The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[ChampooPapi]

Adm1010

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

Thank you to @Adm1010 for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

@horlicks4me welcome to the thread, you will climb this mountain and find the more clement and easier footing on the downhill slope on the other side. Stick with us, keep posting, just keep checking in and posting and reading 🙏

The despair and loneliness we may all feel at times

Amen to that Horlicks

Thank you @savBbunny and @horlicks4me for understanding. I think a cup of sleepy tea and an early night may help. Hopefully a good night's sleep will put things in perspective.

Checking in 🙌 reached the 2 week mark

Jesus the first month is hard isn't it 😭🤦

This thread moves so fast! Thank you for the new one @ChampooPapi . Thank you @Adm1010 for the last one too. I also wondered if you were one oh one oh or ten ten … good to have that cleared up!

I’ve promised myself some proper catch-up time here tomorrow but in the meantime… thank you everyone for your lovely congratulations on my milestone. @Crunchymum congratulations on your 40 days! The numbers can feel quite small in the early days but you’re putting down such great strong habits. You asked if life felt very different - it feels calmer. So very much calmer. I don’t have the mental noise any more of an I drinking or am I driving? Weekends continue to be a revelation without hangovers. Sleeping is much better. The food shop is cheaper. My husband is drinking much less too. Nobody buys me gin for birthday presents any more. That was definitely a low point, the year when I unwrapped three bottles of gin. I didn’t want to be that person, and now I am not that person. Hello @horlicks4me thinking of you. It was hard coming out of that lockdown bubble. I’m glad your husband is being supportive. @BrightonBunny I hope you feel better soon.
Sorry for posting and running. I’ll come back tomorrow. I’ve spent the last couple of days getting ahead on the laundry and food shopping so I can have the day off tomorrow. Mothering Sunday gets a bit stressy for me if I’m worrying about laundry mishaps by well-intentioned helpers. Anyway. There is Nosecco and orange juice in the fridge so they can bring me AF Buck’s Fizzes.

@Borrowbox I'm off to do the same, had a serious wobble earlier where it was all I could think about for about two hours. Thank Zeus the sun has gone down now and I'm back in the room so to speak!. Off to bed to enjoy not waking up on mother's Day with thoughts of death, disease and destruction (my usual hangover brain)

Well done everyone, it's so not bloody worth it 🙏

@AlloftheTime and so glad your home! Virtual un-mumsnetty hug 💜

@Blackberryblossom. Thank you for the mention. I remember you from my last time on here.
@ChampooPapi thankyou for your inspiring words and welcome. I see you are 2 weeks in .How are you sleeping?

As you can see I've not strayed far from this thread today. I'm sure I will calm down soon.
It's a clumsy way to say it but I'm glad too see some newbies here as well as some 'old timers'. We are all on the same journey but different stages. It's comforting.x

"We don't argue now but with me it's the absolute crippling anxiety that drinking brings. Also the total lack of motivation to do anything the next day"

My husband and I hardly ever argue, but every argument we have ever had has been when one or both of us was very drunk. Every single one.

Amd the hangxiety. The crippling shame and guilt of having said something horrible to the person I love most in the world. I cannot deal with it, it's awful. Plus hangovers just leave me wretched these days, they wipe out an entire day. I spent the whole of last Saturday in bed, I could not eat. I vomited several times. Fortunately the children were at their dads, I felt so ashamed.

@Mikey555 Sorry to hear about your father, my mums terminally ill and I feel your struggle

Went from a good morning to a shit evening, went out for a meal in a pub with DH, DD, SIL and grandson, coped okish with tonic water and ice, then on the way home found a dead cat ran over and left at the side of the road Took the cat to the closest vets, why do people just leave pets they have hit??

Then gave ex DIL and granddaughter a lift home, and had the delightful news!!! my son is getting into more illegal activities.

Just want a huge drink fest and get blottoed. I wont but the thought is running wild.

I'm sorry you're having a tough day. Understand that urge, but it's avoidance. It won't help. Stay strong x

@spacehardware

I'm sorry you're having a tough day. Understand that urge, but it's avoidance. It won't help. Stay strong x

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Morning all. Checking in. Off to yoga shortly which I love. Hope you all have a great day

Morning all.
I had a huge wobble yesterday.
Felt sorry for myself. I had a conversation with a friend who us unhappy about my sobriety. She wanted to know when I was coming out for a booze up.
It was all very congenial however I felt pressed to agree. The devil appeared on my shoulder and the head games started.
I have only seen this lady once in 78 days. Normally I would see her weekly.
I put a post up to test the waters on moderate drinking. The vast majority of ex boozers can't. I probably can't.
I put myself to bed and feel much better today.

