The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[ChampooPapi]

Adm1010

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

Thank you to @Adm1010 for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

Morning everyone - isn't it nice to wake up clear headed?

My husband had a wobble last night and said "ooh I'm thinking of getting some beers" and I said do you really want them tho? Why? He felt stressed / pent up - we talked it out and he decided to park it for half an hour, then the mood just lifted. So glad.

spacehardware thats great! Are you both doing it together? That must be a wonderful support.

Yes we are each other's very best cheerleaders, but we can also enable so it has a flip side! I think he expected me to say 'oooh weeellll if you're going to the shop' and then we'd settle in for a boozy Friday night. It's not as fun without your drinking buddy!

We both need to lose weight, and ditch the booze for good. we are both responsible citizens, boring middle aged, there's no drunken fights etc but alcohol does not serve either of us well!

Thanks for the support and words of encouragement.

Today is a new day.

I'm still struggling with the idea of having a birthday or going on holiday (or having Christmas) without wine but I really feel like I've had a change of mindset with the ad-hoc drinking / drinking for the sake of drinking.

Today I match my longest dry period (41 days) other than pregnancy and breastfeeding. And to be honest I drank in late pregnancy with DC2 and DC3 - they were both January born so I was 8+ months at Christmas and had a few glasses of red here and there with them both (They aren't twins either!! Was just bad planning, poor January babies)

I'm thinking of paying for some private therapy to explore my drinking but really don't have the cash at the moment. What I save on wine has already been gobbled up on price increases elsewhere. I can't afford to drink anymore

Morning everyone and thank you for the warm welcome.

I'm only on day 2 but feel much better. I managed to get through Friday night which was especially hard. My son was a way and he doesn't like me drinking so a good excuse to have one. Also, I cried to my husband on Thursday about my crippling anxiety after drinking and how I needed his help to stop.
He met me from work already a bit drunk and tried to persuade me to go out for a few!
Even bought a bottle of wine for the house. I was really tempted but told him to go out without me and I went to bed early.

Such a small step but feel proud I got through that and now have the energy to clean the house today!

Checking in
@ChampooPapi I’m home and recuperating 👍
Good to hear you sounding so positive and upbeat. Have a good weekend all

Wow what a beautiful morning, I'm really appreciating waking up sober and not hungover

DH has never been a big drinker and is going AF with me, so thats a great help. Not sure how well I would cope if he had a few on an evening sat next to me!

@Mikey555 Could you see if DH would be willing to give being AF a go with you?

Morning all.
@Crunchymum
I have private counselling, it is £1 a minute. I pay for it out of my wine fund. I will only do it for six months.
@AlloftheTime
glad you are home. Your own bed😁

Well the ads between posts on our thread today are reduced booze. Brilliant idea? Not.
Not doing so well. Losing my commitment. Stress, bored and losing my social life. I am playing deals in my mind.

Just checking in on the new thread to congratulate everyone on amazing milestones!!!🤩🥳🤩🥳🤩🥳

@Breathmiller sorry about the glasses but well done for negotiating a tricky moment. I’ve had a really hard week workwise, to urge to smoke (funnily not so much drink) was enormous but I resisted the urge and woke up this morning with lovely clean lungs.

Am bloody knackered at the moment but at least I’m not drinking🥳

Afternoon all. Checking in

@AlloftheTime glad you're home. Hope you're feeling ok?

@SavBbunny sorry you're not good. Sending positive vibes.

@Mikey555 well done to you.

Afternoon all 😊

Day off today so I’ve finished all my jobs and I’m now firmly ensconced in my comfy chair in the garden . It’s a gorgeous day 😊

I’ve bought some becks blue just in case and I’ve got seedlip and tonic as well . I strongly associate my garden with drinking so I think it’s wise to have those there in case .
At the minute coffee and lemon drizzle cake are hitting the spot

Hi everyone! 2nd time around for me. I first joined when I went AF in December 2019 and managed 5 months alcohol free. It was the 1st time I had laid off alcohol for MANY YEARS! I found it very difficult at first (as most of us do) especially getting into a decent sleep pattern and surviving the witching hour (4pm for me). Covid struck the following March but I started to find it easier. A lovely Spring arrived and I felt confident I could moderate............ YEAH RIGHT!!! I started well and drank the correct weekly units and gave myself a pat on the back. Then I realised I was drinking more but not as much as I used to. I don't want to ramble on but suffice to say I'm back where I started. Went to a Wake yesterday in a pub and fell in the street on the way home. To say I am mortified is an understatement and I did a silly thing when I went to bed. I'm glad I woke up and am grateful to be alive. I have never felt as low as I do now and need your support to crack the habit.
It's good to see some old names on here . Well done all of you.
I need to stay alive for my family and myself.
Thanks for listening /reading.
Day one for me (again).

