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Alcohol support

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Original poster

I am done. Anyone fancy joining me?

210 replies

Rupertpenrysmistress · 07/12/2021 07:49

So I have an alcohol problem. Have done for years, Christmas may not be the best time to stop but I have to. It's killing me and destroying my family. I will take today to make my plan. I already have all the quit books just need to do it now.

Any long term sober people have any tips for me? I guess at the moment it's hour by hour.

OP posts:
rumred · 25/01/2022 10:05

Hello everyone. Day 26 here. I think I'm getting to the bored and tempted stage. The initial momentum has gone and so too the novelty value. I suppose a 40 year habit won't just disappear without a fight.
It feels like hard work at the moment but I know it's worth it.
Best get working and sober podcasts playing

fenulla · 25/01/2022 10:40

Hello all
I've just listened to this audiobook
Pretty good

I am done. Anyone fancy joining me?
rumred · 25/01/2022 19:55

I've heard William porter talk but haven't read his stuff. Will give it a go, thanks

Original poster
Rupertpenrysmistress · 25/01/2022 21:32

I really rate Craig Beck, he makes so much sense and he really gets it. Is everyone finding their sleep is improving?

Sadly though, no weight loss, I feel less bloated though. Next thing to concentrate on I guess!

OP posts:
fenulla · 26/01/2022 08:11

No weight loss and I'm over a month in
Sleep poor for other reasons
I know it will improve when I'm eating better and it would be worse if I were drinking

Original poster
Rupertpenrysmistress · 26/01/2022 21:58

Hi fenulla my weight loss is also not happening as I am not too worried about a diet just yet, will think about that at some point. My sleep is not too bad but I so take nytol a couple of times a week as it helps reset my sleep.

It is so lovely waking without a hangover.

OP posts:
fenulla · 27/01/2022 22:24

Ah maybe nytol would help- thanks
Yes, freedom from hangovers is joyous

rumred · 28/01/2022 10:14

Hello all. My sleep is better but the early evenings are difficult. I miss the buzz of the first drink. My biscuit consumption has risen dramatically. 31 days sober. I'm proud of myself but rather flat. Or maybe just not as up and down as I used to be. Which is good I suppose.

rumred · 28/01/2022 10:16

I read something about anhedonia, emotions being flat for 6 months after quitting booze. Does anyone else relate to this?

1Step2Step · 28/01/2022 10:20

No weight loss for me either. I’ve managed to walk almost everyday and assumed I’d lose a little bit of weight. Darn metabolism.

Sleep is definitely better and I feel like my face looks better.

SeasideRock · 28/01/2022 12:11

Seven days so far for me. Not been too hard so far. I've been having a really tough time at work in recent months and I realized with some shock before Christmas that I was easily getting through a bottle of wine a night - and spending my weekends hungover.

It's early days, but I am already noticing better sleep. I've stocked up with some AF alternatives, (Martini Vibrante isn't too bad at all), and have got some quit-lit sorted.

Waiting for the weightloss and glowing skin now..., at the moment I still look red-faced and puffy.

SeasideRock · 28/01/2022 12:13

Also trying to switch from fags to a vape at the same time as one seems to trigger the other if that makes sense? I do wonder if I'm mad trying to do both... anyone got any experience of this?

rumred · 28/01/2022 20:24

I gave up fags and started vaping about 6 years ago. Once you get used to vaping it's alright. I'd see how you get on and don't pressure yourself too much if the vaping doesn't work out immediately

BlondeDogLady · 30/01/2022 13:50

Wondered if I could join this chat.

After drinking wine every night for about 10 years, me and DH have decided to cut right down. We started on the 9th January.

So far, we have had 13 alcohol free nights this month.

I'm so pleased! But we are still drinking at the weekend. Feel a bit shit today, right enough!

BlondeDogLady · 30/01/2022 14:06

I used to drink at least 3 bottles of wine a week and permanently felt fed up and awful

Oh dear, I feel dreadful when I read comments like this, as 3 bottles a week, would be a number I would aspire to cut down to. Have been drinking 2 bottles a night for years. Yes, 14 bottles a week. If I could drink 3 bottles spread over Friday and Saturday night it would be miraculous. I have started, I guess.

