rainy (cheesy😂) day. I hope you get good support with the weight loss. Do I remember correctly you were considering weight loss surgery at some point or did I make that up? I hope you find a way forwards. Food is hard!!! If only we could quit food like we can quit booze😂😂😂

Morning @BunniesBunniesBunnies morning @Crunchymum

I was down for baratric surgery but I am still waiting. Two people I know have failed on it and I am now scared. The new semiglutide seems a cheaper option and less risk. I hope to get it next month after some tests. I would be happy to be a size 16 as I am nearly 6ft tall. I love Hobbs and getting into their clothes would make me happy.
Sadly it is my brothers funeral tomorrow. I have hung the dress up but decided not to see him before. A significant number will but I am very visual and he looked so much better at Christmas. I will remember him like that.
After the service I am drawing a line in the sand as it is my DH's 60th. Steak dinner for him. Our move follows the week after.

Ah @WendyWagon that must be hard with the funeral being tomorrow. I will be thinking of you. It is okay to choose to see the body and it is also okay to choose not to see the body. I am like you, I usually opt not to as I prefer to remember the person as they were.

I have heard very good things about semaglutide! That sounds hopeful.

Sending you love and strength for tomorrow.

Such a big day tomorrow WendyW

Sending you all the love and light in the world to help you through it.

Keep strong x

Thinking of you @WendyWagon xx

Deeply regrettably I lapsed at the weekend. Feeling very unwell and desperately hate myself. I can't do that again. Sorry to let you all down. 😢

@REP22 you poor sausage. You have not let us down. You need to dust yourself off and get back on the wagon. Few people are perfect. Hence my name!
Lots of tea and water. Eat some fish if you are not a veggie.
I think of myself as a non drinker who has blipped. Count your wins.

Thank you for your kind words Wendy xx

@REP22 youre not the first person on this thread who has lapsed and you won’t be the last! It’s an awful feeling but dust yourself off and try to be kind to yourself:-)

Thank you Bunnies; much appreciated. xx

Got the hen weekend this weekend. I hope there’s WiFi so I can check in if I have a wobble.

I really don’t want to drink but being a bit socially awkward, I’m worried that I might try to drink to fit in. To not be the odd one out as usual. Does that make sense?

I haven’t had a drink since NYE and I have nearly a full bottle of vodka in my cupboard. So on a day to day basis I’m good.

Maybe it’s because it’s the first holiday sober I will ever have had as an adult 😳

hey Ladies, quick check in - survived my first work conference sober and really felt sorry for everyone around me who were hungover or drunk the whole time. No regrets!!

It makes perfect sense @rothbury but you can handle it. The first 30 minutes or so may feel awkward, but if you can get through that you will be fine. Have a plan for what you will do for that initial settling in period. I also find it helpful to have an early morning plan - an early morning walk, swim, whatever - which will feel like something to look forward to, that you wouldn’t do if you were drinking.

I am fairly socially awkward too, but I’ve been surprised how much easier socialising is sober. I don’t have to constantly watch myself, so I actually find it more relaxed than when I was trying to use alcohol to make me feel like I fit in.

Good work on on the conference @Shanster !

Sorry you’re feeling rough @REP22, but well done for posting. Don’t give yourself a hard time - is there anything you can learn from it?

Morning all.
Tis a cold day for us.
Family of big drinkers but I will have plenty of support with my children at the funeral. I have cried already and ruined my unbloated face. My sister will be there and we don't speak. She was very unkind to me throughout my life and I decided I didn't want her in my life just over a year ago. I haven't missed her and I doubt she will even try to apologise to me.
I hope I can hold it together or it will be like a posh Eastenders!