You can do it horlicks

We've just been for a lovely long walk and fish and chips at the seafront. Beautiful day, lovely to see so many people on the beach / pier / promenade

Welcome back @horlicks4me

It's my first time in these threads but I've had way too many 'day ones' ..... I am determined not to have another one but if I do then I'll just start again and know that any moves I make towards being AF are better than continuing to drink.

@horlicks4me welcome back! Were you still on the thread in April 2020? I think I remember you! In any case, good to have you back!

@spacehardware thank you.
@Cruncymum I am really detemined to make this my last Day 1.
@BunniesBunniesBunnies -- yes I was still here in April 2020 and I remember you. I came off the thread to moderate. Alas...
Many thanks for your replies. I found the support 1st round invaluable and know I will again.

Checking in on day 48. Still here still sober.

@SavBbunny hope your feeling stronger. Don’t listen to the wine witch she is just having a desperate attempt to draw you in. Firm no and slam the door in her stinking face 😫.

Welcome and welcome backs.

I dread the moderation making its wistful way back in. My DH is absolutely not stopping. He isn’t even interested in why I have 🤷‍♀️ I can’t decide if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I think he just doesn’t see my drinking as an issue and he certainly doesn’t see his. And I guess it isn’t 🤷‍♀️ He doesn’t drink excessively but he is having a beer or a cider every evening. However I would never stop at one… I guess it just means the temptation will always be there but maybe that is a good thing. He won’t pressure me to drink though. But he also wouldn’t stop me if I tried. One day I need to explain it all but that isn’t today 🤫

@horlicks4me you have done it before and you can do it again!💪

I am absolutely unable to moderate. One evening - yes. One week - yes. But it creeps up and up, and ends with me feeling hanging and swearing never again. Rinse and repeat a week, two, three or six weeks later.

I reject the term alcoholic, I don't find it helpful or true. But I do recognise addiction and I am an addict. I won't always be an addict. I was a nicotine addict when I smoked. When I stopped smoking I stopped being a nicotine addict. But if I started again - if I had one or two at a party, I'd be buying a pack of my own the next day.

Evening all, hope you are all doing well. I am really struggling today, the beautiful weather, a family party where everyone else was drinking. I am 7 weeks today, it is my birthday and holiday next week and I just keep thinking "maybe just moderating would be OK?" I know it won't but the thoughts are really bothering me.

Welcome back horlicks Well done for coming back and thanks for sharing.

@BraveFaceScaredInside I've asked him as he drinks far too much too.
He says he will try and secretly I don't think he likes it when I don't drink!

The first lockdown we both drank far too much and had some terrible arguments. But last year I really sorted myself out. Stopped drinking, lost weight and was looking and feeling great. Then slowly slowly back to before.
We don't argue now but with me it's the absolute crippling anxiety that drinking brings. Also the total lack of motivation to do anything the next day.

I've had an awful day today. My father is seriously I'll and I had to drive two hours away to help my mum. I've just got home and so want a drink but I need to drive back tomorrow so I'm going to resist.

@horlicks4me I've felt like you many many times. You can do this!
Sending love and positive thoughts x

Hi "Horlicks* I'm on day 6 I've had many day ones over the last year. I feel a determination I haven't had since I stopped drinking for 14 months in Nov 2019. I'm clinging on to that..

Borrowbox it's my birthday in a few weeks I've asked my friends and family to not organise anything.. maybe a lunchtime meal with my children. I've told them they can go out that night and celebrate in the pub 😅
I tried moderating for a year and honestly the mental torture wasn't worth it

@Borrowbox

11 weeks here and feeling pretty much the same as you. I don't want to trigger any one so haven't posted my struggle here.
I asked a question on another thread. Some interesting answers from long time af peeps.

@Borrowbox. Thank you. My 1st AF stint was during the Winter and it was the re-opening of pubs and the thought of sitting outside in the sun that prompted me to moderate . This is something that my husband and I really enjoy together. I feel your pain and it will make this AF stint very hard for me. I had the conversation with him earlier and he is thankfully supportive.
@Mikey555 sorry to hear about you Father. Thank you for the kind words.
@OkPedro . I wish you success this time. We will be at a similar stage.

I feel slightly better this evening than when I woke up this morning. Thank you all for the kind comments. It means a lot and helps with the despair and loneliness we may all feel at times. x