OfNick · 30/01/2022 16:22

@SeasideRock

Also trying to switch from fags to a vape at the same time as one seems to trigger the other if that makes sense? I do wonder if I'm mad trying to do both... anyone got any experience of this?
Just joining this thread as I need to quit desperately. I drink too much and have done for years. What you've said here completely resonates with me though. I won't drink if I'm not smoking but I'm always drinking so always on the fags. It seems to go hand in hand.
brightspice · 30/01/2022 21:51

@BlondeDogLady the first step is to not feel dreadful about how much you drink. While you feel bad about 2 bottles a night, to someone else that may be an aspirational goal.

The next question is: do you know what your triggers to drink are? For instance: do you know when/why you'll have your first drink tomorrow?

I do this stuff for a living and am very happy to help.

BlondeDogLady · 31/01/2022 11:15

[quote brightspice]@BlondeDogLady the first step is to not feel dreadful about how much you drink. While you feel bad about 2 bottles a night, to someone else that may be an aspirational goal.

The next question is: do you know what your triggers to drink are? For instance: do you know when/why you'll have your first drink tomorrow?

I do this stuff for a living and am very happy to help.[/quote]
Hi brightspice

I don't think it's triggers, we were just opening the wine at 7pm every night with dinner, and drinking until we went to bed. We both have good jobs. Both getting up early for work. Completely functioning in every way.

We often talk about retiring in our mid to late 50's (in about 6 years), and both often say we must stop drinking or our retirement will be short!

On 9th January we quit drinking Sunday thru Thursday - no alcohol at all. But do still drink Friday and Saturday. This feels monumental for us, having not had a break for years - and so far we are enjoying it. I would never have thought I would say that!

My sleep is rubbish though. I'm tired at 10pm, go to bed at 10.30pm, then I'm awake almost hourly until we get up at 6.30pm. Nightmares are hellish. And I'm up for a wee every couple of hours, even though I've only had one pint of water with dinner - no idea what that's about?

We drank Friday and Saturday just gone, and we couldn't finish anything on TV as our concentration was shot. I don't remember going to bed either night. Both had handovers yesterday. You do wonder why we did that. Didn't drink last night, and feel great again today!

brightspice · 31/01/2022 13:17

@BlondeDogLady it sounds like the trigger (or cue) is dinner. Do you know what thought you're thinking when you reach for the bottle to open at 7?

BlondeDogLady · 31/01/2022 13:38

[quote brightspice]@BlondeDogLady it sounds like the trigger (or cue) is dinner. Do you know what thought you're thinking when you reach for the bottle to open at 7?[/quote]
It was just pure habit.

I think we are breaking the cycle now though, as we are having squash with dinner 5 nights a week. The change has been a long time coming though!

brightspice · 31/01/2022 13:54

Habit is a powerful force.

Good to hear that you've broken the cycle.

1Step2Step · 31/01/2022 14:19

So it’s now been an entire month of no alcohol . I really expected to have my craving for it diminish or disappear and it hasn’t been the case. I also expected to feel “so much better” for it but I’ve been riddled with headaches and my usual migraine. I also had my covid booster that put me through the ringer for 3 days.

brightspice · 31/01/2022 14:35

@1Step2Step to reduce your cravings for it you need to get to the root of the matter and get rid of your desire. Abstaining through willpower won't do it in the long run (which is why counting days doesn't work for many).

The next time you have a craving to drink pause for a moment and really feel that feeling. Let it roll over you. What is the thought you have in that moment?

BlondeDogLady · 31/01/2022 14:41

@1Step2Step

So it’s now been an entire month of no alcohol . I really expected to have my craving for it diminish or disappear and it hasn’t been the case. I also expected to feel “so much better” for it but I’ve been riddled with headaches and my usual migraine. I also had my covid booster that put me through the ringer for 3 days.
By Thursday, I am gagging for wine, I am not going to lie. I also have a headache every day now, not sure why? I am also peeing tonnes. Up 4 times a night. Why?
1Step2Step · 31/01/2022 22:22

I guess it’s wanting that feeling of relaxation I get from my first (or second) glass. I am/was a habitual drinker but never to the point of being drunk. I’d tend to stop after 1/2-3/4 of a bottle of wine and it would take me a while to get through that during the afternoon and evening. I would drink every day and anticipate that buzz from my drinks.

I’m not sure if I should treat wine as something to try and avoid at all costs and try to stay teetotal or as something akin to chocolate where I need to make sure I only imbibe once a week and set an allowance. I definitely don’t want to be drinking everyday , it didn’t make me feel good.