Hi all, checking in - thanks for the thread @ChampooPapi.

I confess I haven’t been keeping up with the thread lately; just haven’t had time to be on MN. Work feels very intense at the moment and I’m struggling, tbh. I feel like there’s nothing to look forward to/ reward myself with at the end of a crappy week. Just feeling tired and flat and overwhelmed. Not helped by listening to a Zoe podcast with Tim Spector this morning about alcohol, going on about how good red wine is for your cardiovascular systen.

Ho hum, keeping plodding on, anyway. Wishing I was feeling some more tangible benefits; my energy levels aren’t any better, nor my skin, nor have I lost any weight, despite having overhauled my diet at the beginning of the year (and not consuming all the wine calories).

At least I’ve saved some money!

Good to read the updates here, and sorry to hear you’re struggling at the moment @SavBbunny.

@PromisesMeanNothingSue

Morning thanks. My son used to say promises mean nothing with regard to my drinking (he is an athlete and the booze police).
I had a crap week last week managing af. However feeling great today. Need more af gin! 😁

I'm afraid that friend sounds like a drinking buddy not a real friend.

Husband had some beers last night, it was interesting actually, after the fourth I could see that slightly slack jaw drunk face start, and then his chat turned to drunk person chat. Love him I'm not criticising him, I've been there a thousand times but it's really interesting to see from the outside.

Anyway he has a hangover and I feel 💯

@spacehardware

My friend is single and of all my close friends she is the one who has been very dismissive. She can get legless, go to bed and laugh about it the next day. No one is there to tick her off. She grew up in a family of men and works in a male dominated industry. We met and bonded over a huge booze up.
I probably need to talk to her about why I needed to stop drinking.
My best friend was my all time party buddy and she has been my sobriety buddy. She can take it or leave it. She told me that I needed to stop. Brave her and I am grateful.

Morning all and thank you for the kind words.

How nice is it waking up not having a drink! It reminds me of a quote that helped me last year. "Nobody wakes up in the morning wishing they had drunk the night before"

Yesterday was very challenging and today is going to be hard. I'm so worried about my father and how my mum will cope if she loses him.

Although it's so tempting to drink I know I wouldn't be able to function if I did so need to stay strong.
Every single bad mistake I've made (and there has been a lot) is down to me having drunk too much.

I just hope it's not too late to change things.

Good luck today everyone

@Mikey555
Never too late.

Morning everyone.
Day 1 over and no temptation but I am aware there is a mountain to climb.
@Mikey555 well done for resisting tempatation. I lost my Dad nearly 6 years ago and it's so hard. I drank my way through it a lot of the time as I believed it was my crutch and my wind down tool at the end of the day. I'm not the first and won't be the last. I am determined it will be MY last though.
Happy Mother's Day to all Mum's out there. I have grown up children who aren't aware of my struggle. They just see me as a social drinker and have taken to asking me if I'm on or off the drink. The thought of saying I'm a tee total keeps me going. (Do people use that phrase anymore?)

@horlicks4me

Sorry I didn't say hello before. I have had a ropey week. My latest binge fest started after my dad died (he was such a nice man but was ill and 81). 4 1/2 years ago.
I say AF and one of my great friends has named it (ah f*ck), as in af wine as it is so grim.
My dcs are 18/22 and they have seen the worse of my behaviour. I don't want them embarrassed as they have been. Neither like booze but I don't think it is fashionable anymore?
Husband not a drinker, has rum older than our children!

Hi @SavBbunny.
My children are older than yours and I have young Grandchildren. I had my kids pretty young! They both drink socially but are careful as they both love to keep fit. I think education and social media/fashion has made alcohol unfashionable in recent years so that can only be a good thing. It certainly was the 'in thing' for me.
I hope the coming week is better for you. Onwards and upwards x

"Nobody wakes up in the morning wishing they had drunk the night before"

Love love this, and how very true.

I'm another one who's drinking really spiralled after the sudden death of a patent (my lovely mum, missing her with all my heart today)

It was so sudden and unexpected and I completely unravelled.

I'm trying to claw my way back and find new coping mechanisms and more healthy ways of dealing with my feelings.

Usually I'd toast her (we're a pretty boozy family ) but instead I'm gonna treat myself to her favourite flowers.

Parent not patent