Mindfulness, Moderating and Not Texting In The Kitchen !

[Amdone123]

Morning all..hope you're all ok. Well I had busy weekend. I didn't quite stick to my plans : I drank Friday evening ( didn't eat), and drank last night, too. I don't feel great today but I am looking forward to having a break. I know I want to get back to being af and all its benefits.
I was thinking that I am able to stay in and not drink. My next step will be going out and not going mad !

I went out with work colleagues last night. I had 4 gins and a Corona. I was not even tipsy really, just happy & a bit tired. I had a good time and got home by 11pm.
Normally I would have stayed out and kept drinking until I was drunk and not remember coming home!

Not great last night but better than normal. Opened the wine DH bought. Should have stuck to 2 glasses but had three and that was one too many but on the flip side I didn't finish the bottle which I usually 'have' to do.

Gemzee sounds a great night out and well done for stopping when you did.

@anewtoday Thanks It's great that you didn't finish the bottle! I always struggle with wine, which is why I have avoided it the last couple weeks.

I am staying at my mums tonight for a drinks night - we watch music videos on Youtube, chat rubbish and normally get though 3 bottles of Prosecco between us! (Did do 4 once but we put a stop to that!). I don't know if I'll be able to moderate to be honest and I'm looking forward to it so we will see

So yesterday did not go well! 2 Coronas at lunchtime, a gin then a bottle & a half of Prosecco in the evening!
I had fun but felt so tired all day.
I always normally drink on Sundays but not today so at least this week will have had 5 AF days

@Gemzee, well done on 5 af days. Regarding the night with your mum, at least you had fun.
I went out Friday with my dsis - drank 2 x wine (bottles) and smoked. Up til then I'd had 20 af days ( had that half bottle of prosecco and rose, but moderated). I had a great time though. We spent the night dancing.
Yesterday was my grandaughter's birthday and I had a bottle of wine, then sipped brandy ( I don't even like brandy !!). I was drunk but my granddaughter was happy as I let her paint my body !! I looked like a tiger this morning. I was in grave danger this morning of beating myself up but the lifecoach I spoke to said not to do this and I'm so proud that I'm not feeling guilty or ashamed like I usually do. I wouldn't speak to anyone else like that so I'm not doing it to myself.
Oh I lost 2.5lb so that's 7lb in total (2 weeks)
Got 3 x zumba booked this week so that should burn the cals !
I'm not drinking now til November as I'm doing Sober October.

Morning all @confusedaf29*@Gemzee @Buntyforgirls* @AJL1234 @Hohofortherobbers @Mj20 ( sorry if I've missed anyone!). How are we all doing?
I've been ok. My mindset is still changing ( slowly but surely). I've had a couple of blips but not beating myself up, just accepting that it really does make me so utterly depressed the next day. I last drank Sunday and not wanted any this week at all. No plans to drink weekend but of course October begins Friday so am starting 30 days af. I've done it before and I'll do it again.
I looked at my journal for September. Out of 30 days, I've had 25 af so am pleased with that. Out of the 5 I drank 3 were birthday celebrations and slightly messy but the other 2 were Moderation amounts so overall not bad at all.
Hope you're all doing OK.

Morning! I’ve done rubbish 🤣 was so good on the lead up to holiday and well, went down hill from there! Had the most amazing time, but I am back giving my head a wobble. Am looking forward to October kicking in, new month, fresh start and all that! Am really going to try for a full month sober. How are you doing? I’ll catch up with all the posts when I’ve finished work today, that will give me some incentive to stay on the straight and narrow 😊

I'm doing good, AF Sun, Mon & Tues and plan to be AF tonight & Thurs as well. I have friends over on Friday & we haven't met for drinks for years so it may get messy!

Hi there, I'm not doing so well this week, Fri, sat, sun I had my half bottle, but had a rather overwhelming start to the week and carried on Mon and Tuesday. I now have half a bottle staring at me and just want to finish it tonight. I gave had 11 dry days in Sept, but am looking likely not to make 12....

Have screen shot of my month here

The question mark hovering over today is very much where my mind is at

@Hohofortherobbers, well don't worry about it. It's all a learning curve. Just keep trying. It's so hard when life gets in the way. I'm the same with healthy eating - I can do it if I become a hermit.

Hi all . @Hohofortherobbers, don’t forget your unit count- this is looking good, and something to be proud of too.
Well done to all for getting back on it when we slip- which is pretty much where I still am! If I didn’t have friends I’d be fine!!😀

Who is up for a dry October then? I have been failing miserably. Just need to keep trying.

@youboozeyoulose, morning! Well I was up for it. Walked to tesco to get my ingredients for the lovely meals I'm planning this week and told myself not to buy any. Got stressed shopping ( I like to throw anything in but needed certain ingredients and I hate looking), loitering around the wine aisle and shoved in 2 bottles. I like wine when I'm cooking. I've not drank since Sunday and am pissed off the 1st is today. And I get weighed tomorrow! Of course I don't have to drink both bottles and I'll try to just have 1.
I could start tomorrow (!!!) ; no doubt I'll be never drinking again.

Can I join please?

I struggle with moderation. Did 3 months sober during lockdown, felt great but returned to bad habits of not being able to stop pretty much straight away. Found it easy in lockdown because no socialising. I have social anxiety and alcohol makes me relax and feel happy.
I’m currently hungover after drinking 2 bottles of red on Wednesday, I’d intended to have 2 glasses 🤦‍♀️ I hate that I don’t have control when I do drink, but can quite easily go a week or two without.
Can anyone explain what mindful drinking is? It’s a term I’ve come across a lot but never found an explanation for.

Total fail yesterday as DH bought a bottle of wine home and I drank the lot. Had been AF for a few days but felt awful last night. Why can't I learn .

Out tomorrow so another test to see if I can stop after a couple of glasses.

Something in the air clearly as I also drank wine last night when I didn't plan to! Just over half a bottle - which is actually an improvement in general but still annoying I didn't make it till Friday.
I'm drinking wine tonight & know I'll have too much, pretty much accepted that. Lot on my mind lately which is no excuse.

@Killthewinewitchnow, hi there ! Well done on your 2 months - that's really good. Well I suppose being mindful is just thinking about it. Being aware of how you feel, I guess. Stopping and thinking. Some people use HALT. So, do you need a drink or are you Hungry, Annoyed, Lonely or Tired ( I think!). I drink when I'm tired - it lifts me up, but recently I have tried listening to a podcast or meditating. That helps. I suppose it sounds easy but once you've had 1 glass, all good intentions go out the window ! I don't even like the first glass. It's the 2nd n 3rd that get me going. I drank Sunday last - all through the week, no real problem. Today a different matter. 1st glass 11.40am !! No food, just drank, listened to Rod Stewart (!! ) - I do love him, but all day??!! It's like I'm on a path of self destruction. A therapist would probably tell me I have self esteem issues. Nope !! Love self 💕. Got to laugh. When I'm not drinking I'm super happy. But a bit bored !! @Gemzee, hope you're ok. It's hard when you've got stuff on. It's like this bloody urge to escape but you can't do it physically so do it mentally. At least that's how I feel. @ANewToday, at least you had a few days break. Don't beat yerself up. My friend told me when I was beating myself up over September ( don't know why when I had a good run), that at least I was thinking about it, and trying.

It's a pain though. I agree. At least we can support each other. Tomorrow is another day. I'm starting afresh, just being thankful for the little things ( big things it transpires!).
Stay strong every one - if you have a blip, just learn from it if you can. If I hadn't have gone shopping I wouldn't have drank, but then I'd have no food in. As it happened, I made paella and cheesecake 😋

Friday night dinner out, then to watch Bond. I had 1, yes 1! gin and tonic, then a opted for a hot chocolate!! And no drink in the cinema! All of my choosing, no sense of missing out.

Drank 15 days in September, which were mainly moderateBUT it is the after work drink/ssssss with my 3 best friends where I let myself down, and really need to get a grip.

Wine is my downfall, so I need to avoid it, but as an addictive substance I find it hard once I start...strange that!

Good luck to all, and remember small steps really count. It’s the change of mindset, not the day count that really matters. We will get there.

@Buntyforgirls, well done on your 1 gin. That's really good. Yes, it's wine that's the problem. I lose control when I'm with my dsis - we are quite hopeless together. Mind you, I quite bad on my own. I envy people who don't drink at home !!
Obviously day 1 didn't work for me
But I'm aiming for as many days as I can in October. This is good mindset wise for me as before I would have said, well I've failed at the first hurdle so might as well forget it. But I'm going to keep trying!

@Amdone123, yes it is a slow process!
My drinking relationship with my friends is hopeless too. If I can crack that, I will be doing ok.
I am counting units too- and that is a real eye opener!
How is the therapy going?

@Buntyforgirls, well I'm still listening to my meditation and still journalling and keeping a record of where I want to be. My dh has been really supportive so that helps. I think I'll get there. I'm definitely drinking less than I used to and I'm examining the reasons more and the outcomes more ( forward thinking on one occasion last week stopped me from a potential session).

Amdone123 thanks for the support.

Just back from a lovely meal. Normally I would have ordered a bottle, drank it all and then had a liquor and more wine at home.

Ordered by the glass and it was better because although it doesn't pay money wise it meant I didn't feel obliged to finish the bottle so only had two glasses and then just a coffee after. I think I might keep to glasses rather than a bottle in the future. I tend to look at value for money but decided to ignore the cost today. And because I was reserved at the meal I don't feel compelled to keep drinking at home so win win.

Hope everyone else is having a good weekend despite the awful weather.

@ANewToday, no problem and this is exactly what I need to do when I go out. Order by the glass, have a couple, then dessert and coffee. I have done this recently and felt really proud of myself. It only works when I'm with my dh though. Not my dsis, but baby steps!!
The other week I left the prosecco because I knew had I drank it, it would have set off a session. No doubt about it. So, in the end, it was so worth it.
It's freezing here and so miserable. We've had so much rain. We're hopefully going away at Xmas so something to look forward to. If I continue with my healthy eating and continue in my quest to not let alcohol ruin my life, I'll be in a much better place !